bullying problem - what to do?

[MLP]

Hi. I have a little three year old girl, who I obviously think is the greatest. She is a sweet kid, much like other little girls (and boys) that age. We live in central London and have recently started to encounter a real problem with a nasty little bully of a boy (probably about 6 or 7) who happens to be at a lot of the same playgrounds and jungle gyms that we attend. He will typically hit my daughter (jab fingers, punch, throw hard plastic balls in her face from close range at the jungle gym, call her "poo", hit me, etc). I have had words with her father (a shaven headed individual) who doesn't seem to see there is any problem with his bigger son repeatedly hit my smaller daughter. I am at a loss as to what to do. I get sick to my stomach when I see them, they always come up to us and taunt us and physically abuse us. I obviously can't push the kid away, words don't mean anything to him and his father is a yob. Any thoughts on what to do? All I know is his first name and the school he attends.

Whats a jungle gym? If its an establishment I would report them to whoever is in charge, they may ask him to leave.
I would also be having very strong words with the father.
With the playground, can you try and go at different times?

A jungle gym is an indoor play area with slides, climbing area, and a big pit of balls which you can play in. It's great fun for the kids 99% of the time (except when someone is a bully). I had very strong words with the dad at the jungle gym last week and the woman who supervises intervened to tell us to cool it in front of the kids. After the dad and the boy left the supervisor said to me that the boy is a complete pain and is always fighting with kids but she doesn't seem to have the ability/guts to kick him out (she is quite young - early 20s - and the dad is probably in his 30s and quite big so I can sympathise with her to some extent).

I do try to avoid them but it's not ideal having to second guess when to go to the playground in your area - it's not always clear when they will be there.

Does anyone think it is worth writing to the school or is that a complete waste of time as it is out of school hours/their supervision?

Sorry - completely sympathaise but school will not want to know - sounds like you are doing everything you could do ....

That's what I thought but it is a real pain. One of the moments that stand out is when I complained to the father re the kid firing the plastic balls in my daughter's face was his reply - "He only hit her twice"

The courts are full of men who think it's ok to hit women "only twice" and we wonder where it starts.

What a horrible situation. I would be very angry too.

There are only two ways to go IMO - the distateful one of making friends with the family so they start to like your daughter and leave her alone (personally I would find this too galling, although I might force myself to make some small talk to test the water), or gang up against them with a bunch of other parents, including some blokes, and get them chucked out of the places you like to go.

Tough one though.

Hi MLP How bloody unfair and horrible. Just wondering exactly how you have approached it with the boy himself . What exactly have you said to him? The reason I ask is that I have 2 DSs age 5 and 8 (not thugs, I hasten to add), and I MIGHT be inclined to talk to the boy first. Maybe I can help you with what to say to him ?

It also sounds as if this boy may have Special needs, as this is very unusual for someone this age

sounds like the boy is behaving like the father like father like son as the saying goes.hard situation though approach the dad and say unless he speaks to the son you will get the police involved as the parent he will be responsible for his sons behavior.