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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think this old man was a dirty bugger???!!!

38 replies

wintera · 10/04/2009 13:45

So yesterday I went food shopping with my Mum and my niece. After loading up the car I took the trolley back. There was an old man struggling with his trolley. Anyway, I asked him if he was OK, and whether he wanted any help. He said yes as he couldn't get his £1 back. So I tried for a while but I also couldn't get the money out. I told him to go and get one of the blokes that stack the trolleys, as they usually have (as I put it) "a special thing" to push the money out. He then thrust his crotch at me and pointed to his willy and said "I've got a special thing too, but it won't fit in there!"

I was really shocked by it! I didn't quite know what to say so I just smiled and walked off back to my car. When I told my Mum and my niece they thought it was hilarious! So did my sister and nephew too. Maybe its me being a bit over-sensitive but I think I was more shocked because of his age. And because I didn't know the guy at all. It was all a bit too familiar for my liking. My Dad and my Father in law are both in their 70's and I know they would never speak to a younger lady like that.

What do you guys think? Am I just having a sense of humour bypass or was I right to be so taken aback by it? I would be interested in your comments!!

OP posts:

Original poster

wintera · 10/04/2009 16:56

Well I have just told my Dad about it and to put it politely, he hit the feckin roof! He said its disgusting to speak to a young woman like that, and he didn't find it funny at all. My husband and my Dad are the only ones who haven't laughed when I have told them. Interesting that!

OP posts:

YanknbeforetheCockcrows · 10/04/2009 17:07

I asked DH for a 'man's perspective' and after a guffaw he said it was 'just wrong...funny, but wrong'. Then I asked him how he'd feel if someone spoke to me like that---and he got quite serious and said 'No, I wouldn't like that at all'.

If it was a comedy sketch on TV, I suppose I'd laugh, but in real life it's just rude, nasty, and unnecessary.

Judy1234 · 10/04/2009 17:11

Not nice at all although due to my parents needing care, dying etc in the last few years I've seen loads of older people who lose their mind slowly and sometimes just don't know what is normal or appropriate behaviour any more.

Original poster

wintera · 10/04/2009 17:19

The thing that seemed to upset my Dad the most was that I was being nice and helpful to the old guy, and then for him to say something like that afterward, was completely inappropriate.

Thanks for all your comments anyway. They have made very interesting reading!

OP posts:

HerBeatitudeLittleBella · 10/04/2009 17:44

It may well be early symptoms of alzheimers or dementia. One of the symptoms is unseemly sexual behaviour, so as SGB says, it could be that he's always been a dirty old bastard but it could be that he is a normal bloke who is becoming ill and hasn't yet been picked up by the health service. Either way I would report it as if it is the latter, it will need investigating for his sake - if he's ill and is starting to do this, he might be attacked by an affronted husband next time.

abbierhodes · 10/04/2009 22:17

Can I just say, it doesn't read to me as though he flashed her, I thought he just pointed to his crotch.

MamaHobgoblin · 10/04/2009 22:23

I'd have been shocked too, although at least it stopped there, and I always have reported flashers.

But: I hate to make allowances for dirty old buggers, but given he was so old, I do wonder if he'd had a stroke, or some other type of brain damage that had the effect of lifting his normal inhibitions.

solidgoldshaggingbunnies · 10/04/2009 22:31

I don't think I would have been thrilled if it happened to me but I am, I'm afraid, a rather vulgar person and every now and again I make what I think is a funny remark, having forgotten that I'm talking to, or in the company of, people who are not as accustomed to expletive-laden smutty conversation as my usual crew. The bloke might have been mortified the minute you walked away.

vixma · 10/04/2009 22:45

I diagnose this man as a dirty old bastard, poor you, what a pervert.

differentEggD · 10/04/2009 22:48

that's disgusting behaviour.

Original poster

wintera · 11/04/2009 13:47

I just want to clarify that he didn't get his tackle out. He just sort of thrust it in my direction and pointed to it. Then said what he said. If he had got his willy out then I would have rammed the trolley into it!!

OP posts:

VerityClinch · 11/04/2009 18:55

When I was in my early twenties, my best friend was obsessed with the mice you see running up and down the tube lines - he wanted to get one as a pet (bear with me on this one, it IS relevant).

Fast forward to a couple of weeks later on the train, and the man sitting opposite me had got a tube mouse - it was sitting on his lap and he was stroking it. I stared at it for AGES wondering how he had managed to get one of those mice... then it dawned on me it wasn't ACTUALLY a mouse he was stroking. I had been staring for a good five minutes by that point (soooo naive)... just got up quietly and moved to another seat...

BottySpottom · 11/04/2009 19:35

Verity - that's so funny - but so awful too

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