My husband is needs to make small talk more

[Cookiemg]

We are expecting our first baby in two weeks time and we have been attending NCT antenatal classes. throughout the pregnancy I have noticed my husband's lack of being able to do small talk. We have known each other for 3 years and most of the time has been a party, we are both very independent people and all individual and joint activities have involved both of us getting drunk, which of course loosens everyone up. This is the most extensive period of non hedonism and I seem to be focussing on all his flaws. The NCT classes are a perfect way of getting to know couples our age with children ( I have a huge fear of being isolated when baby arrives). All the men seem to have bonded and I feel as though my partner is a spare part, I have bonded with the women. He says that men bond better at the pub and the classes are for learning stuff rather than socialising. Do I have a life of social suicide in front of me?

my dh is like this. A complete social fuckwit (mine, that is)

You need to make your own girlfriends and socialise with them without partners.

I do have a lot of girlfriends that I socialise with but I wanted him to the 'happy couple' thing

The happy couple thing is hard to find at the best of times...its a lovely idea but maybe it feels a bit forced on him cos it is what you want and out of his social comfort zone he feels awkward and unable to be himself?

My DH can be a bit like this and I can imagine that if we had done antenatal classes he would have been the same.

We are expats and move around a lot so have needed to make new friends quite a few times. I tend to make friends easily but DH doesn't. Some people find him hard going initially but it is just shyness/akwardness. Usually better when drink is involved. DH feels better on his own territory and loves having people over so we do that quite a lot.

Maybe suggest going for a meal one night with the group?

My DH is the same. He always says that his parents used to answer for him when someone talked to him so it made him shy and awkward around strangers. He still finds it difficult to chat to new people.

He is quite sucessful in his job and can talk in a professional situation fluently but feels out of his comfort zone in a social situation.

I accept him as he is and try to smooth over the initial awkwardness. Once he gets to know someone he is fine, and can chat away and have a good time. Friends often say that they never knew how good fun he can be, he comes across as slightly boring and very reserved.

Invite some of your friends over for a meal, ideally the DH should be one that your DH has something in common, whether professionally, or a hobby.

It takes practice, DH is getting better. We are expats too so that is helping, as he has to be a bit more outgoing.