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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

..to get so frustrated with overcautious drivers?

63 replies

Joolyjoolyjoo · 08/05/2009 14:06

I'm still seething from my journey to work this morning, which usually takes 20-25 minutes and today took 1hour and 10 minutes! The reason? It was raining. A phenomenon not entirely unknown in this part of Scotland, but which seems to instil great fear in many drivers. Now, I appreciate that wet road surfaces DO require an extra measure of caution- keep a safe distance, be vigilant in poorer visibility and use headlights. But is there really any reason to drive at 15 mph on a normal 40 road? To refuse to even attempt to go round a roundabout, despite having the right of way? And then to change lanes suddenly (although still at 15mph) without indicating? To stop suddenly because there is a puddle (not a flood, not even a large pool of water) on the road? Do people actually think this makes them a safer driver??

And another thing that bemuses me is road cone phobia. Say, for example, you are travelling along a single lane road, which normally then becomes a dual carriageway, but one of the lanes is closed and there are ROAD CONES!! Apparently there is a need to brake to 20mph (despite road signs advising that the limit is now 50, as opposed to the usual 60) and sneak past the road cones. Now, I can only assume that, as the lane is exactly the same width as the one in which you were previously travelling, and the road surface is clear, with no works actually taking place, that these people know something about road cones that I don't. Is it imperative that you sneak past in order that they don't jump out? Are they, in fact, merely sleeping, ready to attack your car in the manner of monkeys at a safari park, pulling at your windscreen wipers and trying to chew through your tyres? Why, why, why? can anyone enlighten me?

Don't get me wrong- I am not a speed freak, but I don't believe that being simply slower makes you safer in all circumstances. If people are really that fearful to drive, should they be driving at all? Or am I just a road-hog, who needs to learn to respect the serious nature of rain and the unpredictability of road cones? Well, am I?

OP posts:

lou222 · 08/05/2009 14:16

lol... i feel your pain!
Nervous drivers can be just as dangerous as speed freaks and really get on my nerves aswell.
Particularly those who don't know what to do at a roundabout so just sit there for ages until it is completely clear.
Or those who see a bus lane and just never dare drive in it even though you can most of the day!!
aaargh

TheArmadillo · 08/05/2009 14:19

YANBU - very nervous/overcautious drivers can be extremely dangerous.

MorrisZapp · 08/05/2009 14:20

Slower drivers may cause nuisance but they don't cause high speed smashes the way 'confident' ie fast drivers can.

So your journey was a big longer, so what, you arrived safely.

Unlike drivers who take risks.

MorrisZapp · 08/05/2009 14:21

In what way can nervous drivers be as dangerous as speed freaks?

Kathyis6incheshigh · 08/05/2009 14:22

Surely changing lanes suddenly without indicating is the sign of a crap driver rather than an overcautious driver?

TheArmadillo · 08/05/2009 14:24

They are unpredictable. They cause accidents as a result. They panic while in charge of half a ton of metal, that is dangerous. Going slower doesn't make unpredictablity safe.

Speed freaks also cause accidents.

Both can be dangerous.

abraid · 08/05/2009 14:25

Over-cautious drivers are a menace. They can cause those behind them to become so frustrated that they take risks.

Yesterday my son and his bus were all late for school because someone very slow in front of them did not pull over and let them past to continue their journey at the legal speed limit.

Original poster

Joolyjoolyjoo · 08/05/2009 14:26

They can be dangerous because they make other people get so frustrated that they then drive dangerously- like BMW boy this morning who, having been confined to 20mph for the last 3 miles, hit the dual carriageway at a rate of knots before veering into my safe-stopping-distance space at the last minute. Now, obviously his bad driving is his own fault, but people who drive unnecessarily slowly precipitate this kind of behaviour. People DO have to get places on time. I leave plenty of time to get to work on time (and believe me, I would take the bus or train if I didn't have 3 children to drop off at three seperate locations before 9am), but people who are overcautious cause frustration, and frustration causes accidents

OP posts:

TheArmadillo · 08/05/2009 14:28

braking suddenly from say 60mph to 20mph especially if there is a lot of cars behind you is dangerous.

To stop suddenly because there is a puddle of water in front of you is dangerous.

Fear means panic and panic means a tendancy to take actions that aren't rational and as a result can become dangerous.

Kathyis6incheshigh · 08/05/2009 14:34

I don't think YABU to deplore over-cautious drivers and wish they wouldn't do it, but I do think YABU to be STILL seething at 2pm about your journey to work several hours ago. It suggests you are getting excessively wound up which is likely to make YOU a less safe driver.
The roads are a full of a mix of people, some good and some crap. There is nothing you can do about then so you need to accept the bad ones are there and cultivate a zen-like calm about it all. Most of the worst drivers I know are the people who get excessively wound up about everybody else's bad driving - the good drivers tend to just float above it and concentrate on driving well (and defensively if necessary) themselves.

mayorquimby · 08/05/2009 14:34

people not going when they have the right of way (especially at round abouts) does my effing nut in.

Original poster

Joolyjoolyjoo · 08/05/2009 14:36

I agree I get too wound up- but I'm only still seething because I've just come back the same way!!

