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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to refuse to serve a man with a weird skin condition?

100 replies

weebump · 24/03/2009 22:31

Now, before I get jumped on, I am putting myself into the shoes of this shop assistant who refused to serve my sisters FIL. Here's the scenario:

FIL has a badly disfigured face. He also has a flakey skin rash thing on his hand. He was buying something in a well known chain store and just about to hand over his money when the woman at the till said, "Sorry, I can't serve you". He's a bit deaf, thought she had said something else, asked her to repeat it. Again she refused to handle money from him. It was because of his hand.

FIL, starting to feel a bit anxious about this now, noticed the big queue behind him and felt really embarrassed. They all started to back away from him.

He asked to see the supervisor. She came along, saw what the situation was and responded. She said the woman on the till had every right to refuse to serve him.

FIL left the store, wobbly with embarrassment and rage, but frozen in stiff-upper-lipness.

Was she right to refuse him? Can you believe she did this, and her supervisor backed her up?

OP posts:
snice · 24/03/2009 22:54

Sorry but molluscum is contagious which is why its called molluscum contagiosum

FairLadyRantALot · 24/03/2009 22:59

snice....don't think OP has that, though? Or have I missed something?

snice · 24/03/2009 23:00

I was referring to littlelamb's post

Original poster
weebump · 24/03/2009 23:00

littlelamb mentioned it.

OP posts:
TheYearOfTheCat · 24/03/2009 23:00

Yep, definite breach of Disability Discrimination Act, which extends to the provision of Goods, Facilities and Services (ie being served in a shop).

And Outrageous Treatment.

A strongly worded letter to the Head office pointing this out & asking them what they are going to do about it is in order. If your FIL doesn't get a decent response, he should contact the Equality & Human Rights Commission for advice.

The annoying thing is, often people who receive this sort of treatment are understandably very reluctant to take issues further because of the embarassment factor.

What a dreadful experience for your FIL.

littlelamb · 24/03/2009 23:00

snice, I was told that it was a negligable risk, as I did worry about it being contagious. I admit, I had never heard of it before ds had it and I do worry what people will think

snice · 24/03/2009 23:01

Its spread by skin to skin contact

NotanOtter · 24/03/2009 23:02

too sad
when i was little - children used to not want to hold my hands because they were rough and cracked with eczema

FairLadyRantALot · 24/03/2009 23:02

I meant Op's FIL

also, I have read, that whilst molluscum is contagious, that most people are immune to the virus and therefore danger of infections is very rare....

littlelamb · 24/03/2009 23:04

It's an interesting point though- if my ds is contagious, would the shopkeeper then have had a point in not serving him?! Are we more upset about the reaction or the assumption?

snice · 24/03/2009 23:05

Sorry-didn't mean to hijack thread onto another topic.

Weebump - I think the treatment of your FIL was apalling

snice · 24/03/2009 23:06

as is my spelling

Original poster
weebump · 24/03/2009 23:09

Well, that's what I was trying to imagine. If I was the shop assistant, and someone with flakey horrible skin was about to hand over some money, could I refuse to serve them? Do shops reserve the right to refuse to serve people? Is it enough to judge it risky to handle their money in case they're infectious?

OP posts:
trixymalixy · 24/03/2009 23:11

I would be absolutely livid about this. They definitely need to take this further.

alicecrail · 24/03/2009 23:11

I think its appalling. Basically they wouldn't take money from him because he had touched it - is that right? My god, i would hate to think of the germs and diseases that are on notes and coins! People going to the loo and not washing their hands, then using money, or coughing into their hands. Surely that would be more of a risk than some flaky skin?! I would definitely make a fuss, your poor fil!

Original poster
weebump · 24/03/2009 23:12

...in case they're infectious? what happened to my italics there?

OP posts:
FairLadyRantALot · 24/03/2009 23:13

hm...should a person with Aids be served in a shop, or should the shop be able to refuse to serve someone with Aids?
Hmm, I really don't think it is right for anyone to refuse service in a shop....and anyway, how many people are, invisibly, infectious...?

TheDevilWearsPrimark · 24/03/2009 23:13

That's awful, I wish he'd been able to stand up for himself there and then.

My Grandmother often told a horrible story. When she was in her 20's she worked as a cinema usher. One girl who's husband had been killed in service (WW2) and had four children was sacked after she developed psoriasis. He apparantly just sent her straight home one night saying she looked like a fat dinosaur and would put the customers off.

onagar · 24/03/2009 23:21

I think it must have been really awful to have been turned away like that.

On the other hand I can see how they felt behind the counter too.

In an ideal world you could trust someone who did have a contagious disease not to be offering to touch you, but in the real world I don't think you can.

I can usually think of a 'right' answer, but I'm not so sure here. Obviously we don't want anyone to be turned away like that so maybe shop assistents should wear gloves and wash their gloved hands a lot or maybe it should be customary to put money on the counter to avoid skin to skin contact?

Solidgoldbrass. I usually agree with you, but I think it's a bit silly to suggest that they train their supervisors to know the difference between a skin condition and a dangerous infectious disease. A doctor can't tell just from looking and it's probably not practical to expect everyone to have a medical qualification to work in a pound shop.

DaisyMooSteiner · 24/03/2009 23:31

How absolutely horrible.

2rebecca · 24/03/2009 23:32

It's against the disability discrimination act. I would complain officially and go to citizens advice.

2rebecca · 24/03/2009 23:35

Molluscum contagiosum is only mildly infectious, much like warts. It can last a year or so there's no point taking it seriously and quarenteening kids. Adults rarely catch it. My son had it and no-one else got it. He's the only 1 in the family with eczema though and eczema kids get it more often and more severely. He still went swimming etc.

mumeeee · 24/03/2009 23:35

No she was not right to refuse to serve him and the superviser should not have backed her up. It ia illegal.

shonaspurtle · 24/03/2009 23:45

I worked in retail for many years and served customers with facial disfigurements and skin conditions of various types. Good god, it would never have crossed my mind for a second to refuse to serve someone .

Yes, it was a little off-putting if you'd seen someone sneeze into their hand and then use that same hand to pass you a damp tenner, but thems the breaks. I can't think of any skin conditions tbh off the top of my head that would be that infectious.

She was very rude and ignorant and that shop needs customer service training. What did she think it was? Leprosy? Plague? The King's Evil?

littlelamb · 24/03/2009 23:47

2rebecca, that's interesting as my ds has excema too but noone's ever mentioned the link between the 2.