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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think my friend is a neurotic freak for not going to soft play?

63 replies

Bellebelle · 19/02/2009 15:10

Suggested meet up at a soft play with a close friend and her DS and she's come back saying that she doesn't go to soft play anymore as her DS might get ill from all the germs! AIBU to think that she is being overprotective or is it fair enough? Can't say I've ever noticed that either of my DD's get sick after soft play inparticular and even if they did I'm all for a bit of germ exposure to build a good immune system. It's a pain in the backside for me as my eldest DD (4yo) loves going and its great for me to get her to burn off some energy. It's not warm enough here yet to go to the park and it just gets crazy when I have kids round to our house as it's not all that spacious. Whaddya think?

OP posts:
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 19/02/2009 15:11

What's she going to do when her PFB has to go to school?

sassy · 19/02/2009 15:12

Her reason is a bit though soft play centres tend to be a bit rank (have you ever seen the liquid at the bottom of the ball pits? Yum

But she is v reasonable indeed for not wanting to go to soft play centres, 7th circle of hell imo.

shonaspurtle · 19/02/2009 15:13

Did she have a bad experience like someone having an "accident" in the ball pool?

Germs are everywhere. If her ds isn't immunocompromised in some way then it seems a bit odd.

travellingwilbury · 19/02/2009 15:15

I think she is being a bit nuts but then mine loved it and its good to get them running around and also meeting other children .

Lady Glencora how is the essay going ?

Dropdeadfred · 19/02/2009 15:15

maybe she hates them for another reason but has given the erms one as she thinks you'd laugh at any others
personally i hate\them

BitOfFun · 19/02/2009 15:16

She is perfectly reasonable if germs are just an excuse not to have to sit in those hellholes as an adult...

crokky · 19/02/2009 15:16

She may have got a few nasty bugs from there.

We go to one and in December we got norovirus, followed by a nasty cough/cold/chest infection lasting 2-3 weeks. Since the end of Jan, we have been fighting another cough/cold/chest infection and both times my baby had to have antibiotics. My toddler got through one with antibiotics and one without. Stuff spreads so quickly there and toddlers cough in eachothers faces etc. Both times, a toddler coughed straight into DS's face from a few inches away. DS doesn't even flinch (because he is 2!) but then we have the illness and we can be housebound on antibiotics for quite a while. I am wary of these places, but still do go.

traceybath · 19/02/2009 15:17

God i hate soft play and avoid them like the plague. Also must say DS1 has on a couple of occasions had tummy upset after going to one and no wonder as the loos were utterly vile.

BitOfFun · 19/02/2009 15:17

I mean, what's wrong with a nice tea-party, or going for a tramp in the woods (if he doesn't mind)

dietstartstomorrow · 19/02/2009 15:18

Ridiculous reason. Not going because they are hell would be much more believeable

stealthsquiggle · 19/02/2009 15:23

There are soft play centres and soft play centres.

Some are truly rank and I would agree with sassy's '7th circle of hell' one - but a reasonably clean one (with semi-decent food and acoustics which don't amplify the incredible noise to unbearable levels (not that these are hygiene-related )) is no more likely to give her DS germs than playgroup/park/school.

So I guess whether or not YABU depends on the nature of the soft play place you are suggesting (and possibly how traumatised she is by previous bad experiences)

thedolly · 19/02/2009 15:26

I'm not a neurotic mummy but I was at a soft play area the other day that was incredibly hot (heater on full blast). When they just kept letting more and more children in, it did occur to both DH and I that it was a perfect breeding ground for bugs - no fresh air whatsoever! Instead of coming away feeling energised, all three DC ended up feeling lethargic and I ended up chucking them out letting them play outside in the rain in the afternoon to see if that would invigorate them....it did the trick .

Maybe your friend has had a similar experience?

Guadalupe · 19/02/2009 15:28

Soft play turns me into a neurotic freak. I stay well away.

Original poster
Bellebelle · 19/02/2009 15:30

Hmmmm...sounds as if I have a very good local soft play as it is a really relaxing place! TBH I never go during school hols or once schools are out so maybe that's why. I guess I think that unless you're never going to let your kids socialise they're always going to spread stuff around whether its a soft play, nursery, at someones house etc.

My friend has been a bit paranoid since having her DS though. It's strange, have found that my most relaxed friends are the ones who have become the most uptight since having children.

Crokky - sorry you've all been so ill, Christmas was a wash out for us too and a lot of families we know. The norovirus was rife in my DD's nursery and then we all got the cough/cold thing which both of my dd's seem to have had for about 6 weeks now - misery!

OP posts:
SnowlightMcKenzie · 19/02/2009 15:39

Dolly SO that's why all the ones around here are blardy feezing?

Blackpool tower ball court smells of urine btw. Gross.

pagwatch · 19/02/2009 15:41

I am happy for my children to play anyway - I am def in the 'a bit of dirt is good for you' camp. But farking hell - sofy play! Those places were invented by people who hate parents and want them to die of bad food and sweaty feet smell.

Flightattendant27 · 19/02/2009 15:47

No, she is not a neurotic freak, how very dare you!!!

Sassy's post explains it all - I can't even bear to type it but is that true?

The only time we have been, it was incredibly hot, the people working there were bored teenagers who didn't give a stuff, and I had to actually point out ot them the piece of poo sitting on the floor near the ball thing.

It was only later and thankfully having avoided the ball thing that we noticed a solitary piece of paper floating among the balls, which said do not use this as there has been an accident.

ProfYaffle · 19/02/2009 15:48

Snowlight - maybe, but it's also licensed! Makes a multitude of sins forgiveable!

Flightattendant27 · 19/02/2009 15:48

And once i had pointed it out, very politely, they all looked at me as though I had personally DONE it just to annoy them!

sassy · 19/02/2009 16:10

Flight -

I dropped my purse in the ball pit once - it shot straight to the bottom. the very nice assistant-girl who came to help me find it again explained to me that the balls "sweat" hence the liquid at the bottom. My face

kitbit · 19/02/2009 16:14

oh that's DISGUSTING

herbietea · 19/02/2009 16:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

mugwumpy · 19/02/2009 17:21

i get where shes coming from, i don't live near anyone I know and sometimes I feel endlessly housebound by bug after bug which I usually catch too (you'd think by 31 I'd have some kind of immune system but obviously not!!) and you get this feeling after a while that you never leave the house or have any contact with anyone and it gets bloody depressing. Sometimes you need a break from illnesses to recharge your batteries/regain some bloody sanity... Ps I have a massive gripe with people who don't keep their kids away for the recommended two days after norro has finished and spread it around, you only have temporary immunity to it and it has made my daughter seriously ill a couple of times..

poppy34 · 19/02/2009 17:42

I've some sympathy as I'm struggling with pfb on this... mostly cos I remember being sick for most of the years from 1 -10 with various chest/tummy bugs so know exactly where mugwumpy is coming from. Ok kids are going to get germs etc but seems that there are degrees of disgusting in terms of what you expose em too

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 19/02/2009 17:44

My DD gets a stomach bug EVERY TIME we go to the local soft play, she loves it and so do I but am considering not going again for this reason....YABU