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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

in expecting my house to stay clean now my kids are older??

36 replies

MiserableMotherFlunker · 05/04/2009 22:17

Youngest of my 3 is 7 (aged up to 12)and my house is a constant mess when they are home. They drop sweet wrappers, lolly sticks, crumbs, banana skins, apple cores all over the place. When we have dinner, the table and uderneath it is covered in food (despite my constant reminders of 'Eat over your plate') as if 20 people have sat there rather than 5. They leave their drink glasses wherever they happen to be when they've finished it. They leave sticky/dirty handprints on the windows and walls. They run out to the garden with no shoes on and carry mud and grass in on their socks and leave unmentionable messes in the loos .

When will I ever be able to houseproud again? I shout tell them until I am blue in the face to clear up after themselves but it does not get through. Now I know there are more important things to get stressed about but I have always been a bit anal about housework - a tidy house = a tidy mind and all that and I don't mind having their junk toys over the house but I cant stand the dirt and after 12 years of it, I am going insane!!

OP posts:

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 05/04/2009 22:19

They'll leave home. Eventually.

So I'm told.

GypsyMoth · 05/04/2009 22:23

I have 5.......... Two of them are teenagers, it gets worse as they get older. Hit the bottle!!

HotCrossGoober · 05/04/2009 22:26

Ban sweets/crisps/biscuits until they can be more responsible.

I have 3. 10, 13 and 14. They would be messy buggers to if I wasn't alwaays on their case.

bellavitalikesthesimnellife · 05/04/2009 22:28

I just so know how you feel. My ds's are nearly 12 and 9.

We bought a bin for DS1's room but the sweet papers etc still end up on the floor.

DS chomps away with a chair up to the work surface so he can watch the tv whilst having a snack - but leaves whatever peel/wrappers there may be on the side.

I was watching ds1 eat tonight, his plate was about half a mile away across the table, I am constantly pushing it underneath him.

When I am out the back, they come through the front door and through two rooms with shoes on to say something to me rather than take the shoes off or go through the side gate round to the back - arrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhh.

I too am anal about housework

MorocconOil · 05/04/2009 22:33

Oh this is not what I want to hear. Mine are 9, 7 and 4 and their mess has started to depress me. I was hoping they would start to be tidier as they mature.

It's so infuriating when they get certificates from school for being a good organiser of the classroom.

mamas12 · 05/04/2009 22:35

Well same here until I warned them that anything they leave lying around will be put into their bed. And yes I did it, childish maybe but it was such a ffaff sorting it out that they do now try and at least when I ask they put things in the bin. (most of the time)

bellavitalikesthesimnellife · 05/04/2009 22:36

I have said to DS1 that he can tidy, hoover and polish his bedroom tomorrow morning. The look of horror on his face at having to start picking things up before he can actually get the hoover in there.... although I will say for ds2, if he sees me upstairs with the hoover he does always ask if he can do his own bedroom (thing is though he uses half a can of polish! )

FfreckleFface · 05/04/2009 22:37

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Yes.

TheCrackFox · 05/04/2009 22:37

I naively thought that once you get past the toddler stage the mess would start to calm down.

Ha, fucking, ha.

They just get more creative with it.

Toddler shoes strewn all over the place look cute. Stinky 8 yr old boys shoes (nearly as big as my feet) just look messy. Aaaaarrrggghh!

GypsyMoth · 05/04/2009 22:38

Rule in this house is NO food upstairs or in lounge! I told them I found RAT droppngs (mice are too cute,rats scare them) under their beds!!!!!!

twinsetandpearls · 05/04/2009 22:39

I have had exactly the same with dd today.

Bella dd also does through loads of polish and leaves everything smeary.

MorocconOil · 05/04/2009 22:44

I did find mouse droppings under DS2'S bed.
We had a mouse infestation, which has now been dealt with, but it was vile thinking about them sniffing around his bed.
He is the worst of the DC for eating and dropping crumbs etc. We've just banned fruit in bed(again) as there are patches from mouldy fruit on the carpet.

bellavitalikesthesimnellife · 05/04/2009 22:45

ILove - we have a no food upstairs/sitting room/conservatory rule in this house too! But it does not stop them from having sweets/chewing gum in their pockets and then taking it upstairs to their rooms . In fact ds2 is a nightmare with chewing gum for taking it out and sticking it in places it should not be stuck (saves it for later).

twinset - sometimes the duster is too wet with polish to use!

