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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that schools should do more to help kids stay healthy?

55 replies

BatmansWilly · 11/03/2009 09:54

Just lately I've noticed my 14 year old son putting on a lot of weight. He was normally very trim but I put it down to puberty etc.

Then last weekend he got weighed for his karate competition and he was too heavy for the catagory he was entered for! The judges very kindly 'doctored' the entry forms and allowed him to go into the 'heavy-weight' catagory.

He was mortified.

I just couldn't understand how he had put on so much weight.

So we went through his daily diet, trying to see what had changed.

Breakfast - bowl of cereal, 2 slices of toast, glass of orange - all fine there ...

10am at school - A bacon buttie and a packet of crisps!!?!

Lunch - Burger/Pizza and chips, a chocolate cake, a packet of crisps and a can of coke.

Inbetween lessons maybe 3/4 times a day - a snickers bar from the vending machine ...

3.10pm - A bacon buttie before whatever club he was going to.

-----

So I know DS has his own mind and should have the sense to eat properly but surely it's not a great idea to be offering unlimited bacon butties, chocolates, burgers etc to teenagers??

No wonder he's getting bloody fat

OP posts:
LauriefairycakeeatsCupid · 11/03/2009 09:57

how about no money into school so he can't buy 4 snickers bars, crisps and coke.

The bacon buttie is the least of your worries tbh.

2shoes · 11/03/2009 09:59

it is not down to the school
sorry been there...
ds went through the fat stage,
he is 17 now and lost it all

edam · 11/03/2009 09:59

Blimey, I thought schools were bashing them all over the head with healthy eating messages these days (usually half-cocked like banning chocolate but permitting 'healthy' cereal bars that are actually high in fat and sugar).

And I thought vending machines selling confectionary and crisps had been banned? And school meals had to be healthy?

edam · 11/03/2009 10:00

Hopefully the shock of being in the wrong category at karate might make him less keen on snickers, crisps and bacon butties?

Original poster
BatmansWilly · 11/03/2009 10:00

I didn't realise he was spending so much on crappy food ...

the bacon butties are only 50p each, his lunch is £1.60 so I have been giving him £2.50 a day. The rest of the money has been spent from paper-round earnings

OP posts:
ConnorTraceptive · 11/03/2009 10:01

Send him with only enough money for his lunch and one snack.

Original poster
BatmansWilly · 11/03/2009 10:01

p.s. that sounds like I knew he was buying bacon butties ... I didn't.

OP posts:
ConnorTraceptive · 11/03/2009 10:05

well if he was mortified by the experience at karate then hopefully that is a good basis talk to him about his eating.

LauriefairycakeeatsCupid · 11/03/2009 10:05

Ok, how about a diary or a board in the kitchen to record what his 5-7-a-day fruit/veg are.

I wouldn't make a big deal about this (even if you think it's your fault don't beat yourself up). I would just point out that generally calories not used up = weight gain. Count up what he's eating in a day - I'm guessing that's about 4500-5000 a day, 1600 calories of that is junk

Record your own fruit/veg intake on the board (the whole family's would be great) as then you are moving into eating more healthily as a family.

Sugar is very addictive in my opinion so it may take a while to change the habits.

I don't think it is the school's responsibility as they just reflect the wider world - I think it is your families responsibility to make good choices.

nametaken · 11/03/2009 10:06

nothing wrong with the school selling bacon butties but I thought they were doing away with all the crappy vending machines.

Can you just givehim £2.10 per day for lunch and a bacon sandwich and (at least for a while) make him pay for some of his own clothes and activities so he's not spending all his paperround money on junk.

TBH at 14, he should be taking the responsibility for healthy eating on himself, sorry.

Gorionine · 11/03/2009 10:07

Ultimately it is OUR (parents) responsability, not the school's to "do more to keep our own kids healthy"! I am aware to be in a minority who thinks so though.

Original poster
BatmansWilly · 11/03/2009 10:14

No you're right, it isn't the schools fault.

I was just a bit upset because he has always been so fit and active. He seems to be turning into a slob.

He used to do karate 3 times a week, he's cut that down to 2 and then moans that he can't be bothered those 2 nights. He used to go swimming on a weekend, not he stays in bed until he has to get up and then slobs on the PC all day.

He did terribly in the competition because he was so out of breath and heavy.

