to be slightly pissed of that i am being told where dd1 can and cant go by my friend?

[Marne]

My neighbours little girl is in the same year as dd1 and they are good friends (she comes over to play with dd, i have coffee with my neighbour etc..). Anyway yesterday i went and knocked on her door to see if she wanted to walk up to school with me to get the dd's, she told me her dd was staying at school to do french club, she also told me that her dd was up all night crying because she didn't want to do french. I told her my dd would enjoy french as she can already speak some french and would enjoy it, she basicly told me that she didn't want my dd to go because she wanted her dd to do it on her own so she is good at something that me dd isn't and to build her confedance.

AIBU in thinking, this is a after school club open to anyone (not just her dd) and if my dd did want to go then i will send her?

She also said that my dd is already top in the class for reading and maths so it would be nice if her dd had something that she could be good at .

My dd has Aspergers syndrome, she enjoys learning and is bright but she also has problems socializing and doing physical activities. I don't push her into learning things (i'm not a pushy mum) but she chooses to read books and solve maths puzzles. I feel a little bit sorry for her little girl as she seems to be pushing her to do things she doesn't enjoy.

AIBU?

'Maybe neighbour's dd is suffering with confidence issues and the neighbour is just trying to help her buld her confidence away from her very good friend who is good at everything she tries?'

I would have thought that this was the way to entirely knock her confidence!! After school clubs should be for fun-I think it may put her off modern languages for life. I would ignore the mother-she has the problem, not her DD. Maybe the DD just wants to do nothing after school.

My son is 5 and there is no way i would make him stay behind and do a french club if he didnt want to, and see him cry and know that i caused it?

How is it raising her confidence when she she is so dreading it, that she becomes upset. Surely there are other clubs that she would like to do?

At my kids school there are loads of after school clubs. My daughter wants to do them all, and my son couldnt care less!

Frankly its a pita to have to collect him at 3.15 and then come back for her at 4.30, but i do it because she enjoys the clubs

Oh I admit I would now change DS1 for the world, although I do sometimes wish he had a bit less of a rough time.

He would rather play chess then football, does not really get on with his peers and struggles to talk to them... put him in a room with DPs family all DRs of this and that and he will happily chat about quantum physics, pie (the math not the pudding) and all sorts of things I have no clue about, and while yes I am proud he is so smart I would just once like to see him so at ease with a group his own age talking about football. And despite having an IQ of 148 it would be really great if I did not have to try getting size 6/7 shoes with Velcro, because he can not tie laces.

Marne I think unless people have a child like this they find it strange/ threatening/ odd.

NOT