and a bad mother here?

[applepudding]

Later this afternoon I have a target setting meeting with DS's teacher, where I will be most concerned that he does not seem to have progressed since the assessment score he was given at end of KS1 last year.

Today he is off school with a cold, so he is snuffly but not really ill (probably could have gone to school had I had the time this morning to have got him up in time to see his condition but I had to be in work early and DH was at home). Anyway, am I sitting here with him reading books or practising word puzzles?

No he is sitting on his PSP playing with a skateboarding game which seems to involve spraying graffiti on walls and throwing water bombs at passers by. Its not exactly graphic violence, but these aren't exactly the sorts of things I want DS to be thinking are right. He says 'its only a game mom', but all the same, is this an appropriate sort of game for a 7 year old to be playing?

What's the rating on the game?

If you think it is not appropriate, then don't let him play it. He's the seven year old, you are the mother, you are in control of him. It's not up to him to decide that it's 'only a game'.

YABU. Bad mother? - depends how often it happens IMO. A child kept off school to play inappropriate computer games when not actually ill probably won't make as much progress as possible.

TBH I don't know DH downloaded it and put it on his memory stick. We've just been discussing that. I'm hoping its a 7+ or at worst at 12+ as I say there isn't any graphic violence on it, its just depicting things you wouldn't really want your DC doing

espec. when what he should be doing is being at school making the progress you are worried about him not making...!

YABU. If your DH was at home with DS, couldn't DH have seen that your son was well enough for school.
And...if a child is too ill for school, then they are too ill to play computer games, IMO.

Dilbertina - yes exactly that's why I'm particularly feeling I'm being a bit of a hypocrite and a bad mother here!

let it go for today.

get dh to delete it later.

'I'm hoping it's a 7+ or at worst a 12+...'?

Shouldn't you know the rating of the games your DS is playing? Do you just stick a DVD in and hope it's not an 18? - and if he's not really ill, as you say, I would get him in his uniform and send him to school. Or at least get him off the computer and give him a book to read. If you're worried about his progress, at least help him to make some!

At 7 I would stick with the age rating on the game.I would also be strict about when he was allowed to play.

Must admit I do allow 12yr old to play on 15 ratings with his older brothers.

When 15, 13, 12 yearolds are off school ill
I don't allow any games at all. I normally insist they stay in bed in the morning, and only let them watch TV after lunch.

I never force them to do school work if they're ill, but I think mine might take advantage if they thought they could have a day off on the XBox etc.

We have a rule in this house - if you should be in school, you can read, do some of your workbooks, or watch nature DVDs. No computers, no games. Needless to say, my dc never 'swing the lead' to get a day off (not that I'm saying yours is!).
You do need to be careful about age ratings on games and dvds. DS has a friend whose parents have never monitored what he's watching (the friend told when he was 8 that he'd seen Childs Play). At age 14 now, this lad has clearly been affected by this, quite badly, to a point where I wonder how he will function in later life.

I think I knew the answer when I posted here and you've all confirmed it. Off goes my computer and MN and off goes the PSP whilst we do something more constructive then!