to get cross that people ignore emails telling them about my MMC?

[Thandeka]

A few people (good friends or so I thought) who I have decided to tell via email about my recent MMC at 10 weeks pregnant have just COMPLETELY ignored email/text about it, yet since they are fannying about on facebook etc I know they have probably got it.

I know sometimes people don't know what to say but I think leaving it longer than 24hours for a response (once you recieved email/text obv.) is just cruel. Or am I being unreasonable?

I think you are right, and your friends could have responded quicker.

However, I do think you are being a little unreasonable regarding your MIL - I'm sure any miscarraige hurts, whether the miscarriage would have been your first or hundred and first child.

Oh I really didn't mean to imply my M-I-L shouldn't hurt (or hurt less than me because her MC's were after successful pregnancies) - of course miscarriage, termination are all horribly distressing, traumatic things. What I resented was the one upmanship on grief. The attempt at empathy was appreciated but misplaced as I think in general no-body can say about anything "I know how you feel" as actually you can't ever know how someone is feeling about something unless you are that person.

Hope that clarifies.

Wb personally i would be very distressed to wait a week for a response- even a very brief text or email "I'm so sorry, thinking of you, let's talk when you are ready" is better than silence. But then you are you and know your friends, and I am me and that's how I would react, and maybe my friends who waited don't know that about me.

Perhaps I should provide a leaflet for friends and family on best way to react to me! hehe maybe taking the self absorbedness too far