.....to hope that my nieces and nephews send a thank you card when i send them gifts

[ilovespagbol]

ok a card might be seen as old fashioned but surely its polite to send some sort of acknowledgement? what do others do? the youngest is six, oldest is 13.

I don't think YABU at all.
My nieces & nephews never write thank you cards/letters. Well, actually I think they do, but not to family .
Makes me livid to be honest, i think it's really rude, but I think it's how you are brought up.
I write them for DS (1) because I feel they're important and good manners. I do look forward to the day he can write his own tho!

I never receive any kind of thank you for Xmas or birthday presents from my DH's three nephews (the younger ones - DBIL's second family). We never receive any acknowledgment at all. We were told a few years ago that they prefer cash to presents. They get the cash but still no thank you.

The (adult) nephew and neice do send thank you cards.

I always send thank you cards on behalf of DS. I was raised that way.

i think there neds to be some kind of thank you for gifts

a squibble from a toddler and a few words thnaks from older child

its just basic good manners

scribble

Either they draw a picture and write thankyou on it, or they ring to say it.

I write cards on behalf of DS (nearly 3) to everyone. Before he was born, I used to write thank you cards to people who gave me gifts. The only thank you's we have ever received are from children of friends - never from DH's 4 nieces and nephews.
I'm not really picky about it being written either - a phone call or a text would do!
YANBU.

I dont send thank you cards , neither do i return rsvp's for party invites! , none of my friends do either.

In this day and age, a simple text or phonecall is all you need imo.

I don't expect cards, but the odd thankyou would be nice. I never get that either mind you. I always say thanks and will certainly get my kids to when they're old enough. Courtesy and manners really.

I have never made mine send thank you cards, and I was never expected to send them. Personally I think that gift giving should be unconditional, but it's very much a family tradition thing - if you were always made to do it then you expect others to do it. It may be polite, but if it is done out of duty and expectation then it doesn't really mean anything.

My DS (9) saw my mother this weekend for the first since last year. She posted his christmas present to him because she was unwell over Christmas and didn't visit. When she came over on Sunday, bearing in mind that Christmas was light years away in the life of a small boy, he gave her a big hug and said 'Oh, by the way Grandma, thank you so much for my present. I know I spoke to you on the phone and thanked you at the time, but I haven't seen you, so I just wanted to tell you again how much I loved it.'

Well, that was completely unexpected and unprompted, and I was SOOO proud of him. So I didn't stand over him in early January while he worked his way through a pile of agonising two line letters out of some middle class sense of duty, but my Mum now knows that he has genuine manners, and that he was truly appreciative of her gift.

YANBU. I rarely see my nieces and nephew but last year I sent them all presents. Didn't even get a thank-you email or text from the parents. This year I won't bother!

Well receiving a delivered present from someone you do not see is a bit different.

I always write a thank you for ds' received presents and always get one from my nieces. It's how I was brought up and I believe it's what should be done. I even write little notes to ds' friends that we see every week. We do not get them back tho' and have received a text for a present given recently which was quite special. I wish a card had been written, as a text doesn't count in my book (takes 20 seconds to do....where's the effort?) I think it's a symbol of life these days - I had real problems finding any thank you cards in supermarkets and Smiths after Xmas (not sold out, just not there). Seems nobody sends them anymore!!

I send my nieces and nephew presents every xmas and birthdays. My 2 nieces always send really sweet thank you cards. I rarely hear anything from my other niece and nephew -ages 7 and 10yrs. Their parents never phone or aknowledge receiving the gifts. I sometimes wonder if they ever get them. Did get informed one year that the boden outfit for my niece looked too small. Maybe they just don't like boden, lol.
I always write thankyou cards for my ds, 1.6 and dd 3.3. Older relatives always seem really pleased.

Thank you cards are good manners. I do them, and my LO will do them. However, I think the 'give and let go' policy is a good one. Especially in this day when TY notes are falling out of fashion, I save myself the angst of expecting one. Also, maybe 'give and let go' thing helps me to focus on the giving part and less on the potential politickin of gift-giving?

Just wanted to say "thank you" for this thread. I've been becoming increasingly hurt that I've sent Christmas and birthday presents to my 3 nephews and nieces every year (the oldest is about to be 17) and never had a thank you or any sort of acknowledgement either from them or their parents; neither have I ever had a birthday card/ present/ phone call from them for my children. (eldest now 15) though in recent years they have sent Christmas presents. The idea of a charity gift was genius - I took sometime to choose a gift appropriate to my niece, who is doing A level Art - so I bought a gift of 1,000 pencils for a school via UNICEF.
I feel that I've taken time and thought to choose something that chimes with her interests but also that the gift will be appreciated by the recipients of the pencils. Success (I hope).