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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that being measured for a suit is not the entire family spectator sport that mil think it is!

20 replies

sail73 · 29/03/2009 15:34

Dh needs to be measured for tails type suit for sils wedding. We went to church this morning dh works saturdays although he does have days off during the week. Mil has been going on for weeks that she wants fil and dh to go together fil works all week and has weekends off. Anyway I can't see why dh can't go during the week when he is available and fil goes on a saturday iyswim. Turns out thaat mil has been hassling dh about getting measuured this afternoon. Apparantly although wedding is not for another 6 months sil has stipulated that it absolutely MUST be done this week at the very very latest! Not only that but when I pointed out that they don't have to be done together and dh could do it during the week and fil on a saturday, she said its the whole build up thing the excitement and looking forward to the day and I should be involving the entire family (ie me ds1 and ds2) as part of that! When dh said that if we do go today I'll be staying behind so ds2 can have his afternoon nap she said doesn't dw want to see you being measured up? she sounded really surprised. Pil came round about 1.5 hours ago surprised that ds2 was asleep and I was having to stay behind thought I should have kept him up!!!! Even suggested we postpone it till next week although that is the deadline sil has stipulated so we can involve the whole family and include a meal out in this! In the end dh pil and ds2 went (mostly as ds2 wanted a trip out not because it is of any interst to a 3 year old at all! Ridiculous and no it is not a joke thread I only wish it was!

OP posts:
mrsmaidamess · 29/03/2009 15:37

I would love to read your thread but it hurts my eyes. Please paragraph!

KimiWantsAnEasterEgg · 29/03/2009 15:40

Weddings bring out the madness in people you know

PinkBubblesGoApe · 29/03/2009 15:40

I can see your pov, but really, weddings bring out funny reactions in people and maybe this is one of the only things she (mil) has been allowed to get involved with, and she wants to milk it for all its worth! Just let it go, it could be worse - she might want to see YOU being fitted out!!

sail73 · 29/03/2009 15:43

Sorry here it is with paragraphs!
Dh needs to be measured for tails type suit for sils wedding. We went to church this morning dh works saturdays although he does have days off during the week.

Mil has been going on and on for weeks that she wants fil and dh to go together fil works all week and has weekends off. Anyway I can't see why dh can't go during the week when he is available and fil goes on a saturday iyswim. Turns out thaat mil has been hassling dh about getting measuured this afternoon. Apparantly although wedding is not for another 6 months sil has stipulated that it absolutely MUST be done this week at the very very latest! Not only that but when I pointed out that they don't have to be done together and dh could do it during the week and fil on a saturday, she said its the whole build up thing the excitement and looking forward to the day and I should be involving the entire family (ie me ds1 and ds2) as part of that! When dh said that if we do go today I'll be staying behind so ds2 can have his afternoon nap she said doesn't dw want to see you being measured up? she sounded really surprised. Pil came round about 1.5 hours ago surprised that ds2 was asleep and I was having to stay behind thought I should have kept him up!!!! Even suggested we postpone it till next week although that is the deadline sil has stipulated so we can involve the whole family and include a meal out in this!

In the end dh pil and ds2 went (mostly as ds2 wanted a trip out not because it is of any interst to a 3 year old at all!

Ridiculous and no it is not a joke thread I only wish it was!

OP posts:
mychildrenarebarmy · 29/03/2009 15:44

YANBU. Get thee to you sil's fiance quick sharp and tell him to run while he still can! Seriously though, I can see that going out for a meal might be a nice follow up but watching him get measured for a suit!!!! Some people have fun in the most curious ways!

mrsmaidamess · 29/03/2009 15:52

Yes I agree weddings make people go nuts (usually the bride and mother/mil) And they don't get why your'e not sooooo excited like they are!

Logic goes out the window I'm afriad. You've just got to get the balance right between keeping bridezilla happy and not sacrificing what suits you.

sail73 · 29/03/2009 19:45

Had to go I'm afraid as dh,pil and ds came back! Apparantly the measurements (which is all they came for at thhis stage) took about 10 minutes the rest of the time was pil nipping into tescos before coming home. And this they mil wanted to make a big family occasion over? Madness!

OP posts:
sail73 · 29/03/2009 20:25

It isn't her only involvement in this wedding by the way. They are paying for the reception and sending out the invites in the traditional way to everyone - usual parents of the bride involvement iyswim? Just thought the hugh fuss with the measurement of the suits wanting to turn it into a big family occassion totally ott and strange!

OP posts:
HecatesTwopenceworth · 29/03/2009 20:52

No, you're not unreasonable to think they are being ott, but perhaps if you looked at it another way?

It is a big deal to them. A lot of people are really 'into' The Wedding, it's the be all and end all for them! Best day of their life and all that. And it's important to know that. And if you love them, then something so important to them ought to be worth making an effort for, right?

It doesn't really matter to you, does it? And that's fine. But - it doesn't hurt you in any way to go along with it and it matters to them, so why not just have a little sigh to yourself, and do it for them?

sail73 · 29/03/2009 21:27

I do see what you mean and its all academic now as the measuring is all over and done with and they don't go back for another 5 months. Just thought it strange and ott thats all!

OP posts:
sail73 · 29/03/2009 22:18

And yes I do care about the wedding it'll be a nice day well couple of days as they don't live near us so we'll be staying in a b&b or something! Just all this seemed ott to me!

OP posts:
wahwah1270 · 29/03/2009 23:47

yanbu

i went thru the same thing virtually exactly in december - hell on earth, i feel for you

sail73 · 30/03/2009 22:12

I wouldn't go that far wah wah

OP posts:
babyignoramus · 31/03/2009 09:57

Can I just point out that tailors often do need several month's notice to make a suit as they'll have lots in the pipeline. So her 6 month deadline is about right....

YANBU though.

JudithChalmers · 31/03/2009 09:59

"apparently"

you mean

sail73 · 31/03/2009 19:28

Apparently so Judith! Spellings not my strong point sometimes! Its not so much the 6 months deadline it was the need to make it in to some kind of big family ocassion and fil and dh had to do it together (according to mil) even though dh had the details and could have done it during the week.

OP posts:
fleurlechaunte · 31/03/2009 19:50

My MIL wanted to come to the church of a wedding she was not invited to, miles and miles away from where she lived in order to see ds in his little suit as he was a pageboy. So basically my MIL would have been lurking around the gates at the wedding of people who didn't know her from adam taking pictures of ds. Obviously I would have known who she was, it would been just awful.

Xh put his foot down and told her not to be so riduculous, thank goodness.

Just my little MIL and wedding related madness story there.

fleurlechaunte · 31/03/2009 19:51

ridiculous that is.

sail73 · 31/03/2009 20:52

To be fair I can see why pil are so excited about this wedding. Sil is in her 40's with 2 children (her dd's in her teens and her ds is in his 20's) but her xdp would never marry her although she always wanted to so they are obviously over the moon as its a day they never thought they'd see!

OP posts:
Wigglesworth · 31/03/2009 21:01

YANBU it sounds like she is mother of the bridezilla. They are just excited though and planning a wedding can do funny things to people. As long as it isn't affecting you in anyway just go along with it (but secretly snigger at them when they are getting all stressed and precious about it )

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