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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be annoyed by some people's lack of 'playground etiquette'??

48 replies

LetThemEatCake · 26/04/2009 20:45

at the park today with my friend's partner and their daughter, plus my 2 dc.

DC1 ran towards the swings the moment we got to the playground, while I was still unstrapping DC2 from his pushchair. When I headed over to her, she had her hand on one of the swings and was asking to be put in it.

There were a few other parents/ children hanging about so I asked DC1 if it was her turn or if she had pushed in? was anyone else waiting? A mum, there with her partner and dd (who, tbh, looked too old for the baby swings) huffily said yes, we were actually, but whatever.

I said, not at all, my daughter can wait her turn and explained (not for the 1st time) to DC1 about waiting, not pushing in etc etc. In the meantime, my friends' child was whining to go on the swing too and friend gave her the same spiel.

So we waited for a bit (only 2 swings you see, and there was another little boy ahead of us too - his father had been very chilled about it though) and then encouraged our 3 dcs to go and play on the climbing frame/ slide.

Meanwhile, a good few people went on swing 2, but the couple and their daughter kept a firm hold of swing 1.

20 minutes passed and it was time to get the kids home for dinner. But they weren't leaving without a swing. So we headed back over. One swing was free but the couple still had their daughter on the other.

So we announced that all 3 were going to get to have a turn and then we had to go. So the couple stood there and kept pushing their daughter while each of our 3 kids had a tiny turn on the other swing, one after another. Meanwhile a new queue formed behind us.

AIBU to be really annoyed by this? Honestly - warm day, playground rammed with kids - should you really hog the swing for near on 30 minutes????

OP posts:

traceybath · 26/04/2009 22:17

Royal Victoria Park in Bath - a child's version of heaven and my personal version of hell

Confuzzeled · 26/04/2009 22:19

I hate swing hogs, and it's always the swings isn't it. There's a huge park near me that has loads of big kid swings but only 2 baby swings. There's always at least one being taken up by a swing hogger. I just think that some people don't care and they'll pass those traits onto their kids.

ThingOne · 26/04/2009 22:19

You are sooooo wrong, Tracy. It is a fantastic place. There are better parks but we don't share those without The Knowledge.

traceybath · 26/04/2009 22:22

I like Alice Park best - much nicer, can now get a decent cup of coffee there and they have the sweet little cycle track.

But even better was the tiny park in my old village which hardly anyone used so i could sit and read magazine whilst ds1 played on whatever he wanted - bliss.

ThingOne · 26/04/2009 22:28

Don't tell 'em, keep it a secret. That's the localyokel's park. We don't want any nasty tourists in there, do we? Have not been to new cafe yet.

We have a great playground in our village too. But no cafe, so have to take my own pot of coffee!

Yurtgirl · 26/04/2009 22:31

As a lot of you seem to live near Bath - what is the name of the park/playground in Bath that is beside a main road - with masses of play equipment?

I used to go past it on a bus (before I had kids!) and think it looked great (although busy)

traceybath · 26/04/2009 22:33

I'm guessing the Royal Victoria Park.

Yurtgirl · 26/04/2009 22:38

I see, the one you were all talking about earlier - thanks TracyBath

I think you are jolly fortunate to have so many parks to choose from! Im jealous - the park in our town is rubbish frankly - and it all goes downhill from there!

Original poster

LetThemEatCake · 26/04/2009 22:40

hmph, my little 'incident' took place on Peckham Rye. very near East Dulwich. East Dulwich!!! how many of you know about East Dulwich?

OP posts:

tclanger · 26/04/2009 22:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Merrylegs · 26/04/2009 22:50

Ha- used to live in Peckham Rye so oh yes, I know...

Perchance their child, being, as you say, a little too (ahem) large for the baby swings was in fact STUCK in said swing and her poor parents were too ashamed to admit their faux pas, and general pants parenting skills .

So, to save face they just kept swinging - and swinging - and - swinging.

(Nip back now. I bet they are still there.)

MintyyAeroEgg · 26/04/2009 22:52

Ooooooh, what does "how many of you know about East Dulwich? mean LetThem?
I spend half my life in Peckham Rye or Dulwich Parks .

Original poster

LetThemEatCake · 26/04/2009 23:03

me too Minty!!!

East Dulwich ... it's just so, ugh, so self-righteously, earnestly mummified!!