Original poster

MiserableMotherFlunker · 05/04/2009 22:54

I did too enforce a rule of all eating and drinking to be at the table and nowhere else, but as soon as my back is turned the darlings make a run for it with contraband in hand!! I have bought them flip flop type shoes to slip on when they go outside (we are a shoeless house) but it seems that it is too much effort for them to slide them on.

DS is not happy when I stand over him while he scrubs the toilet though (he is a very messy toileter ) but he will not learn. When someone comes round, I have to do a made dash to the downstairs loo to make sure he has'nt been in there!!

I sometimes think the constant repeating of myself is a kind of slow torture.

OP posts:

Original poster

MiserableMotherFlunker · 05/04/2009 22:55

should be mad not made.

OP posts:

MorocconOil · 05/04/2009 22:56

I find picking things up off the floor slow torture.

Jajas · 05/04/2009 23:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GypsyMoth · 05/04/2009 23:08

Simple, don't feed them them LOL!!!! No food to drop then!!

Have you got girls? Teenage girls, lovely creatures!!! Nail varnish oncarpets, 3 changes of clothes daily,which don't get dirty, just thrown I the laundry anyway!! Endless bags and shoes, hot hair straighteners damaging every surface they go on, not to mention having to constantly check the damned things are unplugged!!!!

kidowner · 05/04/2009 23:20

I was not particularly tidy until I married my dh who was. So I had to learn alongside dc as they grew up.

I read a Montessori book which said children should choose activity, then put it away after.

Then if you do all the things that become second nature eg cleaning teeth,going to the toilet, washing hands etc and include tidying up after themselves, it becomes second nature too.

Apparently you have to 'imprint' this around age 2-3 and if you leave it too late you'll be nagging them for ever more.

Pre schools etc have a 'tidy up time'so it's good to get practising early.

Well, as I'm not at all domestic (hate it) I did not want to be tidying up after dc so I set about getting tidying up, clothes in laundry basket, rubbish in bins all done in as fun a way as possible.

It works! But the secret I think is to be consistent and have a partner who 'sings from the same songsheet'.

I have 5dc and they all help in the house to keep it clean and tidy. It's a team effort and my ds hopefully will not be lazy slobs when they gets married nor expect only women to do it. Heaven forbid!

allthoseeggsaremine · 05/04/2009 23:40

Mine have got worse, in some respects, as they have got older aswell

They use the whole cupboard of glasses during the course of the day, can't seem to be able to rinse the one out that they started with and reuse it. They make meals at all times of the day, different school/college times kind of dictate this, but it means the kitchen is always in use and covered with pasta and grated cheese
They change a million times a day and clothes left everywhere...........

I too, told them i found mouse droppings (which i didn't) I also told them if they leave food in their rooms we will be invaded with ants. We actually had ants on the kitchen table this morning, i dragged each of them in there to tell them it was their own fault, it was actually dh's i think, for leaving sugar on the table after breakfast.

Drive me mad

Tortington · 05/04/2009 23:43

yabcompletely unreasonable.

one day...i will have my home.

in about 2-3 years. God willing.

cat64 · 06/04/2009 00:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ChippingIn · 06/04/2009 01:53

Well, Lo's (3 & 22 months) aren't allowed to do any of that (other than make a mess under the table when they are eating and it's not so much like they are 'allowed' to do that, just that they aren't so great at not doing it yet!! But they are getting good at cleaning up the mess ).

They both put washing in the laundry basket, tidy their PJ's, take plates, cups to the sink, take off shoes as soon as inside the door and put them on to go out, put them away inbetween, tidy their toys etc etc .... they are little dreams ... however, reality bites and I don't expect this to be the case forever and fully expect to have to turn into a complete NAG to achieve the same thing in 5 years!!!

I know it will never be this good again until they leave home . I make the most of it!!

bellavitalikesthesimnellife · 06/04/2009 08:16

MMM - the toilet dashing - I do that also

bellavitalikesthesimnellife · 06/04/2009 08:19

should say MMF

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