To have politely said "No just enjoy yourself" when i wanted to scream "Come home right now"

[AmIWhatAndWhy]

DP arranged to go to the cinema this afternoon wih a friend, then for a drink after. He left at noon and is still out in a pub. I have a beef roast sitting in the fridge as it's wasteful to cook it just for me but I'm starving and we have nothing else in. He just phoned to tell me they'd had a chinese meal and were going out for more drinks. We had planned to eat together . I don't even have money to order in.

I don't want to be a nag. I don't want to stop DP having nice times out with friends. He does it so rarely that I can't grumble.

But today is a different matter. I'm ill, DD is ill. DS broke the stairgate to their room so I have nowhere safe to put them to go to the loo or eat food in peace. They have both been intentionally naughty all day. Asking for drinks then pouring them all over the floor etc.

The house is a real mess and I normally use weekends to get on top of things as it's easier when DP is here to play with the DC.

The DC are wide awake and I feel like I could just walk out right now.

I think you will probably be having a lie in in the morning?

I am sure dp will want to get up with the kids and bring you breakfast in bed at about ten o'clock.

(if he isn't quite so sure about doing this, you may have to make it quite clear that it is absolutely compulsory)

Sorry to hear you're having a shit night. Will your DH pehaps offe to look after the kids tomorrow to make up for it, and you can have some time to yourself?

take a deep breath have something to eat toast cereal or something take dc's upstairs with you and all snuggle up in your bed. Also plan somethiuing nice for you even if you never do it planning it will make you feel better

Don't know what happened to the 2 missing 'r's in my last post!

I think you definately deserve a lie in tomorrow and if your DP is nearly as reasonable and kind as you obviously are with your reaction, he will pull his weight tomorrow and appreciate hoe lucky he has been.

You could cut a bit off the joint and cook it as a steak have a lovely steak sandwich?

Just I know i get really down when I am hungry, and would be expecially upset if I thought I'd been done out of a delicious roast dinner.

Then go to bed and have a nice snuggle under the duvet and enjoy spreading out and wriggling around like you can when OH isn't there.

He's just rung and said they are going out clubbing. He's with a terribly interesting group apparantly, art phd students, journalists. Great for him.

I feel terrible I just yelled at DS as he was wrestling DD, and he looked sad, then switched to a nasty face and intentionally swiped all the coats off the hooks in the hall. I'm obviously affecting how they are acting because of my own foul mood.

I'm failing today. I really am.

There will be no lie in for me, I never get one. I will however be going out shopping and for a coffee with the papers, no matter how bad his hangover.

Thanyou, you give wise advice.

I might just do a steak sandwich. I've got part baked ciabbatas red onions and some yummy mustard my mum made. why didn't I think of that?

I think next time you have to tell him you would like him to come home, as the matyr thing gets you nowhere and is a whole nose/face thing.

I know i have done it.

Please have something to eat you will feel better for it.

I'm going to go lie down with the DC for a bit and hope they stay in bed after.

because youre not as greedy as me!

You sound like you;ve perked up already, enjoy your supper

If it was my DH I'd have to say " I know you're having a lovely time, cinema, drinks, meal out, drinks. But please come home now. Clubbing is one step too far"
Have you told him the children have been little shits troublesome?

Nothing worse than being a misery when someone is out having a good time.Leave him be and let him enjoy it.

You can plan your own outing then.
Also, why can't you have a lie-in?