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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to refuse to let DD "have Mumsnet" when she becomes a mother?

28 replies

Hassled · 15/04/2009 22:23

On the basis that I will still be a mother myself? And we don't really do sharing?

She's 19, so we've got a good few years to argue this out. But youngest DC is only 6, so I'll be needing MN myself for a good while. He already has fine potential to become a nightmare teenager.

So who gets Mumsnet? You decide.

OP posts:
SimpleAsABC · 15/04/2009 22:24

Share and name change.

Tryharder · 15/04/2009 22:25

Finders keepers

norksinmywaistband · 15/04/2009 22:25

Does se know your posting name? if she doesn't, does sharing really come into it. We are all anonomous posters after all

norksinmywaistband · 15/04/2009 22:25

And I have obviously drunk too much wine tonight Spelling is awful

TrillianAstra · 15/04/2009 22:27

Poor DD, she might NEED mumsnet more than you!

Namechanging is key. Tell everyone who you are secretly.

Obviously you'll need to know her posting name!

squilly · 15/04/2009 22:30

Noooo...Trillian. Wouldn't it be a bit like reading your dd's diary? You should NEVER know her posting name. You both need to become anonymous faces on a mothering thread. And if you see her and recognise her from her posts WALK AWAY!!!!

I'm glad (for once) that I'm an old fart and will be posting on nannynet by the time dd has kids, even if she starts very, very young!

Original poster
Hassled · 15/04/2009 22:30

She knows my posting name. Don't see why I should have to namechange because it's MINE.

Tryharder is right - finders keepers.

She says this isn't a fair fight. My view is that she's not on MN and I am. Ha!

OP posts:
Original poster
Hassled · 15/04/2009 22:30

She knows my posting name. Don't see why I should have to namechange because it's MINE.

Tryharder is right - finders keepers.

She says this isn't a fair fight. My view is that she's not on MN and I am. Ha!

OP posts:
TrillianAstra · 15/04/2009 22:31

So in your plan Hassled she will get pregnant, secretly join MN (or even join first and go on the TTC threads) and she will know your name andyou won't know hers?

KatyMac · 15/04/2009 22:32

Can't you use this as a tool to reinforce your parenting techniques on her?

Because we will all back you up

Original poster
Hassled · 15/04/2009 22:37

No no no - you don't get it. She's not allowed to join. She has to join NetMums and get a fluffy ticker.

But thank you Katy for the back-up. I can see the squabbles now -

DDofHassled: "Should I call my first born Petunia Petal?"
Hassled: "No you can't"
The rest of MN: I agree with Hassled"

OP posts:
theyoungvisiter · 15/04/2009 22:40

but Hassled, how will you know if she joins

I mean, she knows your posting name, but you won't know hers, will you?

She'll just have to change her DD to a DS or whatever, and alter the birth date by a day or two, and you will be forever wondering why that AIBU thread sounds eerily familiar.

theyoungvisiter · 15/04/2009 22:42

One day it will pop up Hassled - "AIBU to keep my mumsnetting secret from my controlling mother MIL?"

And you will be thinking hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

monkeypinkmonkey · 15/04/2009 22:42

lol thats it isn't it Hassled you will never know!

Original poster
Hassled · 15/04/2009 22:43

She's going to show up on one of those "Mothers, eh?" rant threads, isn't she. It will be hideous.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hassled · 15/04/2009 22:43

X posts

OP posts:
ThingOne · 15/04/2009 22:44

Is she trying to tell you something, hassled?

RustyBear · 15/04/2009 22:48

Well my DD (also 19) is also on Mumsnet sometimes - she's given the teenager's viewpoint on some threads, and she once came on to defend a poster who was being accused of being a troll. I was very because someone said 'great post rustycub' - I have never got 'great post' on MN!

She knows my posting name which means I don't post anything I wouldn't want her to read (well, not under that name anyway )

Original poster
Hassled · 15/04/2009 22:51

Rusty - now I can see how that would be very galling indeed. Great post, btw .

thingone - the thought did cross my mind, but no. One thing I don't have to fret about just yet.

OP posts:
2rebecca · 15/04/2009 23:06

I presume she doesn't live with you and has her own house and computer if she has a family. Surely she can do what she likes, that's part of being an adult. If I was her I'd use it if I wanted, inventing a few irrelevent details so you can't guess all her postings.
You don't have to "share" mumsnet. You can both use it, just like you can both use Google. I really don't get your attitude.

rattyrouge · 12/06/2009 21:31

i maintain if you can facebook stalk me i can mumsnet stalk you right back.

BitOfFun · 12/06/2009 21:44

Have a glass of wine 2rebecca

katiestar · 12/06/2009 21:45

I wouldn't want my DIL to be a MNer .MILs can do no right on this site !!

chipmonkey · 12/06/2009 22:07

JoolsToo and GDG co-existed quite happily on MN for a while. I thought it was lovely. I can't imagine my Mum being on MN!

RustyBear · 13/06/2009 00:44

hi ratty - yes you can, but not when you're supposed to be revising

Though you could always try asking on here about reproductive effort and value, there are quite a few psychologists around.....