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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To consider booking our family holiday during 'term' time?

59 replies

ConnieComplaint · 13/03/2009 18:25

Hi,

I'm sure this comes up often but I just don't know what to do.

My dh & I both work full time. DD is 7 (year 3 at school) & ds is at playgroup (so his attendance isn't essential.

Anyway, we were planning our family holiday in July (when dd would be off on her holidays) but our c/minder told me today she is having a weeks holiday in June, leaving me with the dilemma of booking a week off in June & no family holiday in July.

I couldn't take two weeks off so close together as I need to spread the holidays out from April to April & dd has sports days & doctor appointments.. plus I need to keep some days so I can use them if the children are ill
So I am left with the option of booking the week in June off work & holidaying ourselves at this time..the problem there is dd is still at school... she doesn't finish until the last day of June.

Dh says she won't be learning anything at the end of the school term anyway & we'd be mad to miss out on our holiday because I am cautious of keeping holidays so I have the days if the children (or me!) are ill.

WWYD? I don't want the school on my back as dd has a very good attendance record thus far, and I know other children who go on holiday in February & June so it's not totally unheard of here... but I keep thinking we shouldn't take her out of school.

OP posts:
Nabster · 13/03/2009 18:27

I think your DH is talking nonsense and trying to justify taking his child out of school when he shouldn't.

YABU imo.

themildmanneredjanitor · 13/03/2009 18:28

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 13/03/2009 18:28

Could you get alternative childcare for the week in June?

themildmanneredjanitor · 13/03/2009 18:28

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herbietea · 13/03/2009 18:31

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Coldtits · 13/03/2009 18:31

Just go. You will get scores telling you not to, but I have booked us a June holiday without a second thought - it's the only way we will get one. It's one week and it will not hurt.

MaryMotherOfCheeses · 13/03/2009 18:31

We're trying to avoid tkaing DS out of school tbh. He's 7.

But I'm not averse to him missing two days around half term so we can have 10 days away.

Can you find alternative childcare to cover the CM? ours is going away shortly, DS is going to afterschool club.

Reallytired · 13/03/2009 18:32

I would go for it. You have a childcare crisis and you might as well enjoy a family. If the school complains then you can always point out that if they had an after school club you would not have to use a childminder and have this problem.

spicemonster · 13/03/2009 18:32

Oh gosh absolutely not. Your DD is 7, not 17. I really don't think it's an issue if they're in primary school.

ComeOVeneer · 13/03/2009 18:34

Tricky one. I can see your reasoning behind it, and most infant/primary schools it happens a fair bit. However, imo the fact that it is a school policy not to allow holidays in term time, means that if I did it I would be teaching my children that it is ok to disregard rules if it suits you, so for that reason alone I wouldn't do it.

Original poster
ConnieComplaint · 13/03/2009 18:40

No, we don't have the option of other childcare - hence using a childminder in the first place.

None of our family live close to us & aren't in the position to childmind, meaning the children would still have to have time off school to stay with family... (well my family anyway, DH's mum works full time but lives close by & often helps out when she can, but even I can't ask her to sacrifice a week of her holiday time for us!)

The afterschools club we have here isn't really an option as it's not ran by the school, but an outside body & is three miles away, leaving us with the problem of finding someone to drive dd there...but ds isn't old enough to go there so would still need someone to mind him.

OP posts:
Original poster
ConnieComplaint · 13/03/2009 18:41

COV, as far as I know there isn't a school policy saying they're not allowed time off. If there was I wouldn't even consider it, I hate breaking the rules

OP posts:
themildmanneredjanitor · 13/03/2009 18:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

spicemonster · 13/03/2009 18:43

Incidentally, I have the opposite problem - my CM takes her holiday in August so I'm forced to go away at the height of the school holidays and pay £££ when my DS is only 2.

Original poster
ConnieComplaint · 13/03/2009 18:53

SM, ours usually takes hers in July (same week as us) which is why we were going to book then... but at least she told me early enough before we had booked ours or I would have been left in a state.

I haven't checked flight prices yet but I think they are usually cheaper in June too.

