You know you're a true mumsnetter when...

[LolaTheShowgirl]

...you wince at seeing a girl give her 9 month old daughter a bottle of fruitshoot on the bus (to self-feed too)!

You give advice in RL as if you are posting on MN!

When you wake sleeping DH at 3am to tell him you read on MN that Grace Jones hd died, excep it it was all a dream, the more of the dream you remember the more you realise it was just reading and posting on random threads, and neither of you even like Grace Jones anyway.

WTF?????????

Hee! Peachy. I had a terrible snob-attack about fruit-shoots at a birthday party. Tried to steer my daughter towards her water beaker discreetly!

They were all lined up on the food table - two each!

I did feel like a b&*%$@d, though.

I'm a bit upset about the fact that I don't know what 'gavel' means.

Can somebody help?

when you get genuinely upset about a total stranger's problems and keep your dh up late discussing what advice to give

someone recently came back last thing at night, to check whether my dh got made redundant or not - it meant soooooo much to me that someone cared that much (and a lovely reminder that we do all actually exist outside the computer screen...)

potato- a gavel is the little wooden hammer used by auctioneers and, more importantly, judges. If that helps.

he he that's funny nickschick , oh how I love stardrops.

In most RL conversations you pipe up 'I know someone that did that/went there/that happened to/etc etc etc'

What stage am I at? - I think all the other MN names are way better than mine and wish I'd chosen a cooler one that would look better in print .

Ahhh thanks duchesse, that does help.

Furball, I do that all the time

what are fruitshoots?

I knew I was spending too much time here when DH said something funny the other night, and instead of laughing, I said 'snort'.

Won't be living that one down for a while.

OK, I'm a new (but aspiring) MNetter so be gentle with me - I get Mooncup and now Gavel (thankyou duchesse) and I think I can guess Snurk but what does Boak mean?

Boak means to vomit.

when you have seen and commented on threads with this title more than 4 times

When you are talking to health proffesionals.. and you justify your worries by saying.. " i don't think i'm being unreasonably pfb about it all* oooop

Thanks OldLadyKnowsNothing Thought that might be it but wasn't sure

When anything happens in your life you think about how you would structure your MN post on it.

E.g. me lying in bed last night at 1am listening to the next door neighbour revving their car engine, testing their stereo and horn, and starting my train of thought with 'am I being unreasonable to think..'

I don't actually post very many of them - it just sometimes helps enough to have organised the problem in my head sufficiently to be able to write it out/explain to someone else, then I don't actually have to IYSWIM.

When you write an email to a friend and use the MN emoticons which obviously do not work on emails....so you type a sentence and it kinda looks like this [ blush] [ smile]

Oh yes greensleeves I know that one about discussing strangers problems with DH, talking it over and being genuinely concerned.....and also using MN examples in RL "Oh, I know someone that happened to" then having to pretend you can't remember as you don't want to mention MN seeing as it is (for me) a kind of secret club that you don't want RL acquaintances to know about

HolyGuacamole - I do that and then DH goes 'oh who was that then' and I go all vague and clearly people think I was making it up. He has done it loads of times, even though he knows I don't want to mix RL and MN.

When you snigger at the showergel named 'fanjo' in your friend's bathroom (not in the uk).

Ladyglencora - rofl! I was telling a friend about the 'most dangerous cake in the world' and she was like "where did you find out about that recipe?" and I'm like "oh, just a magazine" and now I am worried incase she googles it and finds MN....arrrgghh

DH is similarly warned not to mention MN to anyone

you recognise other MNetters on Facebook cos they talk about DH/MIL/...