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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would this have embarrassed you or am I being daft?

59 replies

KnifeNFork · 02/04/2009 21:29

Sitting in a 'fish n chip' resteraunt type place with relatively new "boyfriend" for want of a better word. Not a posh place, not a scabby place, just "Nice" iyswim?

So waitress comes across and asks if I'd like gravy, curry etc with my fish and chips. I asked if the curry had sultanas in, she said yes. I said "oh, I won't have any then, thank you".

Well, bloke gasped and started shouting quite loudly "IS THAT TRUE??? YOU DON'T LIKE SULTANAS??? NEITHER DO I!!! ISN'T THAT STRANGE!! DO YOU REALLY NOT LIKE THEM??? ISN'T IT WIERD HOW WE BOTH LIKE SO MUCH OF THE SAME STUFF??" waitress just raised an eyebrow. I sank into my chair and mumbled something about gravy.

I was so embarrassed. Point is, only reason we 'like so much of the same stuff' anyway is because he copies everything I say!

But besides that, was I being ridiculous to feel embarrassed by his excitement at me not liking sultanas??

OP posts:
ChippingIn · 02/04/2009 22:09

Agree with Alibaba and the 40 others

Been there, done that - he embarrassed me soooo much I didn't want him meeting my family and friends, but I enjoyed being with him with his friends (most of the time) as they knew what he was like. It took me too long to finish with him and I really hurt him, I really regret not finishing it as soon as I knew, for me, it wasn't going anywhere

KnifeNFork · 02/04/2009 22:12

ChippingIn, that sounds the same as this. I cringe at the thought of him meeting my friends and family which I know is awful.

He keeps going on about how great I am and calling me a "special lady" etc, I find it all a bit nausiating.

OP posts:
Alibabaandthe40bunnies · 02/04/2009 22:15

K&F - I'm cringing with you. I have been in that situation - many moons ago! You don't end it because you feel shallow, but it's kinder not to continue it.

'special lady'? Eeek!

rebee · 02/04/2009 22:47

did you see the episode of friends starring alec baldwin as phoebe's boyfriend?

get rid, there's a woman out there that will adore him for his enthusiasm... he's not what you want so why waste your time and his

tigerdriver · 02/04/2009 22:51

You'd better ditch him quick, or the KnifeNFork will be embedded in his irritating head! He's irritating me just reading this, and YANBU about the day out. Just reel forward a few years....

MoneyMakingMamma · 02/04/2009 23:26

KnifeNFork, hang on a minute, I've seen this, isn't this scripted from Peep Show?

Shitemum · 03/04/2009 12:18

Is he about 15.5 yo and are you his first ever girlfriend?

Redazzy · 03/04/2009 12:35

I'm with most of the others! He sounds weirdly cute and very keen but you are JUST NOT THAT INTO HIM!

I think it may be time to say Goodbye!

solidgoldshaggingbunnies · 03/04/2009 12:38

Urgh, nothing is more offputting than enthusiastic keenness from someone you're not that bothered about. Honestly, dump him now as nicely as possible before you end up hating him and dumping him really hurtfully.

Pinkjenny · 03/04/2009 12:39

Bless him, he's very enthusiastic! He'd definitely grate on my nerves. Get rid. He may cry though.

PuppyMonkey · 03/04/2009 12:41

OMG!!! I DON'T LIKE SULTANAS EITHER!!!!! THAT'S SO MAAAAAAAAAD!!!!!!!!

FairLadyOfMuslinCloth · 03/04/2009 12:50

am with shitemum...he sounds about 15

Gentle · 03/04/2009 12:51

What diedandgonetodevon said. Splitting up with someone because they're too nice is always a toughie, though.

wotulookinat · 03/04/2009 12:51

OMG! I LOVE SULTANAS! THAT'S LIKE THE OPPOSITE OF YOU!!!! THAT'S SOOOOO WEIRD!

IheartEASTEREGGS · 03/04/2009 12:55

i hate sultanas

mankymummy · 03/04/2009 12:56

hey... special lady, he is in a word...

KEEN.

or actually maybe a little...

OVERKEEN?!

Sbeanmum · 03/04/2009 12:57

YABU, to be honest.

He's clearly very keen and you're very clearly not keen - knock it on the head before he gets hurt!

oregonianabroad · 03/04/2009 13:01

If you do dump him, you are not allowed to use any of these words:

'You're too nice.'

'It's not you, it's me.'

or

'I'm just not that into you.'

chances are, he'll have heard those already.

Instead, try the classic:

'I just don't think I'm ready for this.'

muggglewump · 03/04/2009 13:07

The "special lady" part would have had me running a mile. Ugh, that's just too boaky.

purpleduck · 03/04/2009 13:09

hmmm
Agree if you find him irritating now...

However, the day out thing sounds an awful lot like me and dh. I am a "lets just go, and sort it out on the way..." kindof a girl, whilst he likes to know everything in advance. Balances out as I would forget everything . But I don't want to hit him with a frying pan, as you seem in danger of doing...

Fairynufff · 03/04/2009 16:43

He sounds like an Aries... but don't be too hard on him - he sounds like he really likes you. The conversation about the holiday reminds me of me and my DH because he's "laid back" and as a consequence we get nothing planned, nothing booked in advance and end up not doing anything or leaving it too late to get good seats/places etc. It drives me mad - it sounds like his way of trying to include you in the decision making process which I have learned NOT to do. I simply serve up arrangements as a fait accompli and DH has to go along with.

Shitemum · 03/04/2009 21:26

Fairynuff - are you an Aries?

Onestonetogo · 03/04/2009 21:40

Message withdrawn

ScottishMummy · 03/04/2009 21:54

KnifeNfork he should dump you for SHOUTING and gratuitous bold text,never mind the fucking sultana's

tigerdriver · 03/04/2009 22:07

watch your apostrophes, SM