to think "I didn't want to know that"

[clumsymum]

At my F I L's funeral yesterday. After the service we went back to S I L s house for buffet and interminable cups of tea.

S I L told everyone about her son in law (following me so far? ), who is going to have his vasectomy reversed, becos her daughter has decided they want another baby. we know when, where and how much he's paying for the operation.

Now I didn't know he had ever had the snip, didn't want to, and didn't need to know this. Her daughter then told everyone what the new baby will be called, and how they're extending the house to accommodate said child.

However are they going to feel if the planned conception doesn't occur?

When we were 'trying' for ds, we wouldn't have told a soul, and in fact told no-one until after 12 weeks pg, incase anything went wrong.

But it's their business how much thry want to share.

Is it really going to damage you knowing this stuff?

(we kept schtum til 12 week scan btw)

Funeral's always seem to bring out the strange side in people.

No, not something I would want to know, here's hoping the reversal is a success else they are going to be terribly disappointed.

Would you prefer your conversations be be based upon 'need to know' or interest/ concern?

Why don't you want to know about your in-laws and their plans for their house and family?

Was said SonIL present? He would have been the poor bloke hiding in the corner, scarlet with embarrassment!

"Is it really going to damage you knowing this stuff?"

I'm not suggesting it'll damage ME at all, I just think that it's excrutiatingly embarrassing, for me, the others who were told, and I suspect later for the couple concerned (esp. if it doesn't work).

No, the son in law wasn't there. He couldn't take the time off work, as he's booked time off for the procedure in the near future.

Sorry, the question was were you BU to think you didn't want to know it, so I responded to that.

I'm baffled about what the problem is tbh. You can't dictate how much other people choose to share their personal information.

Oh, sorry.

Just re-read op, you mean it wasn't her but her daughter and SILs details? Yeah, it's a bit off I guess unless thry're happy for everyone to know.

I think at funerals people like to focus on the future
Hope the couple didn't mind all that being shared tough, were they there?

excrutiating embarrassing? really?? how odd!

It might be embarrassing to attend your SIL's vasectomy, but just to know that he is having one - what's the issue? It's a basic procedure that loads of people have. I don't get the embarrassment factor.

My nephew introduced my DH (before he was the DH - he was at that time the DF) to his dad (my BIL) with "Hello Auntie L, hello Uncle T. Daddy's had a vasectomy." Given it was the first time DH had met my sister and BIL they were mortified. The DH smiled sweetly at my nephew, shook the BIL's hand and said how nice it was to meet him.
Was it TMI? My nephew was 7 yrs old at the time and didn't really get the full implications of the statement, so I would say no (not from our point of view - the sister and BIL probably saw it VERY differently). In your situation? I would say so, the SonIL isn't there and announcing such matters at a wake is not really the done thing!! AS for announcing to the world that you're trying (or your daughter and SonIL are trying) - hell no!! We didn't tell anyone we were trying - it puts too much pressure on you and if something goes wrong and it doesn't work, it leads to lots of awkward questions!!