Probably BU, resentful at DP

[SnakeRiverConspiracy]

I should start this by pointing out I may be being a tad harsh, as have a 3 week old DC and am very sleep-deprived!

I am getting really resentful of my DP. We've been together 4 years, and have two DCs (3 years and 3 weeks old).

We were invited to DP's cousin's wedding in Scotland (DC2 will be 7 weeks old and I'm BFing). As I injured my back during labour I duly booked first class train seats (better padding) costing £150, and reminded DP to book the time as holidays (writing it on the calendar, in his diary and telling him). He's just told me he forgot to book the holiday time and missed the 6-week notice period we need for him to get the time off, and the tickets are non-refundable. I did budget for the trip but it's galling that the money might be lost. Am hoping his company might still grant the leave anyway!

DP is already in my bad books for spending half of his paternity leave up til 4 am on Facebook, then sleeping for 10 hours in the day and complaining to me that he was sleep-deprived!

Tell him how it is and what he needs to do - he probably doesn't even realise!

YANBU
This would piss me off too.

YANBU.

and his good features are?....

YANBU

that's just so sad he was up till 4am on facebook as a new dad on paternity leave. What a loser. Sorry. But he really needs to shape up, doesn't he?

I'd certainly be expecting him to lobby his work hard to still get that time off - but if not YANBU to be very cross about him not getting organised enought to book leave.

YANBU you need to step up the training

Hope he gets his leave!

YANBU to be annoyed with him.

I do think that men suffer more from sleep deprivation though - perhaps its a hormonal thing but I find it much easier to wake up fully as soon as DS squawks.

My DP spends half the night on World of Warcraft. But he can do it with DS in one arm and it gets me out of a night feed so I don't mind!

I will impart the well known piece of MN advice.....

kick him in the cock.

Twice.

YANBU

My dh (who doesn't deserve a kick in the cock as a general rule), has done this on occasion - forgotten to book time off work. I now email him at work, marked URGENT, whenever the need arises.

Th facebook thing does deserve a good cock-kicking

In fairness I should have pointed out he works night shifts at a factory normally, so his sleep patterns are set to being awake at nights (hence not being able to sleep then)

Fabulous for night feeds then!!!

YANBU

But, surely he can speak to his line manager, explain the situation and they will relax the ridiculous 6 wk rule?

YANBU - he should have got the time off, and should still be trying to get it off especially as its his cousin.

If he is going to stay up till 4am on facebook, then he has absolutely no right to complain. Regardless of night shifts, he should be on paternity leave to spend time with hsi new baby and support you, not just sleep the same as he always would and do not a right lot to help.

Poor guys used to being up all night, he can't magically flip his body clock?

Surely utilising his wakefulness during the night by making him do baby-duty would be a better payback

I take back what I said about him being up at night