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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'So, are you hoping for a yes or a no?'

61 replies

hmmSleep · 20/04/2009 15:54

This is what the check-out man at Asda asked after examining the pregnancy test I had hid amongst my groceries.

AIBU to thibk it was highly innapropriate for him to mention it at all, never mind ask what result I was hoping for?

Luckily I'm not easily embarrassed, andwas hoping for a positive, so not as awkward as it could have been.

I didn't complain as didn't want to get the man into trouble, he didn't mean any harm, was just a bit gormless. Now I'm wondering if I should? Perhaps all staff should be briefed not to ask customers inappropriate questions about their shopping?

I'm certainly shan't be buying any lube etc from there!

OP posts:
ellingwoman · 20/04/2009 16:55

Use a chemist?

Agree with choc - just trying to be chatty

MuffinBaker · 20/04/2009 16:56

I think people are going ott tbh.

It just means there might be a new baby coming and that is just (mostly) lovely news and people like to show interest.

Many years ago I worked in a shop and I told the lady who was buying one "I hope you get the result you want" she said nothing and I never commented again when selling a hpt, but it was hardly a hige insult.

UKVeggieMum · 21/04/2009 06:50

I bought a jar a pasta sauce in M&S yesterday

(Honestly I do usually buy my own and freeze it, but we've run out and needed a quick tea),

anyway the lady at the check out commented that she had a large homemade batch in her fridge at home - judged for buying a jar of sauce.

I do find check out staff often over step the mark, just to make conversation.

UKVeggieMum · 21/04/2009 06:51

I bought a jar a pasta sauce in M&S yesterday

(Honestly I do usually buy my own and freeze it, but we've run out and needed a quick tea),

anyway the lady at the check out commented that she had a large homemade batch in her fridge at home - judged for buying a jar of sauce.

I do find check out staff often over step the mark, just to make conversation.

UKVeggieMum · 21/04/2009 06:51

I bought a jar a pasta sauce in M&S yesterday

(Honestly I do usually buy my own and freeze it, but we've run out and needed a quick tea),

anyway the lady at the check out commented that she had a large homemade batch in her fridge at home - judged for buying a jar of sauce.

I do find check out staff often over step the mark, just to make conversation.

LibrasJusticeLeagueofBiscuits · 21/04/2009 07:19

"check out staff over step the mark"
"he didn't mean any harm, was just a bit gormless."

I can't imagine a check out job is the most exciting job in the world in itself and so they tried to make conversation, but they are not actually your servants and they were just trying to be friendly, maybe brightening both your and their day. Complaining would be very OTT and maybe the staff will stop talking to people whose only conversation is at the check out till.

Original poster
hmmSleep · 21/04/2009 08:17

Libras I have actually worked on a check out whilst I was a student (be it 15 yrs ago), so am totally aware of both sides and most certainly do not consider them my servant, actually quite offended at you implying I do!

This particular check out assistant, in my opinion, did make an inappropriate comment, in a slightly gormless way, what if I was incredibly worried about the result? As it is I did get a disappointing negative result and hopefully will be needeing to by another test in the future, which due to this man I shan't be buying from Asda. All that said, as I posted earlier I had already decided not to complain.

OP posts:
spenthen · 21/04/2009 13:41

They shouldn't say anything. I once had to buy one to confirm that my mc had been complete and I definitely wasn't pg any more. When the assistant asked "if I thought I was or not", it wasn't a great moment for either of us.

If assistants are required to handle pharmaceutical/medical items, they should be trained to use a corresponding level of discretion in respect of these items. That's surely not unreasonable is it?

traceybath · 21/04/2009 13:43

I've had comments from asda check-out man too.

Think he was trying to be friendly but just didn't get it quite right.

Bonneville · 21/04/2009 13:55

There have been a few comments on this thread that check out staff are just trying to be friendly/trying to alleviate the boredom. But isnt it the case that they are told they HAVE to make conversation with every customer? This seems to be the case in my local Sainsburys. To be honest Im sure it must drive them mad having to do this and they must sometimes be at a loss as to what to talk about.

