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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

and oversensitive?

22 replies

piratecat · 04/04/2009 09:39

To be annoyed by a jokey text to me saying 'holiday,? you don't work!!, every day is a holiday'

when I'd said, jokingly but also dreamily, 'god i need a holiday'

My background is known by person, but it's not someone I have know for long

This person that i am single mum, ex dh makes dd's life hell, dd is ill at the moment too. I get little support/ help.

I'm think am, being oversensitive aren't I. I hate being sensitive, i hate the baggage I have aquired believe me. Yet I thought the comment a bit unneccesary.

go on hit me with it!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 09:40

this person 'knows' I...

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 04/04/2009 09:41

I'd text back and say'er,no,every day is NOT a holiday, don't even get a day off!'

Am in similiar position to you so I can sympathize! Chin up!!

Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 09:48

so you don't think IABU?

good answer might text that.

OP posts:
sheenaisapunkrocker · 04/04/2009 09:58

I don't think you are being unreasonable. People say the crapest things don't they? My most recent "truth" from a "friend" (and this in no way compares to the insensitive comment you've just received) was " are you are in bed with just a cold?" Seeing that I am 22 weeks into a somewhat difficult pregnancy and the "cold" has actually laid me out flat with a fever, sore throat, hacking cough etc... crap crap crap. Don't listen, that's my advice.

blinks · 04/04/2009 09:58

i'd be more offended by their improper punctuation.

IheartEASTEREGGS · 04/04/2009 10:01

or turn the 'joke' around on her and say 'ha ha you can talk, you get to sit around all day at work and get breaks. I'm on my feet all day and dont even get to go to the loo on my own. Your life sounds like a holiday to me!'

TsarChasm · 04/04/2009 10:03

Yanbu...txt back with 'God I need a holiday..from U'

I can't bear people who trivialise others choices or circumstances.

Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 10:09

thanks! I have no idea when I got so 'sensitive' without thinking I have a right to be in such matters.

OP posts:
tessofthedurbervilles · 04/04/2009 10:09

I would just ignore the text and let them wonder why....maybe then they might think about why sending a message like that to someone who clearly does deserve / need a break is inappropriate.

Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 10:12

ok I sent that text that Ilovetiffany suggested.

I got back

Sorry, was only kidding, guess your not one for sarcasm then! oops. x

yes this is from a bloke, which i prob should have said.

it sounds like an apology that then turns it round on me still doesn't it!

OP posts:
tessofthedurbervilles · 04/04/2009 10:13

I would send back 'I do like sarcasm but only when its funny'

TsarChasm · 04/04/2009 10:15

Oh good for you!

I used to have a neighbour who used to crow -'Oh here she is, lady of leisure' and he wasn't being ironic. I had new born twins and a 3 year old at the time. How I kept my hands of his throat I'll never know

Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 10:17

tess, i prob should have ignored!!!, which i do all the time with my ex. Thats why i posted on here becuase I wondered if my sense of humour has wilted and distorted, becuase i have to put up with so much crap!!

This was (note was) a new bloke, who is a dad himself.

OP posts:
loulou35 · 04/04/2009 10:19

.. i would say ' sarcasm is the lowest form of wit- guess thats why you use it then! oops x ......

Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 10:19

tsarcharm, i knew one of those, he would say to my neighbour a similar thing, AND comment on how nmuch weight she'd put on during pregnancy.

even men who seem to be nice seem to be wankers underneath.

OP posts:
brettgirl2 · 04/04/2009 10:21

I think that rather then texting you should try talking to him instead. It's so easy for things to come out completely the wrong way, particularly if it is someone you are seeing.

Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 10:24

yes getting caught up in this new fangled texting malarky is laborious. Yet then shine has been taken off for me, i simply don't have the energy. (goes to fetch another sick bowl for dd!!)

OP posts:
Original poster
piratecat · 04/04/2009 10:27

just did the 'lowest form of wit' thing,

and got back an 'okay, I'm sorry'

back of the net!!!

OP posts:
LouMacca · 04/04/2009 10:28

I agree with brettgirl. You could end up having a major fall-out playing text tennis. Your friend has made a silly and insensitive comment and I can understand why you are upset. And this is from someone who has children!

I was a SAHM to twins and always had comments like this. I just replied by saying I didn't know what hard work was until I had children.

Bathsheba · 04/04/2009 11:00

Its basic human nature - EVERYONE thinks they have it worse than people who do something else.

Everyone I know that works thinks being a SAHM is dead easy. Everyone I know that is a SAHM thinks that people who work have it dead easy.

Its standard, its accross the board...

YANBU in that it was a crass comment from someone trying and failing to be funny BUT please do learn to let things like that wash over you - it will happen all your life. When/If you stop being a SAHM then it will be someone with a different job, or in a different dept who will firmly believe that "everyone who does xxxxx has a great life, and everyone who does yyyyy like me is really persecuted"

Mumcentreplus · 04/04/2009 11:03
Hmm
loulou35 · 04/04/2009 11:06

would give him some space aad let his make ammends now

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