ds2 is 9 his best friend is a girl. Can she come for a sleepover?

[roisin]

ds2 is 9 his best friend is a girl. Can she come for a sleepover?
ds2 has bunkbeds in his room.

I say yes.
dh says the boys would have to sleep in the bunks, and the friend would have to go in ds1's room.

Yes

They should be able to sleep in the same room surely?

yes, so long as parents are happy. i'd put them both in bunks.... otherwise the whole fun of a sleepover (from dcs pov) is removed really..... they're only 9 and presumably prepubescent.....what would your dh say to ds2 to explain his decision??

i think Dh plan is a good one. my DD is a youngish 9yo with two brothers and she woudl be embarrased about a boy seeing her pants. I have no ideas why. her brothers dont count as they are younger but her dad does

At this age no probs girl sahring room with boy.
Another few years then no.

why not do sleeping bags in the lounge?

YANBU

My 9 year old dd's best friend is a boy and I would be fine with them in bunkbeds in the same room.

Yes, we went on holiday with dss and took his friend who is agirl and they slept inthe same room for the week.

now he is 12 they don't want to share a room!

I would say yes to them sharing a room. We had this with DS last year (good family friend's DD who is 9). However agree about the gettign undressed thing - she got changed into PJs in the bathroom.

yes

Yes let them share a room. Putting too much thought into this not a criticism but an observation. My DS1 is 11 and innocent as hell..but has had the birds and bees talk, the STI talk, the preg talk, he knows it all, but is such a kind and open boy its amazing asked about having a girl the same age for a sleepover.. i have arranged a sleepover at his nans, she has enough room for seperate rooms to sleep in but they can spend the day together messing about in the countryside ect, so yes, i would agree to it personally at the age they are at.

This is remarkably unanimous for AIBU.
Does no-one want to disagree with me?
Thanks for all your comments.

Tent and sleeping bags also brilliant ideas

i'm not at that stage yet, but are sleep overs necessary? can't children just go home and sleep in their own beds?

oh god

9? Fine in my view.

Two of my friends' 11/12 yr olds (B & G) are very good friends and their parents are just contemplating not letting them share a bed any more on sleepovers. They are both "little kids" iyswim, both a long way from puberty.

13 and I'd be seriously considering the individual children and their levels of physical maturity.

let them share no problem at all.

I was best friends with a boy at 13 and almost lived at his house over the summer, staying over once a week. NOTHING ever happend. Ok so turns out he came out some years later(as did i) but thats irrelevant. We are still friends 15 years later and I adore him.

They are 9...my neice is that age and very young. Tho she wouldnt want a boy for a best freind!

They will be fine sharing at 9 years old.

Ask them what they'd like and ask her parents. We often have sleepovers camped out in the living room.

I think they get uncomfortable with the idea long before they start to think of it exciting in that teenage way.
I think that as long as they seem unfazed by it then you should be too.

Absolutely. If she's uncomfortable she won't come.

DD - 9 1/2 has been doing sleepovers for years with boys. We are also friends with the parents - maybe it seems strange if this is a new thing?

They wear their pyjamas and sleep in the same room.

There is no embarassment yet

Yes, it is totally fine. I shared rooms even beds with male friends in my early teens and beyond and nothings sexual happened nor it was expected to.