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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be put off reading long threads?

26 replies

MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable · 09/02/2009 17:48

Due to time constraints, I am finding I tend to ignore threads which have 'a lot' of posts, say 100 or more - certainly 200 or more, as I feel I won't be able to read the entire 'story so far' and there is little point as it is very likely someone else will have covered my point anyway.

I suppose what I am really asking is AIBU to feel I have to read all posts? Or is it acceptable just to read the OP and reply to that? Sometimes you can be repetitive if you do this, which I know can be annoying. Or do you find that when you are start a thread, it helps to have a wide selection of views, even if some say the same thing?

I feel I could miss out on some interesting conversations because of my lack of time / energy.

OP posts:
NAB09 · 09/02/2009 17:50

I am drawn to those threads with smaller replies unless it is something I really feel I can help with or are interested in. Sometimes I read all the thread first, others just a few posts and other times just the OP. All depends on the topic.

TrillianAstra · 09/02/2009 17:53

If you weren't allowed to repeat opinions on AIBU every thread would have exactly two replies

I think it's best to try to at least read all the posts by the OP, so you can see the main points of the story so far.

Original poster
MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable · 09/02/2009 18:02

This thread, on the other hand, may prove that threads with 4 posts are just as off-putting

OP posts:
TrillianAstra · 09/02/2009 18:13

It's because people don't want to commit themselves to a position in case it comes back to haunt them.

'Haven't read the whole thread but..'
'Buy you said it was imperative that everyone know all the information before they post, you hypocrite!'

Original poster
MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable · 09/02/2009 18:18

And I worry about being hormonal one day and saying something completely contradictory the next!

OP posts:
believer07 · 09/02/2009 18:33

I don't read long threads that start with...My DP never got me the right pressie for birthday/Xmas/valentines day......

Or Long ones that involve convoluted stories including, the op, her dp, her best friend and the milkman.

Ashantai · 09/02/2009 19:07

I'm afraid i have a short attention span , and will probably just be repeating what everyone else has said so i avoid long threads too.

piscesmoon · 09/02/2009 19:18

I avoid long threads because there is too much to read. If you are on a long thread there is nothing worse than someone who says 'I have only read the opening post'not realising that everyone else has moved on.

LynetteScavo · 09/02/2009 19:20

YANBU - I avoid all threads with more than 20 posts.

I think mumsnetters tend to be like sheep, and either all agree with the first few posters, or tend not to post if they do disagree.

LynetteScavo · 09/02/2009 19:21

By MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable on Mon 09-Feb-09 18:18:08
"And I worry about being hormonal one day and saying something completely contradictory the next!"

I wouldn't worry - I've seen soooo many posters do this.

LynetteScavo · 09/02/2009 19:21

By MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable on Mon 09-Feb-09 18:18:08
"And I worry about being hormonal one day and saying something completely contradictory the next!"

I wouldn't worry - I've seen soooo many posters do this.

pointydog · 09/02/2009 19:37

Just read the4 op and reply to that. I do it all the time. People will just ignore you if you are way behind with chit-chat developments so it doesn't matter at all.

Habbibu · 09/02/2009 19:38

I think just replying to the OP is a PITA, to be honest - the discussion's often taken quite a different turn. I'd skim read - read a few posts as you go, and those by the OP, as someone else has said.

piscesmoon · 09/02/2009 19:43

The worst thing is when they have a real go at the OP, not knowing that she apologised and changed her mind 40 messages before.

pointydog · 09/02/2009 19:45

What does it matter though?

Post whatever you like.

Original poster
MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable · 10/02/2009 09:29

I have noticed there is a loose pattern to AIBU threads: OP; series of posts agreeeing; a tentative disagreement; violent disagreement spurred on by previous tentative disagreement; a few more moderate disagreements; OP comes back to clarify the point; violent disagreer attacks OP for posting on AIBU if they didn't want opinions; fair minded posts disagreeing with nastiness; a few more reasonable posts on both sides and from then on it it just repeats itself really... occasionally with a 'side issue' cropping up and the whole cycle starting again.

OP posts:
LucyEllensmummy · 10/02/2009 09:46

Good post ms bean

harpomarx · 10/02/2009 09:54

Mrs SB - I thought you said you ignored those threads? Sounds like you have made a (very accurate) study of them!

Original poster
MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable · 10/02/2009 10:03

I am increasingly ignoring the very long threads Harpo, but have participated on a few 'from the start' as it were (even started a couple , and it is interesting to note the pack mentatlity!

OP posts:
LucyEllensmummy · 10/02/2009 10:07

I tend to ignore the longer threads because what i want to say has probably been said twenty times already.

Original poster
MrsSeanBeanIsEmployable · 10/02/2009 10:10

Yeah, I also find that LucyEllensMummy; but strangely, if you do join the discussion and repeat what several people have already said, sod's law dictates that it will be you who gets any grief!

OP posts:
HeadFairy · 10/02/2009 10:12

I'm sorry I don't have time to read all this thread

But YANBU IMO, I never have time to read those huge ones. Do feel I'm missing out sometimes, esp the more entertaining bum sex ones!

TsarChasm · 10/02/2009 10:18

Well I haven't read the whole thread..

I don't plough through enormous threads either, life's too short but heaven help you if you say something that's already been covered.

'Have you not even bothered to read the thread?!' is often the stinging rebuke. It's hardly crime of the century though is it?

But then again I don't post much on enormous heavy going serious threads where people are getting heated up. It makes my head hurt.

TigersEnglandChick · 10/02/2009 10:20

I don't tend to open threads that are into triple figures either.
If I do then I read the OP and the first few posts; normally I spot someone saying what I would have said, so I close the thread a move on.
I don't like to get involved in heated debates - that's not what I'm here for - so I tend to avoid anything that's got a bit 'nasty' too.

mrsruffallo · 10/02/2009 10:24

I have been severelt reprimanded for not reading a whole thread before I posted recently.
TBH I skim the really long ones as I don't have as much MN time these days.
As someone else posted, it's hardly a crime is it?