... to have deleted my half sisters and brother off my Facebook...

[myfacespacetwitterbook]

... because I can't bear to see pictures of them with my Dad and stepmother, looking like the perfect model family when I know he's a cowardly twat?

And because I can't bear to read endless status updates about how great Dad is for taking them to NY for his 60th or redecorating for them, when he hasn't even sent a CARD, never mind a present, congratulating me on the birth of DD (his granddaughter)?

And to think if they even try to contact me about deleting them I'm going tell them everything, about how their parents affair broke up our very young family, and how his new kids replaced his original family, and how he turned up at our door one day saying he didn't want to see us anymore as his new wife couldn't cope with her new kids and us as well, and we had to watch him driving round town in Mercs and BMWs and living in huge sprawling detached houses while we struggled in a council house?

BASTARD.

I sound bitter, don't I?

(name changed btw)

I do not think UABU at all.
If I were you I would have told them why you were deleting them before you did it and put it as my status for all to see as well, but then I am a first class bitch.

YANBU for feeling the way you do. I agree with kimi I would of said something to them aswell, something along the lines "I know its not your fault, blah blah, cant bear to see how he treats you so differently etc"
(does that makes sense??)

YANBU and I would let them know exactly why.

Will they even care though? He's their Dad, in their eyes he's great, he's a fantastic Grandad to their kids, and their "hero".

"Grandad Grumps", apparently, according to the FB photos.

My DP calls him "Grandad Cunt".

Lol at DP's name...could you not have tagged him as that before deleting them as a parting shot?

You do sound understandably bitter but why fall out with your half-siblings about something that is not their fault?

Can understand why it hurts but it's kind of not their fault.

I think you need to get it off your chest by writing a letter to your dad telling him how you feel.

I totally understand where you are coming from, except that I was lucky enough to have a close relationship with my Dad until he died. Sadly, when he became ill, and after his death, his wife has been a real b*^%ch. Refusing to tell us where his ashes are, refusing to have any sort of memorial for him ( something that was extremely important to him) and all sorts of other dubious activities. Always justified with ' it's what your dad would have wanted', or ' it was your dad's dying wish'. Well, I was with him when he died and i know what his dying wish was. To have had all those dying wishes, he would have had to start dying 20 years ago! And my half brother just goes along with it all. Like you, there are times when I want to shout at him about his slut of a mother who offered herself on a plte to my dad (as well as half the town) and now acts as though she is so superior to us, what is so superior about leaving two babies behind to run off with the man who got you pregnant?

Yes, I too sound bitter, because I am. So I do understand you and even though I know it is not the fault of my half brother, just as what happened to you is not the fault of your half siblings, indirectly, they did cause the problems you had with your Dad. If they ask, I would tell them, not nastily, but I would tell them because what they need to understand, is how unbelievably hurtful this situation is for the children who are left behind.

To "fall out" with them would imply that I have a relationship with them to begin with. I don't, really. I never even knew that the youngest (HS2) was born until she was 4 years old and I bumped into my stepmother with her, saw she looked like me and put two and two together. She's 19 now. I've met her twice.

They added me on FB, I accepted because I have nothing against them, as such. I thought they'd been wanting to build a relationship with me. I hadn't seen the older two in years.

I met up with my HB in a pub. He's 29 now. It was a really awkward meeting. He was incredibly hungover and spent the whole time texting. We didn't have a lot to talk about.

HS1, now 27, has emailed a few times, with comments like "I've shown Dad your pictures. He says you're really pretty and you look like HS2". No, HS2 looks like ME.

This is why I've deleted them. It feels like I'm having my nose rubbed in it, though I'm sure that's not their intention.

If we had a great relationship in the first place I'd be able to get past it, but they're strangers to me. I was never invited on days out with them when we were kids, or to their birthday parties. I was never given the chance to get to know them, nor they me.

I think then that YANBU to delete them but you would be being unreasonable to "tell them everything, about how their parents affair broke up our very young family, and how his new kids replaced his original family, and how he turned up at our door one day saying he didn't want to see us anymore as his new wife couldn't cope with her new kids and us as well, and we had to watch him driving round town in Mercs and BMWs and living in huge sprawling detached houses while we struggled in a council house?"

beacause it's still not their fault.

Delete them, get on with your life. Don't send them any kind of letter or explanation.

It's not their fault though is it?

How awful for you. I think it is better for your sanity to delete them. Is it possible for you to write a letter to your Dad? Is there any way you can work through these feelings and develop some kind of relationship with your father? I doubt that any excuse he offers will be good enough.

It sounds to me as if there is far too many years of hurt to be undone. Do you still live in the same town?

By the way, my dds have a bastard father who doesn't stay in touch with them. He has replaced them with another family.....fortunately on the other side of the world. I am grateful that he stays out of their lives. Do you really need a relationship with this side of the family at all? Did you have any other father-figure in your life?

No, it's not their fault. That's why I've deleted them without a word. I don't need to see what they post, but at this present time I don't need to explain why to them.

However, HS1 appears to be quite mouthy and is likely to question why I've broken the link. Either that or they won't even notice.

I do understand it would be more dignified for me to keep my gob shut.

Popple, my Mum did remarry but he was even more of a cock than my Dad, violent, abusive etc.

I lived in the same town as my Dad until I was 14 (he left when I was 6), lived in a neighbouring village until I was 21, moved away for 12 years and came back two years ago.

He, however, had moved 80 miles away by this point and not even bothered to tell me.

I've written him a letter before (when he didn't respond to my wedding invitation) and his wife phoned me up saying "he's been ill, he finds it awkward, he does care, you know etc etc".