To think that this man is a total arse?

[Ninkynork]

DH and I were upstairs moving furniture whilst watching DD aged 9 playing in the garden with my neighbour's DD aged 3. They often exchange toys through the garden fence and have a lovely time. On this occasion they were playing at having a tea party.

I came down after a few minutes to find my daughter in tears gibbering that she was only playing a pretend game that the neighbour's DD's sand was a biscuit and that she'd licked it when it was passed to her and that she was in trouble.

I sat at the back door and listened to the little girl's Dad rant and rave in a really passive-aggressive way apparently to his DD about how she shouldn't put sand in her mouth just because another kid told her to. Or stones. It was stones last time and how my DD is "bloody horrible" to her and that she should come away from the fence.

Told DH what was going on and our DD was duly scolded about how silly it is to play with a much younger child in this manner but tbh I am still fuming about how little my neighbour understands about how children play. DD did not intend any malice and was really upset. AIBU to think that a grown adult should have called out to DH and I in order to discuss it in a sensible manner?

Nice stealth work ninky! Are you in the running for the award?

He doesn't sound very nice. I would not expect DH to shout at DD if she was upset from eating some sand. And I would give the older child the benefit of the doubt (honest!) and just keep an eye out a little when there was fence action going on.

Our DD plays over the fence with some older children (well she stands and bellows "baby" in an informative fashion ) and i must admit I keep a little eye out to check they are being nice.

if they weren't, TBH I wouldn't see it as anything wrong with them as children can be nasty and it's normal IYSWIM, I would just supervise more closely when she was out there.

Your DD's playing style sounds adorable I suppose the big kid little kid thing makes for an interesting discussion. Almost like Soft-Play Rage. DH suffers terribly from that when our PFB2 DS is pushed around by the dreaded Hulking Children Over Two Who Shalt Not Be Permitted To Be In The Baby Zone!

It is terrible feeling so protective. And of course your viewpoint has to alter in accordance with the age of your own child!

I am looking forward to DD learning some more words as I suspect next doors 2 will tire of her pointing and shouting "baby" fairly soon

Hopefully when she's a bit older they can play properly, the younger one is a year older than DD, I have fantasies of them going off together on their bikes so I can have a rest get on with important things.

Out on bikes Lucky you, I daren't let DD out where I live, she is so not streetwise. Then again I'm not streetwise enough for my area they throw stones the little children here - with the parents standing on the doorsteps watching and drinking lager at ten in the morning! That's probably why I'm so keen to protest my DD's innocence and then again, maybe why my arse of a neighbour is concerned for his I suppose...

I expect by the time DD is old enough to go out on a bike I may have changed my tune somewhat!

In the meantime I'll stick to my fantasies though

Are you on friendly terms with the neighbours or is all the interaction through the children? Maybe if you be super friendly he'll calm down a bit.

or maybe he is just a cock

YANBU

It is not a proper childhood unless something completely inappropriate has been eaten.

He sounds like a passive aggressive twunt.