That lots of people of this board judge men by thier ability to do housework

[Blessingsdragon]

Why is every other thread ??my BIL does not wash up and baby sit my kids when I visit my sister? - Erh perhaps he doesn?t like you or your kids? Perhaps he gives your sister fantastic oral sex every night because she always washes up.
?? My husband always panics when left alone with our six kids?? - How would you do left doing his job? ETC

This is not about the feckless alcoholics or just bums but Men are different - which is why personally I love them

And please donnt get me wrong I am not a surrendered wife - my own DH was a SAHD for 4 years - still does all the cooking and knows much more about fabric conditioner that I will ever want to know - but is not particularly keen on anyone?s kids apart from our own - doesn?t get a lot of goes on at the school gate (which has taught me to be less concerned) and thinks womens talk too much about crap

I personally did not want to marry another woman

Very poor show to do a thread about a thread.

Sorry its not about 1 thread its about lots of threads and about alot of the attitude.

Well your OP is quite specific and easily identifies one particular thread. FWIW I think there is very little of that attitude on here.

Perhaps he gives your sister fantastic oral sex every night because she always washes up.
?? My husband always panics when left alone with our six kids?? - How would you do left doing his job? ETC

Have to say those 2 comments I find incredibly sexist (is looking after your children just your job (if you are a woman that is).

op makes absolutly no sense to me

'Perhaps he gives your sister fantastic oral sex every night because she always washes up.'

Yes, that's why she washes up I'm sure, because she is 'rewarded' for it, as we women are that shallow.

Oh and this is a thread about threads, very bad form that.

Well...

This is predominantly a site for women with children.

Women in general bear the brunt of responsibility for housework, even in this enlightened age.

Many people like to vent about what is getting to them.

It is not unreasonable that the result is many threads with women bemoaning the fact that they do an unfair share of the housework and that others sympathise.

I can't see anything unreasonable or odd in that at all. I'd be surprised if things weren't that way TBH.

(What thread is it in response to?)

my dh is very domesticated, but totally crap at traditional man things like tiling, electrics etc, while it's great we can share the workload around the house, I would trade some of his domesticity for some diy skills, as to get someone in to do the simplest job costs an arm and a leg !! , consequently my house has loads of unfinished jobs as we can't afford to get any one in!! but hey I'm not complaining--much!!

I'm sorry that I was specific about a thread did not know that was bad form - they just happened to be the too latest a long those lines in which some of the posts not all are what a barstard he must be if he doesn?t wash up

And not quite sure why if I donnt like one attitude about a board means I donnt like Mum?s net and should go some where else? Think that suggestion should be bad form but there you are

Re being sexist no just suggesting that peoples trade off?s are different

off you fuck then. Go wash your husbands shitty knickers. Then tell him if he washes up you'll give him a blow job.

I haven?t expressed myself very well -

re the trade off all I ment was something as simple as my Dh does all the cooking whilst I deal with the financial side of things- I just think people are very quick to judge other people?s norms and call them bastards because they don?t help domestically when they may do other things

As for the women thing, my mother was a lesbian, so pretty used to ??bits?? and a lot of she/she relationships are very traditional in the divide of labour

you sound lost and confused you poor thing. Did your mother being a lesbian try to indoctrinate you with man-hating views and now you feel the need to rebel against it all.

Tell us all about your mother dear

Oh - it's about balance and feeling as though 'We' as a couple are a 'team' working towards a mutual goal... when this balance is unequal it isn't fair, it's not shared responsibility, one person is surfing on the efforts of another and to many this is an unhealthy relationship.

I'm glad that those who experience this kind of inequality have got MumsNet to air their worries and grievances.

I don't think you should be told to F'off - that's just rude, but also I don't think your point is being made well.

OP you make no sense.

My husband and I have no trade offs. We have a grown up relationships whereas if a job needs doing, whoever is best able to do it - for whatever reason - will do it.

It's not on to take the piss out of the sexuality of someone's parent/s, no matter how random their posts are.

OP has said some odd things but that is just not on.

Penis size for me!

(that is what I judge men on - housework is too random - one may be good at hoovering whereas another may be good at washing up and ironing!)

I'm crap at housework and never do any, but I don't have a willy. I think what people are complaining about (whether they identify it as such or not) is the way some men still make use of entrenched male privilege (not to do the shitwork, because that's what women are for). Here's an easy way to check if your couple-relationship is an equal partnership or not: do you both get approximately the same amount of free time to enjoy yourselves? If not, then the one who gets all the free time is regarding the other one as a servant.

Nametaken - your a bitch

That doesn't make sense either

I think that you would be complaining if your husband was crap at housework, but he's clearly not (you say he knows more about fabric softener etc) so you may not realise how frustrating it is to go through the boring routine of cleaning and tidying only to have your loved one continually come and muck it all up. My female friend lives with a girl (house share) who isn't very domesticated and she complains about that- it's the cleaning up after someone else that's annoying. I still wouldn't enjoy cleaning up after someone else even if they did go down on me every night.

Come on everyone give Blessingsdragon a break - there are a lot of threads like the ones she describes. It is not just one thread.

Men should do more at home - we all agree that many men are lazy at home but doig teh hoovering is not the only thing that matters to her. Her DH does his fair share and she is saying she also likes and celebrates the differences between a man and a woman. That is not so bad - it is good.

I do housework and my DW barely lifts a finger to cook and clean but she does the washing and we share the ironing and childcare. I like the fact that she is a woman too. I did not want to marry a man. I think that is all Blessingsdragon is saying and I agree with her.

It's the fact that Blessing's DH "thinks womens talk too much about crap" that I find - vexing, shall we say? Because men almost always only make profound utterances, eh?