to be annoyed that my dh has invited some pisshead friends over?

[pavlovthepregnantcat]

I am 8 wks pg, have felt awful for weeks, tired, sickness, in bed early, poor dh has gone out lots as I have just crashed most evenings. I said to him yesterday that he did not have to go out, friends could come over too, just do not expect me to stay up, he said he was pleased I had said that as he had invited a close friend of his over for x-box session. Absolutely fine with that, in fact pleased as it means he does not feel he always has to go out or be bored indoors.

So, friend is over, they are probably going to have a couple of drinks. Again that is fine. why on earth not.

We do not usually have lots of people over at once. Occasionally we do, for a particular event, meal, or we invite a few over for guitar hero or similar. but not often, and not if I am not participating.

So, just get a call from an alcoholic friend (or indeed her boyfriend) who is loud and brash. DH comes into the bedroom as I have already gone to bed, and tells me this dunkard couple are coming over. yes, I did say just called, at 9:45pm. FFS. So I say 'ok, fucking great' and he just shuts the bedroom door.

WTF! 9:45pm, they will be here in 10 mins and she will be fucking loud and annoying within 30 mins.

And we live in a flat, and the front room is next door to the bedroom.

I am pissed off, but if she has already invited herself, they will be here in a second so I cant uninvite her.

Sorry you did say bring your friends over.....so he is

YABU

See the context in which we had the conversation was clearly not 'bring your friends over' I did not explain the exact words I said, as I cannot recall the exact words, but it was not an invitation to have a party when we usually would not, but that he could invite the friends over that he would usually be going to see, not additional friends.

We would not normally see these people together.

but hey, i did ask!

pavlov - so you are going to have a great time being knackered and feeling awful and sick in the bedroom and DH is going to suffer greatly having a noisy drunken time with some shrieky mates? Sounds like a really crap evening for someone?

nightcrawler - yes, indeed. I wanted him to not have a shit night, for him to be able to relax in his own home without tiptoeing around or having to go out, but did not expect the alternative to be out of all the people who could come around, a woman who gets so drunk within 2 hours she swigs out of the wine bottle!

I get you Pav. I'd be the same. I'd be fine with a couple of the lads coming over for X-Box Sesh, but blokes and partners. Bit much imho.

Thanks Mo. The whole point was so he could continue socialising as he wanted without being outed from the house. Not to do things he does not normally do. Admittedly he did not invite her, she invited herself and her boyfriend, after hearing probably that alcohol was going to be involved, she lives literally 2 mins around the corner. He could have just said sorry no its a quiet lads one.

Well i am going to get a few winks now, while I can! I am hoping that if I get to sleep before the noise starts to get too loud, I might be ale to sleep through it, like my dd does. She needs quiet to get to sleep, but once asleep she will sleep through a party!!! I am sure it is not from me though but will give it a try!

Wish me luck, and some patience!

Good luck. I hope she doesn't make too much noise. Make your peace with DH tomorrow. I'm sure he'll understand what upset you, if you explain.

LOL, it did not last long! She got annoyed that her boyfriend did not back her up in a discussion she was having where others disagreed, then flounced off home followed by her boyfriend! She has probably made sure they won't be invited anywhere for a while! I am certainly remembering why we have not invited them for a social for a while!

I did not say much to DH as no harm done in the end, and he said he had not choice, it was a case of 'right, we shall come over shall we then?' put him on the spot. Got to feel a bit sorry for him I guess, got a moaning pg wife one side and a demanding 'friend' the other!

You weren't being unreasonable at all Pavlov.

This happened me last year when I was pregnant and like you very very tired.

Invited a friend over for dinner with his girlfriend. Thought they'd be gone by 9pm. Dinner turned into beer and x-box.

I waddled off to bed about 11pm and couldn't sleep for the loud laughing and talking. DP came up to bedroom and told me he'd dropped hints but they're weren't making any move to leave.

I got out of bed, went downstairs and told them firmly but not rudely that the night was over and I'd ring them a taxi.

I'm not going to sit in MY house feeling uncomfortable waiting for someone to leave of their own accord when they've blatantly outstayed their welcome.

If they want to stay up all night drinking (and good luck to them If they do) then do it somewhere else!