to think that my ex is totally out of order

[Quadrophenia]

right so I recently started a thread regarding my nex wanting to introduce the children to his new girlfriend, in which I stated that as this is a very new realtionship and as my children are still dealing with our seperation i didn't see what purpose it would serve at this juncture....they have been togtehr for about a month..
Anyway it materialised last night in a conversation with my children that they met her three weeks ago( when the relationship was very new). She was supposed to be staying in a hotel nearby and then phoned him to say there was a problem and he took the children out at nine o clock to fetch her and she then stayed over..this would have been a couple of weeks in t he relationship no more. He told my children not to tell me as i would shout at him, when my youngest spilled the beans last nigth, the others were hysterical worried about the possible rammifications. how dare he do this to the children, it's one thing for him to lie to me but to encourage my children to do the same...that is just wrong surely?

he is currently undergoing counselling for his anger issues so i would rather not knock him back or use this...that said his lack of judgement cvoncerning the children is really worrying me....There are alot if issues with his gf that concern me but I'm trying not to tie myself up in knots over these first anmd fore most HE should be strong enough to put his kids first.

Quad - he really is a plank. I'm not suprised you are worried. I would be having serious words with him about making them lie to you, children should never be made to lie to either parent by anyone - can he not see how vulnerable this makes them???

I replied on your other thread - it's too soon for them, especially when your split is so recent, to meet a new GF (especially this one) let alone have her staying there. I know you can't dictate who he introduces them to when he has them, but FFS how do you teach common-fucking-sense to a grown man???

Really feeling for you and wanting to kick his sorry arse

When I mentioned the vulnerability issue he told me not to be so melodramatic...considering that I have not raised my voice once over this issue i can't see how he can say that....I have calmly pointed out to him my concerns, and how his actions have a very direct impact on the emotional well being of our children...His lack of common sense and just the sheer fact that he cannot back up his arguement makes me feel his opinions are not his own.. the hotel issue for example, she knew he was spending time with his children, there are many many hotles around town...and what the hell was she doing here when it was the one evening in along time that he was actually having his children. I still do not get what sort of a mum would see this as a good idea...mny children are young and going through some tough times, I try to support and protect them as much as possible, i just want him to do the same!