to find fault with friends as I get older?

[debs40]

I don't know what happened...

I was a liberal, tolerant kinda gal in my 20s

I kept in touch with a close group of friends and made new ones in my 30s.

Now, I've turned 40 (and a bit more!) and I find that I get ground down by people's personalities crap more and more as time goes by.

I know, I know...I have many flaws myself. But what happened? Almost everyone from my close group has turned into a mortgage/home extension/home equity babbling bore all twittering on about how they'd like to work less or work around their children but how they 'couldn't afford it' on combined incomes of +100k in recession proof jobs.

Blah de blah blah blah....

Oh and of course, there's always the right way to do everything from what you feed your child, to where you holiday to the wine you drink...and don't get me started on 'the right school'...so important if you're working long hours and don't have time to read to your child yourself

I've known some of these folk for 20 years. What did I miss?

How many friends do you have? I find the older I am then the more 'aquantances' I have, but the true friends remain the same - I just have (slowly) learnt to agree to disagree.

Although my parenting skills are excellent and my kids perfect not all my friends agree with me , live and let live is my motto these days. If you don't agree with their ways of thinkind just ignore them!

I was much more critical in my twenties.

I find I'm a wee bit kinder now but more able to sort wheat from chaff much quicker so I don't need to be with people who get on my nerves. No time for that.

Mmmm, interesting. I suppose that's my line of thought. I've got two particular old school friends and I've known them for 20 years. I could do without one being in my life but that is hard to admit or do anything about after 20 years without looking like a complete bitch.

I still get on ok with the other so that makes it a bit awkward as they think each other are swell.

Grin and bear but friend 'a' can be a class A bitch and in fact both are pretty selfish and spoilt.

Maybe it's having kids that's made me see these differences??

we are allowed to get curmudgeonly as we get older

Mind you, they sound like boring twats

Oh I do think that kids make you think differently, I am amazed by one friend whose parenting approach is poles apart from mine, I have decided that I liked her before children and so long as neither of us critizes the other then we are fine

If anyone dares to comment on my parenting I will consider their comments and then never speak to them again

You must have thought something of them before, reflect on that, and if it still doesn'twork for you then ditch them!