Smoking and neighbours

[TheMoistWorldOfSeptimusQuench]

It doesn't really matter now because we're moving next weekend, but anyway, I'd be grateful if the MN jury could give me their verdict on this one...

I am horrible filthy smoker, not a heavy one, but I do smoke two or three cigarettes every evening. Now obviously I'm not going to smoke in the house, so instead, I smoke in the garden. We live in a house which only has a small front garden, so that's where I sit.

The house adjoins a low block of flats, and on the top (second) floor live a family - middle aged mum & dad, and their daughter, who looks about 18.

They like to have their windows open all year round, so inevitably, this leads to problems with my smoking. Although I'm sone distance away, it seems that they can smell it. Which I agree must be horrible, but they do have the option of closing their windows. Or coming down and having mature conversation about it.

But when I light up, their chosen method of dealing with the problem is to talk very loudly about me. For example, "That disgusting old slag's at it again", and "Ugh! Fag ash lil's out..." etc etc.

When they saw the "to let" sign go up outside my house, they all leaned out of the window, singing "Celebrate good times!" as they saw me walk up the street.

I saw them today in the street and they ignored me, so I made a point of grinning broadly and saying "Hello!" in the most cheerful voice I could manage. The mother muttered "morning...", the daughter smirked and the dad suddenly became very interested in the view of the pavement.

One other mitigating factor: When the parents are out, the daughter very often has lots of friends round (who are exceptionally noisy in the way that only teenagers can be), and also has extremely loud sex with the windows open. When this happens, I close my windows (if they're open), or go inside or whatever. It's annoying, but I'm certainly not going to ask a teenager not to have sex, so live and let live.

I completely agree that the smell of smoke is vile, but in other ways, I'm a fairly good neighbour I think... we're not noisy, look in on the elderly people who live in the flats, clean up the rubbish when the bin bags have split in the street (even though it's often not ours).

So, AIBU? Are they? Or are we both?

I thank you

Well, i am gobsmacked!!! Where are the usual anti smoking mners????

In my opinion YANBU, for christsake they need to get alife.....I would be sorely tempted to mention about the daughters sexual habits

blossom - I think the common sense brigade pro-smokers just got in first

for the smoking side of the question i'm not even going there. The fact that they are being so rude eliminates any problems it may cause them IMHO. Personally tho, because of their blatant rudeness I would mention the daughters sexual antics to the parents as a bit of revenge.- possibly in a letter? the day you move out? signed fagash lil????

I loathe and detest smoking, but for heaven's sake, you are entitled to do it in your own back yard without having to put up with verbal abuse! YANBU, they are!

Just think who they could have move in next. You only smoke 2-3 in the evening - what are they going to do if chain smokers move in? Or people who cook a lot of smelling food? Or play lots of loud music? There's a high chance they'll miss you :-)

YANBU. We smoke in our front garden too, and next door always have their windows and doors open - but they're smokers so its not so bad. Think we annoyed them at 1am Saturday morning though as we had drunken conversations whilst smoking - but that happens like once a year so I think we've been forgiven.

YANBU!!!

I'd drop the daughter in it.

I would. I'd do what Fluffy or Tidey said.

How childish are we We all want to dob the daughter in lol!