I just hate to see him such a state. I'm disapointed with myself that I have let this go on unnoticed too

OP posts:
ConnorTraceptive · 11/03/2009 10:15

I'm with you gorionine. IME experience when schools ban tuck shops kids just go to the local shop and stock up before school

LauriefairycakeeatsCupid · 11/03/2009 10:20

How about limiting pc time.

Part of the slobbiness is sugar addiction I think, it makes you tired and unmotivated. And once you get a bit fat it's really hard to have the desire to change it.

Try not to be disappointed with yourself for too long. Just make small changes and stick with them - do it together.

You will ultimately model this good behaviour.

Gorionine · 11/03/2009 10:21

BatmansWilly, if he was very active and is now less, do you think this could be what has made him put weight on rather than his diet?

cory · 11/03/2009 10:22

Yes, but if the schools had something like a voucher system for lunches, then parents could keep more control by not sending any money in. I do think some 11yos are too young to be responsible for their own healthy eating.

And even some primary schools I know have a cafeteria/cash system, so you're expecting a 6yo to take responsibility for their eating.

lljkk · 11/03/2009 10:25

This is a great opportunity for OP's DS to learn about self-discipline and healthy eating. Outside of school he'll have even MORE unhealthy options. Teenagers and their parents make mistakes which (gasp, shock!) they need to not condemn themselves for but learn from instead.

So don't feel too bad, OP. I've decided that DS2 (only 4yo) is a bit of a chunkster, I'm starting to do various things to try to slim him down a bit. I think DS2 will always have a bit of predisposition towards being heavy.

OrmIrian · 11/03/2009 10:29

Bacon butty - not a problem in my book. Other stuff is. Ours has no vending machine and the canteen only has reasonably healthy food. No chips at all.

I think the school should do away with the vending machines but other than that I'm afraid it's down to you and your son. Perhaps a bigger breakfast - more protein might help. How about a boiled egg or some grilled bacon, or porridge even. Cereal and toast isn't that filling really.

OrmIrian · 11/03/2009 10:32

cory - my nephews school has a card for lunches. Parents put so much on it every week and the card only allows the child to choose from certain foods. DN was having the healthier option every day but spending pocket money on pizza on the way home Which indicates to me that more food of the right kind of food is required, and it's the quality of the food that they are choosing is the problem. Teenage boys eat a lot and need a lot - but just not junk.

plusonemore · 11/03/2009 10:34

the school is at fault and not following the new guidelines from the government here I would ask the school what they are doing to ensure they are following these (vending machines are meant to be gone)Equally though you are right your ds needs to learn to make good choices, but not easy when all that is on offer!

swanriver · 11/03/2009 10:36

I'm finding my 8 year old is much plumper than he was at 6 despite doing lots of afterschool sport and having PE twice a week. He's bad at football, tennis etc. The problem is that naturally inactive children move less fast in playground and doing sport, they are worse at sport anyway so have no real incentive to run. I don't really know how the school could make him fitter except by having an enforced run every day. And for that they would need a running track nearby. I notice that the thin fit kids are constantly leaping around, the fatter kids tend not to do that anyway. So fit children will use break efficiently for exercise, whereas fatter children won't. I try and take them to the playground to runaround alot after school but there is always the problem of homework, tea etc, so you can't stay out for long.
Does anyone have ideas how to get children who are bad at sport to exercise sufficiently?

expatinscotland · 11/03/2009 10:37

No, I don't think schools should do more to help kids stay healthy.

I think that's the parents' job.

The school's there obsensibly to teach them to read, write, do maths, etc. Not be a parent.

Original poster
BatmansWilly · 11/03/2009 10:39

Swanriver, my DS is dyspraxic so was/is very bad at sports.

However he was good at swimming (not great but ok) which is an excellent form of exercise and when he joined karate (at the age of 9) it improved his balance and co-ordination dramatically.

Have you thought about martial arts for him?

OP posts:
swanriver · 11/03/2009 10:39

I agree with OrmIrian with ravenous hunger of boys (and girls?). They need something and it can't be carrot sticks, but I suppose it could be a big sandwich with lots of protein and salad in it, or a flapjack rather than chocolate bars.

compo · 11/03/2009 10:41

is there any sport he enjoys that you could all do as a family at the weekends to get him out of bed and off the PC
like long walks in the woods, by the sea, rounders, cricket, cycling as a family with a healthy picnic