TheButterflyEffect · 21/04/2009 13:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

abraid · 21/04/2009 14:16

You use extra large tampons, do you? You must be a big girl, then!

Do those ridges on the condoms work? I've never tried them with my wife.

There's a special on the pile cream, if you think you'll be getting more of them. Two for one!

nappyaddict · 21/04/2009 14:38

I've had a good luck and hope you get the result you want. Would people seriously be offended by those? I thought it was quite pleasant.

vess · 21/04/2009 15:41

Leave the poor guy alone, he has such a boring job anyway!

TheProfiteroleThief · 21/04/2009 15:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gateau · 21/04/2009 15:54

He shouldn't have done it, but he was probably just trying to be friendly; which makes a change from the po-faced assistants who usually serve me.
I wouldn't complain about him if I was you.

Saltire · 21/04/2009 15:55

I wouldn't have been too bothered TBH. Slightly off topic but we had a woman who came into our shop every month and bought 4 HPTs. After about 6 months of this she said to me one day "I've been trying to concieve for about 4 years, I buy these every month and every month I get a negative, do you think I should just stop, do you all look at me in a pitying way, and think I'm just pathetic".
Then she started crying, it turned out her colleagues at work had said to her that day "off to buy those tests again are you, why don't you just give up"
She was in such a state I had to take her into the consulting room to calm down. I told her no one on the staff took pity on her,or thought she was pathetic and we never comment what customers buy, and her and i had a chat for a good 10 minutes.
Anyway I'm waffling, a couple of months later she came in and asked for me, and she told me she was pregnant. I've since sold her countless packs of nappies, breast pads, bottles,and baby food. She brought the baby in on her first trip out with her (a little girl called Rosie) to let me see her.

MuffinBaker · 21/04/2009 15:57
Grin
elfinblast · 21/04/2009 16:13

I think they should be told not to say anything, even if they are just being friendly. If you think you are pregnant, and really don't want to be its hard enough to go and buy the test, without nudge nudge wink wink comments at the checkout.

Many small town stores are full of local staff and I know for a fact that some of the checkout staff comment about what people they know buy. (Recent conversation:
Oy Elfie, you live down the road from Brenda don't you?
Er...Yes...
cue 5 minutes wittering about how Brenda only buys own brand products and lots of chips )

I bought my PT's from ebay. Much cheaper anyway

TsarChasm · 21/04/2009 16:19

at ProfiteroleThief's poor dh. I mean blimey!!

TheProfiteroleThief · 21/04/2009 18:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Baisey · 21/04/2009 19:23

OP YANBU, if you felt it was unreasonable the you have every right to.
Saltire, thats a lovely story.
I work in a high street store, I love chatting with my regs we talk about all number of things and it brightens up the day, it would be awful to just serve customers in silence and be done with it.
However I dont sell "sensitive" items such as PT, probably a good thing actually I could just imagine myself saying a cheery "good luck" Im not the most tactile person. Foot often is placed in mouth...

Notalone · 21/04/2009 19:31

Saltire - that is a truly lovely story

emmabemmasmom · 21/04/2009 19:35

YANBU.

I have had people comment on condoms, pg tests, lube you name it...which I find v. v. weird...

And, at the Next sale I bought a size 20 sweater as it was only £5 and I was pg and thinking ahead that I wanted something big and comphy...and the check out girl was all...you know this is a size 20 right?

OK, so it was nice that I didn't look like a size 20 but still, some people don't look as big as they are and well don't comment on my size thank you! Turns out the top was a little tight after 8 months of baby growing so now I feel sad lol

Better to comment on the weather than what is in your basket I think.

YanknCock · 21/04/2009 19:44

Saltire, that's so lovely. A clerk at the pharmacy came around the counter to hug me a few weeks ago because I was a miserable sobbing wreck. Poor lady, all she did was ask 'do you pay for your prescriptions?' and I wailed 'No....because I'm pregnant and it's horrible and I'm sick all the time, and then I pee myself (gesturing at the Tena Ladys)'.