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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to want my flipping maternity clothes back????

11 replies

LetThemEatCake · 21/04/2009 12:40

I loaned a friend all my mat clothes from dc2 last year. I'm now 18 weeks pregnant with dc3 and am STILL waiting for my stuff back!!

Her baby was born last Oct and mine is due Sept so it's not as if the clothing I gave her is out-of-season - it's spring/ summer stuff and I need it!

She has known that I am pg since 10 weeks (bump was impossible to hide, think that's the case when you;ve already had a few babies?) and has not made any move to get my clothes back to me.

Bear in mind she lives about a 5-10 min walk away and has only 1 child, while I have 2 (a 2yo and a 1yo) so for her, dropping them off is a matter of sticking the bub in the pram and meandering down the road - for me it's a bit more of a mission.

PLUS she has all her family constantly coming down to 'help' with the baby while mine all live o/s. My point being that if it's too much hassle to leave the house with the baby, then she could leave it sleeping or playing with grandparents and quickly nip down to mine.

She actually did come over the other day and say "i've got so much stuff of yours to return but I figured these might be the most urgent for now" and handed me two flipping baby name books!! (originally came free with a magazine LOL)

I've mentioned several times that I need to get the stuff back and she has been super-flakey. Today she texted to say "can't do it this week as my parents are down until Friday but I will try to get it all together in a bag for your while the are here and maybe see you next week?"

Yes, okay, I could just march up to her house and ferret through her wardrobes and get it myself but really, should I have to? Is it not her responsibility to get them back to me?

We also loaned her a baby rocker, cradle, car seat, slings, bath, baby clothes .... should I assume that my new baby is going to be sleeping in bed with us until she gets her sh*t together to return all of it??? Or might I actually get it back before September??

AIBU?

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 21/04/2009 12:42

make a time, ask her to package everything up (inclduing equipment) and take your car

problem solved

LetThemEatCake · 21/04/2009 12:42

sorry did not realise I had ranted on quite so much - now that IS unreasonable.

OP posts:
LetThemEatCake · 21/04/2009 12:42

car? what car?

OP posts:
Auntylulu · 21/04/2009 12:42

she has either sold it or damaged it to the point she is not able to give it back

or she is a super flake

either way YANBU

if her parents are with her until friday , she can leave her DC with them whislt she makes the short trip to you

bit odd to return the books but not the stuff you actually need!!

Tillyscoutsmum · 21/04/2009 12:43

Definitely not being unreasonable..

I'm really non confrontational so would probably be the same as you but you need to get tough. Maybe text and say been as her parents are here, she'll get chance to sort everything out and make firm arrangements to meet up Monday next week to get them

rubyslippers · 21/04/2009 12:43

oh, i thought you had a car

if not, then as Lulu says her parents can watch the children whilst she drops them off

traceybath · 21/04/2009 12:44

Do you know i think i'd just pop by and knock on her door this week and say 'just passing - do you have my clothes sorted at all as i'm absolutely desperate as bursting out of all my normal clothes' and at this point stick your bump out as far as possible.

In fact if necessary shove a cushion up your top to make the point.

This is why i generally hate lending things to people as you end up feeling in the wrong and embarassed just for wanting back what is yours!

LetThemEatCake · 21/04/2009 12:45

sorry, yes we do have a car but dh uses it for work and works until late at night, often weekends too.

She has a car for her personal use, however...

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 21/04/2009 12:46

even better - get her to pick you up and drop you back then!

YANBU by the way ... how aggravating

WelshSuprise · 21/04/2009 12:52

Personally I think shes either ruined your clothes or sold them as a previous poster has already said.

When you gave them to your friend, was she aware that you wanted them back ?

BunnyLebowski · 21/04/2009 12:56

Precisely why I don't lend anything to anyone but immediate family!

On a practical level she is being BANG out of order.

If I were you I would take the kids out for a walk, go to hers and ask her outright for the stuff.

Then get a taxi home with the stuff.

I wouldn't stand for being messed around in this kind of situation. Bottom line is it's YOUR stuff that you paid good money for.

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