MMJ, no dd isn't aware of school policies(but I don't think no holidays in term time is one)... I am on the PTA so should know these type of things

I just don't want to use all my days up.. last year a colleague used all her days on one holiday of a lifetime, lasting three weeks, before she would settle down & have a family.. she then had to have a lot of days off due to her mum needing taken to doctor appointments & she was away for a weekend..she had to use them as 'off' days & lose money for them.. I really can't afford to do that so would rather my days be utilised as best as possible.

Thank you all for your advice, I do appreciate it. It's hard when you've never done this before & with dd being my first at school I have no idea if it's frowned upon by other parents or teachers. I do know though that a girl in dd's class has a holiday home in Spain where they go twice a year in term time.

OP posts:
hedgiemum · 13/03/2009 18:56

Hi Conniecomplaint,
Talk to the school about y3 child before you do anything else! (At our school we are encouraged to email the headmaster on this issue). Explain in writing very succinctly, as you've done to us, emphasisng that you won't get a family summer holiday if you can't go that week, but also saying that you are so happy with your DC's progress and that you don't want to do anything that would slow that down. Say you know that the last week of term often contains end of term parties etc.. so they would potentially miss less academic work than usual, but that you understand that this is potentially disruptive to your child and the rest of the class, and that it would be very much a one off and you wouldn't do the same thing in future years. Say that you would take all the work they would miss for them to do in the holidays.
When I sent an email containing the above, with loads of notice, school were very supportive. When parents spring it on school last minute they are furious!

RockinSockBunnies · 13/03/2009 18:58

I'm thinking of taking DD out of school during term-time next year (Yr 4), for a variety of reasons. We've never done it before, she has excellent attendance otherwise and thus I'm not going to feel too bad about it. Nor should you.

As an aside, though, is it possible to ask your local authority for a list of other childminders in the area that might be able to fill in for you during that week in June? Or does your DD have any friends that have a nanny/au pair/SAHM that wouldn't mind filling in for you for a week? If you're on the PTA could you use your contacts and see if anyone might be willing to help out?

Fleurlechaunte · 13/03/2009 19:15

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest. Have done so and will continue to do so.

What TMMJ said.

slowreadingprogress · 13/03/2009 19:21

I'm with Fleur TMMJ and others. Would do this without a single worry. We have a week away in May - same week in school holidays is literally double the price.

I think family holidays away together are special and precious and I judge that missing 5 days of school in one academic year is well worth it. In fact I think to find this a problem you'd have to be seriously anal

MilaMae · 13/03/2009 19:27

I'm doing it in June too.

Mil has booked a holiday we could never afford to celebrate several things that fall in the week. The dc have a good attendance record are doing well and I'm an ex teacher so more than capable of covering anything(as are most parents).

The things they'll learn that week will be far more beneficial imho. If they were always off and struggling I'd maybe understand if the school was unhappy but personally I think the value of travel experience for children is hugely undervalued and outweighs anything covered during a school week.

I also think more parents are going to have to consider this during the next couple of years whilst the credit crunch rolls on.

I personally don't see why kids with good attendance records should be deprived of a week away just because of some rule that has been brought about to try and reduce the amount of families that abuse the system regularly ie the kids that are kept off every other week for the most spurious of reasons.

Go for it

FiveGoMadInDorset · 13/03/2009 19:27

Just do it. We will be when DD is at school and will do it with no qualms.

SugarBird · 13/03/2009 19:30

Go and have a lovely guilt-free holiday! It's only one week and agree that your DD will probably learn loads that she wouldn't be learning in school. Can't see the problem with this (prob why we took ours out and home educated after year 4 instead... )

jobschmob · 13/03/2009 19:53

Had to take my son out for four weeks (to go very very overseas), he is seven and I'm sure he has caught up with anything missed.

nkf · 13/03/2009 20:08

Would you take them out in secondary school? Question addressed to those who are relaxed about term time holidays.

Coldtits · 13/03/2009 20:14

Yes.

I'd take them out until their GCSEs.

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