Like, thou shalt only feed thy child Organix rice cakes but then be too busy texting on iPhone to notice when said child nicks another child's Green & black chocolate bar.

Like, thou shalt only use Moltex nappies because they are biodegradable darling, but let's not bother to use nappy liners - let's just put the poo in the bin - and then let's put said nappy in non-biodegradable plastic bag.

how old are your dc Minty? do we know each other???

OP posts:

MintyyAeroEgg · 26/04/2009 23:13

8 and 5, so I don't think so LetThem.

Last week I was a little bit hungover under the weather and fancied a full English breakfast. So I took myself off to Dulwich Park caff because I do like their bacon and sausages, and the place was literally heaving with the dulwich mum-types you describe. I didn't notice it so much when I used to go with the children before they were at school/nursery - I suppose because I was usually with friends (nice normal East Dulwich types lol!) and didn't have the time to spend people watching.

Wells Park in Sydenham is very nice. And Brockwell too of course. And there's a sweet little playground and duck pond just up the road from North Dulwich station in Herne Hill if you know it?

MrsMerryHenry · 26/04/2009 23:19

30 mins on a swing sounds a long time to me, letthemeatcake. Are you sure they didn't take her off while you weren't looking and then put her on again later? Or were you watching them like a hawk?

Original poster

LetThemEatCake · 26/04/2009 23:35

like a hawk MrsMerryHenry!!! A hawk I tell you!!!

Minty - I don't go to Dulwich Park cafe any more, just can't bear it. A shame, as it is such a pretty park. But the women who think it's okay to change their kids nappies on the floor of the indoor play area, the lousy coffee ...

I do go to Peckham Rye quite a lot though ... doesn't seem to be quite so bad, today might have been an exception ... either that or, as I say, I am super-snarky due to being pregnant and will find fault with everything and everyone!!

OP posts:

MrsMerryHenry · 26/04/2009 23:44

youhavegottobekidding · 27/04/2009 14:11

same thing happened to me yesterday! I was teaching my DD nice manners - she ran up to the swing just as a younger girl arrived at the swing the same time as her. The other swing was being pushed by doting grandparents. So I said to the mum with the wee girl who had been wanting a shot at the same time, that my DD would go on for a minute then she could have a go. She was fine about it. But while I was pushing the swing and loudly saying that she'd have to be quick as other people were waiting, it dawned on me that doting grandparents had obviously been pushing their granddaugther for a good few minutes - they were there before us, and showed no signs of leaving. Wouldn't it have been better manners for them to vacate the other swing to let both newincomers have a go ??? I have no pregnancy hormones to blame....

MadamDeathstare · 27/04/2009 14:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2rebecca · 27/04/2009 14:28

Why don't you say something? My kids are older now, but when they were younger if I thought someone, adult or child was hogging a swing or other toy I'd ask if my child could have a turn. It seems daft to be annoyed by something but not say anything.
When the queue formed I would have said something to the couple, if there was a queue of people they'd have looked very churlish saying "no, other children can't have a go, we want to hog it"
So no UANBU to be annoyed but UABU to not say anything and just moan, very passive aggressive. The worst thing that could have happened was that they said no.

oldraver · 28/04/2009 17:07

Oooh it never fails to amaze me how selfish/thick some parents are. We arrived at the park a while ago to find both swings occupied, one mother pushing both children. Dsbusied himself with other things but eventually headed for the swings. We did have a bit of a wait and DS had got a bit er vocal, cue me "you have to wait your turn" speech hoping Mum would realise she had been hogging BOTH swings for over 20 mins. She did eventually begrudgingly give up a swing for DS then I realised that only ONE child was hers. The other child appeared to have been abandoned.

Ds had only been on swing 5 mins when I was asked huffily "can my child now have a go". I did say yea sure, but you could ask mother of this child who appears to have been abandoned to give up a swing". We were there a further 20 mins and child was STILL on swing when we left. I did realise whose child it was as eventually the childs own mother had to make the effort of pushing when there was no willing helper to do it

Original poster

LetThemEatCake · 28/04/2009 17:17

I forgot to mention that the dad relieved himself in the bushes while mum continued to push the daughter!! with his back to all the kids, but still!!!!!

OP posts:

MrsMerryHenry · 28/04/2009 21:23

In the playground as well? Dirty beast.

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