OP posts:

MorrisZapp · 08/05/2009 14:40

In any other area of life, we expect people to take responsibility for their own actions. But apparently dangerous overtaking is done not by homicidal idiots, but by people driven to it by slower drivers?

Nobody's journey is so important that they can't lose a couple of minutes rather then risk a head on collision in a risky overtake.

I won't travel to the countryside for this reason. If I go to the Highlands it has to be by train. My poor nerves simply can't cope with the horror of country roads on which everybody seems to think that the oncoming lane is their own personal speeding lane. I have seen so many near misses, it's terrifying.

And for what? Ten minutes saved on an hour long journey?

Why can't drivers just relax and accept that the roads are busy, and to allow ample time to arrive? There could be children in the oncoming car ffs.

PartOfTheHumphreysGroup · 08/05/2009 14:42

ugh it winds me up when people go at less than the speed limit. I don't mean you should hare round corners at 60mph just cos it's the limit but don't toddle along at 30 in a 40mph zone, for example.
Oh and don't slow down for a speed camera if you're already doing the correct speed! you don't get plus points for going slower!

Paolosgirl · 08/05/2009 14:43

What you've described is crap driving, not cautious driving. Cautious driving is careful driving, taken full account of road conditions. Driving way under the speed limit, changing lanes without indicating, not signalling etc is poor/crap driving, not cautious driving.

As earlier posters have said, drivers who let the 'red mist' descend when they've been held up for a period of time and then try and leg it past at the first opportunity are dangerous. And agree - if you're still wound up hours later you REALLY need to chill - or take some evening primrose!

LauriefairycakeeatsCupid · 08/05/2009 14:44

people on the motorway going at 40 are a menace and cause massive tailbacks imo

PartOfTheHumphreysGroup · 08/05/2009 14:45

I'd like to make clear that I would only overtake someone if it was v safe, prefer to sit behind them at a safe distance swearing at them

ajandjjmum · 08/05/2009 14:46

I thought it was interesting that when ds learned to drive recently, he had to show that he was confident - and safe obviously! - in a way we never did. He was told very clearly that he would be failed for driving too cautiously, or if he was much below the speed limit.

Paolosgirl · 08/05/2009 14:46

How are they dangerous on a motorway? Just overtake - you've got 2 other lanes to use!

SoupDragon · 08/05/2009 14:46

"Over-cautious drivers are a menace. They can cause those behind them to become so frustrated that they take risks."

No, the risk taking is the fault of the driver taking the risk and no one else.

Wilkiepedia · 08/05/2009 14:48

YANBU - OP

PartoftheHumphreysGroup - totally agree re people that break when they see a speed camera when travelling at or under the speed limit. Why?? Why Why Why? We have one near us, it is on a 40mph limit, everyone usually drives around 35mph ANYWAY cos it is a busy road but SO MANY people break when they see the speed camera. Drives me fricking insane.

Oh and supermarket/retail carparks. People drive round looking for a space, oblivious that there are other people driving behind them, suddenly spot a space, anchor their brakes on without looking behind, or worse still reverse without looking who is behind.

I really shouldn't drive....I get V wound up...

Kathyis6incheshigh · 08/05/2009 14:49

"ugh it winds me up when people go at less than the speed limit."

Now I find that statement really worrying. The speed limit is not a recommended speed, it's the maximum. The right speed depends on the conditions and sometimes actually you should be going at 30 in a 40 limit.

OrmIrian · 08/05/2009 14:49

Oh jooly - I so agree! Being overcautious does not mean safer. And I speak as one who spent 2.5 years driving down the only direct road to Minehead and back again. Then another 2 years driving on a route that took me up Cheddar gorge and back every day. And my day was always screwed up by people who couldn't seem to handle country roads and beleived the f*ing hedges were going to attack them!

And breathe... I do not commute anymore

Paolosgirl · 08/05/2009 14:51

If you are having to anchor on your brakes you're driving TOO CLOSE!!! Have you heard about maintaining a safe stopping distance? Imagine if a child had run out between 2 parked cars and use that as your guide to what might happen to the car in front.

Original poster

Joolyjoolyjoo · 08/05/2009 14:52

But if slow driving is safe, why did I fail my first driving test for driving at 40mph on a dual cariageway with a 70 limit (done for hesitancy)?? I'm not talking about cautious driving- I mean over cautious driving- ie behaving as if there is a hazard when there isn't.

And I NEVER do risky overtaking- which is why I get so wound up by slow drivers!! If I was prepared to just cut them up and drive like a lunatic, they wouldn't bother me!!

I accept that the roads are busy- that can't be helped. What CAN be helped is fearful/ hesitant drivers who make the situation ten times worse.

I mentioned the lane-changing thing, because I think sometimes people who drive slowly seem to think that this in itself makes them a good driver. I regularly see people driving at 40mph on a 60 road, only to continue driving at 40 when we enter a 30mph zone! I sometimes think people who are concentrating so much on their (extra-slow) speed, are not so good at really observing the road around them, secure in their belief that their "cautious" driving keeps them safe

OP posts:

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