Did he mean this in a nasty way? can't make up my mind?

[SideMouth]

The other night DP was running his hand along my stomach (I'm not fat, I exercise ALOT and don't eat much but have saggy skin around there from pregnancy). However I'm not low on self esteem so it doesn't bother me. I know I'm not fat, it's just a reminder of when I was! lol

Anyway, as I was saying he was running his hand along my stomach and said "mmm sexy stretch marks"

Now the daft question - was he insulting me in a passive aggressive way??

He can hardly comment on my appearance, I could be very nasty back if I wanted to and I'm a bit that he doesn't seem to have realised that.

Or have I taken it the wrong way??

I think the problem is that you could be nasty to him, not what he said tbh. And what did you mean by he can hardly comment on your appearance? Do you mean he doesn't look that great?

Surely you know him well enough to know if he was meaning it nicely or not.

Can't really judge without being there/knowing him/hearing his tone. My ex found stretchmarks sexy.

What I mean is, he used to be very overweight (morbidly obese) and lost weight very quickly ... therefore he can hardly comment on me having a few stretchmarks IYSWIM?

I never would of course, I'm not that nasty but I'm surpised he's commenting on something which could be quite easily thrown back at him.

My ex was constantly making digs at my appearance so I'm perhaps a little 'on guard'.

I wouldn't like it. It's that kind of comment that if you flare up back at him, he'll back away saying "Woooo, can't take a joke?". It's not a joke because its not funny.

Suggest you try the following:

"mmmmm, sexy teeny peeny"
"mmmmm, sexy man boobs"
"mmmmm, sexy beer belly"
"mmmm, sexy blue-white chicken legs"

and see how he likes it.

Or be charitable and assume he was trying to reassure you that he loves you, stretch marks and all. maybe he was genuinely trying to be all New-Man about them. I dunno.

You say you can be nasty but then that you aren't that nasty.

You say have high self esteem then that you are on your guard.

He isn't you ex..

Maybe he actually does find the stretch marks sexy?

Maybe he was clumsily trying to say how sexy he finds you despite minor physical imperfections?

What is it that makes you think he was trying to be nasty?

Why don't you ask him instead of mn?

I think he might actually have found them sexy! Men don't mind things like stretchmarks like we think they might. Unless he normally insults you I wouldn't worry about it.

Are you for real? why are you with this guy?

shall we run the collective MN hands over your stomach and say "mmm sexy stretch marks" for comparison?

only you know you husband and the intonations potential insinuations etc.....go figure

Agree with Reality - just read your other thread too, I'd get rid and would definately not be considerng moving in with him.

As for the stretch mark comment - who knows