to be blooming annoyed at what parents are saying???

[muffins]

This is gonna be a long one...
Some people may remember I posted here previously as I was finding it difficult living with my parents, giving my parents quite a lot of money every month and unable to live on my own financially, mum telling me how to bring up my son who also lives in same house. Had tried renting previously but down here on south coast just too expensive and couldn't get council place and ended up back home.
So about a month ago I applied for a job in Yorkshire, really gd job, cheap to live up there. Went for interview Tues and found out yesterday got the job. Hadn't told parents about it til today as my mum's reaction would have been crappy, which she even admitted this evening she would have told me I'd be wasting my time going.
I'm not starting til Sept and after telling parents this evening they are telling me it is all mine and DS fault that they bought the house we are in (they recently moved to cheaper area last July) Apparently because of us they have a house which is too expensive to heat etc etc when if we hadn't been living with them they would have just bought the property they wanted! I never said anything to influence their house choice, or what they should buy or anything. AIBU to think this is a bit harsh? They are also annoyed I hadn't told them about it til today, but I didn't see the point in rocking the boat if I didn't even get the job, was that stupid?
Feeling very and and
AIBU?!

Yep I have asked the local mumsnet group too! Yes will be working at all 3 sites.
I don't mind a bit of a commute but then I think maybe initially I should just be as close to hospital as poss and move at a later date. It's so good to be able to actually ask people who already live there who also have children. Really does help me so thankyou
I think I'm going to come up mid July and arrange a load of viewings but obviously want idea of where I should be viewing if that makes sense

Good luck with the move. DH and I moved from London to Cardiff in Nov 2007. Didn't really know the area and viewed everywhere to get a feel (most viewings on a Saturday = 9!!).

We found it really useful to take a camera and write notes on the back of the house info given to us by the estate agent (so remembered what was what). Take photo of the road name/address before starting photos, then you'll know which photos are for which house.

Mused it over as soon as we'd finished viewing to reject/shortlist properties. Very easy to forget when there's so much to take in.

UpMyStreet.com had some interesting information about areas on it. We found it quite useful.

I would tell your parents that they can move into their smaller house when you've gone...How bad of them to make you feel guilty.

YANBU but i can see straight through their blather - they are upset that you are leaving. They probably like having you there, despite how difficult it is. Thats all - dont be too hurt by it.

YANBU.

Congratulations on getting the job!

You should easily be able to rent a decent house near Wakey for £450.00 a month!

hi muffins im from leeds but know wakefield well there is a little place about 5 to 10 mins outsice wakefield city center called outwood that is nice it has a good school called rooksnest which was top of the tables and also has a pre school for aged 2 yrs and pinders isnt far either also it has its own train station/stop so easy acsess to dewsbury and wakie as we call it is a good night out any way hope this helps and good look ...

Congratulations on the new job !

Congratulations on the new job and the new start for you both.

I think it will be good for you to move a bit away from your parents.

When they were looking at houses they should have asked you what you plans were and made decisions based on that, they didn't, they assumed you wouldn't be able to stand on your own two feet (seems they like depending on them, probably makes them feel good, important) and now you are they are having to reassess their opinion of you. I don't like their attitude (did you guess?? [grin). Wanting to keep the money so they don't miss out on the rent if you don't go...
bloody charming.

Don't feel guilty, go up there, make a good life for yourself and LIVE YOUR LIFE!! x

Congratulations on the new job.

Just a query regarding your mum "saving" for you... Is there any chance that she may turn around in the future and say sorry had to use it to cover x bill, so you won't be able to have it this month????

If there is any chance of this scenario you need to take steps now to put bits aside, so you know your future is secured.

Good Luck and it sound like your move is very much needed!

That's exactly what I was thinking Doris.....

Congratulations btw Muffins and Good Luck

Ossett is an ok area to live in, its between Dewsbury and Wakefield, I wouldn't bother with Dewsbury itself mind. I'll send Phoenix over here with recommendations, she's Barnsley Based.

doris - i thought that too! OP - dont rely on that money! what if they dont give it to you? maybe to stop you going?

Congrats on the job and good luck with the move.

Would your new employers pay some relocation costs?