To want to snatch a toy off a 4 year old.....

[tessofthedurbervilles]

Well I am but worried that I am clearly no better than a child.
Four year old who I brought present for
parent 'say thank you for the present'
child 'no'
parent 'I said say thank you'
child 'no'
parent (looking mortified) 'please its a nice present'
child 'but I don't like her'

ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH I could have died on the spot....I wanted to take the present back and say 'well let me give it to a child that does like me you little horror'

Instead I swallowed the shame, gave a hollow laugh and said 'arh isn't he a sweet little thing'

Oh my god I will turn in to my parents .....argh!

tess you certainly will. I actually said to my 8 year old DS the other day that there are starving kids in Africa who would love to have his food , and I have no shame about saying it! (how sad that 30-odd years ago my mum was saying the same to me, and nothing's changed)

I would have taken it back...but i am a bitch

Thing is the mother is in a difficult position. 4 yr olds are very stubborn and unpredictable.
The most important thing is to avoid causing embarassment and awkwardness to the present giver.
I think the wisest thing would be to thank the giver on the child's behalf and talk to the child later and have her make a thank you card or phonecall.

katiestar. I totally agree. I would take this approach with a four year old. 4 year olds have not yet developed empathy.

If my 8 year old was ungrateful in this way, however, I might be inclined to do more of a kimi

YANBU - DSS's godmother brought him a present(no occasion, just saw it and thought he would like it) about 3-4 years ago (he was about 4.5). DSS said it was rubbish and shouted . His Godmother took it off him. His mother went off it at him and told EVERYONE (her family & friends and DH's family) he was not to be bought anything except at Xmas and birthday. He learnt his lesson!
Pity this parent didn't do something like that!

My neighbour had exactly this happen to her a couple of christmases ago and she took the toy (or Dr Who thingy) away from her nephew (6) and gave it to my ds (5).

My son terribly pleased for an afternoon - her nephew a changed child (and slightly more pleasant) for life.

Teaching manners is one of the best lessons a kid can be taught for future happiness imho

I have a 4 year old child and have to confirm that they are like that. I am ALWAYS reminding him to say "thanks", but he is often very impulsive and will just grab the thing at once. So I have had to tell him "If you cannot say "thanks" the lady/waiter/whoever will have to take it back" And it ALWAYS works. Even if he just mumbles the word.
But sometimes I can break in a cold sweat if it looks like it's going to backfire because he might add something embarrasing.