To want this person to act differently (work situation)

[laza222]

Someone (more senior than me) said today: 'I heard that you are leaving early for a drs appointment again'.

It was the 'again' that got to me, as though he was saying 'FFS, you have another appointment'.

In the past three weeks I have had two doctors appointments prior to this one. In between I was also very ill with a throat infection/fever thing (there were what the appointments were for) and still came into work (despite losing my voice and feeling like crap), because I want to make the right impression to people I work with. Meanwhile there has been one person off for 3 days with a chest infection and another person off on two separate occasions for two different illness things.

Am I being unreasonable to think that this person shouldn't comment on the fact I have a doctors appointment, particularly not in front of other people? He was waiting for a piece of work from me, which I was rushing to complete and was about to speak to him about.

I am quite possibly being unreasonable as I am overly sensitive but it just doesn't seem fair. I don't want to be ill (trust me) and can't help that this year I have been ill. It's not like I have had much time off in the past. I started just under a year ago and had one day off sick since then.

I also come in about 45 minutes early each day and don't always take all my lunch break. I made sure I was in this mornign just to make up for the appointment.

I think it depends on how it was said/ intentioned. It could be well-intentioned (trying to ask if you are okay or trying to establish if you will be around to do some aspect of the work) or it could be an implied criticism. Dont feel guilty - by the sound of it you are soldiering on a bit too bravely!

Thanks. I'm probably just being over sensitive. I know I have a habit of doing that!!!

I suppose there have been other things too. For e.g. I was late one day by quite a significant amount of time due to a six car pile up. it also caused someone else to be late, someone else had passed over the road and seen it on their way and also it was all over the local news. He made a remark then that implied that if I wasn't careful I would get sacked! He phrased it as a word of warning and he has seen other people gone for similar things.

I guess this person just concerns me and their intentions.

On a social level, I quite like him. But on a work level I just think that he is a bit unfair/inappropriate!

I don't know. I am sure I am being silly. Thanks for the response.

depends really, obviously you are in a work environment where personal things aren't meant to affect the workplace. i.e own time for drs appts etc -
have you checked with hr re:policy, also you have been with this company for less than a year , been late for work , left work early twice for personal issues, and had an episode of sickness.....
see how a manager can put a different spin on things?
I suspect he is trying to politely warn you off a little bit?
as for other peoples sickness record its really none of your business is it?

Thanks Hotbot.

I agree, other people's sickness records is none of my business. However surely a policy should be fair and equal for people?!

HR policy regarding sickness is to call in sick each day of sickness and provide a sicknote if off for each day after.

I have been late for work on one occassion which is incredibly odd for me considering (as I said in my first post) I get in approximately 45 minutes early each day. In addition, I work through my lunchbreaks quite often or don't take all lunch break and take work home.

Something I think which goes against me is that I tell people when I think I MIGHT be late due to traffic/accident or whatever! E.g. As soon as it looks as though I was going to be late, I would text to tell them. Actually on all but that one occasion when I was late, I arrived on time but I was brought up polite and considerate so thought it best to tell people as soon as you think there may be a problem. I have since stopped this as I was concerned that it might go against me.

So I guess what I'm saying Hotbot is that I am used to being in situations where I work hard and give more and in return the company I work for are willing to give more when neccesary.

I also want to add that I have ended up cancelling a hospital appointment and not pursuing a health problem because I didn't want it to look bad that I would have to take the time off.

Sorry, meant to say call in for first 5 days and then provide

Oh...and also that I don't usually have such poor health usually. I had one day off in 3 years at my last job.

Also the person who possibly has a problem with me is not my manager, I work on some jobs he works on.

Sorry, meant to say call in for first 5 days and then provide

Oh...and also that I don't usually have such poor health usually. I had one day off in 3 years at my last job.

Also the person who possibly has a problem with me is not my manager, I work on some jobs he works on.

What other people are doing isn't relevant - you don't say you have any reason to think they are not following the policy correctly, and presumably you don't know what comments may or may not have been made to them?

It sounds as though you are being a bit oversensitive tbh, unless there's a lot more to it. He had heard you would be leaving early for an appointment and was simply stating that as a fact, or checking it was correct, for whatever reason. If you are doing some work for him it's reasonable for him to be aware of that.

I can't see that telling people when you might be late could 'go against' you either. What negative thing has happened as a result of you telling someone that you might be late? Why would you think that would 'go against' you?

Maybe the telling them I may be late thing is me being very paranoid! It's just that I I had text to say I may be late (actually arrived 10 minutes early which is late for me!) and then the following day was the six car pile up and when he made the comment, which just made me wonder.

what annoyed me that day was that my line manager knew and said it was fine. He knew that it was beyond my control and that usually I am very early usually. But then this other person made the comment and as it transpired, he was 15-20 minutes late that day, due to a separate accident and then 2.5 hours late due to an accident the following week!!!

I expect I am being silly and thank you for the perspective.

I guess I am just having a pretty bad year and worry at the best of times. It feels as though since starting this job my personal life has had one incident/tragedy/drama after another and there isn't anythign I can do about it!

If your line manager is fine, knows all the ins and outs, and is happy that you are reliable, that's the important thing. This other person sounds like a minor irritation, just try not to let him get to you and not to over-interpret his comments.

Sorry you're having a bad year more generally. I know it's hard but sometimes if things aren't going well it's easy to project a negative perspective on the smallest thing, which it sounds as though you might be doing.

agree with flowery, sounds like youve had a tough time, hope things improve for you
xx

Thanks Flowerbeanbag (I love your name by the way). I probably am over reacting and I know I'm feeling low at the moment about all the rubbishness!

I guess I just need to focus on staying positive. I know I work better when I am happy, as do most people I think!

I'll try to stop being negative now! And just battle through anymore stupid illness!

Next Am I being Unreasonable: To wish that everyone I work with had caught what I had last week because it made me feel awful!!!

Thanks Hotbot.

I'm off to be more positive now and to stop moaning!