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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To REALLY want a cigarette...

22 replies

cupofteaplease · 31/01/2009 21:22

I have given up smoking. I no longer crave cigarettes, ever... ahem.

But dh has gone out for an evening on the lash, issuing various ultimatums, after a councilling session this morning.

And actually, I really feel like I NEED a cigarette right now. I have smoked for 12 years. Given up for a year each time when pregnant. Have been smoke free for 5 months now- just because I want to do this for the girls. But right now I am craving.

But I have no cigarettes here. And no way of gettin any. But Dh is out right now with a great big 20 pack of them. I could actually mug him for them right now.

AIBU?

OP posts:

FiveGoMadInDorset · 31/01/2009 21:24

Yes you are for wanting one but no you are not for craving. It is a passing phase and you are doing really well, I have stopped for 1 year and 3 months and still crave occasionally, have a drink of water, chew on a carrot.

Original poster

cupofteaplease · 31/01/2009 21:25

By the way, to anyone who has never smoked- Yes, this is how all-consuming it is. After 5 months, I still crave a cigarette. As in, I would leave my house an sneak one out, kind of craving. If it wasn't for my dds' tucked up in bed. This is addiction at its most shameful

OP posts:

ManIFeelLikeAWoman · 31/01/2009 21:31

Remember that you stopped because smoking is not a hobby and not take it or leave it.

If you have one you will have two and you will soon be back where you left off - or worse.

Take it from one who knows - and who has come out on the other side (smoke free for five years now after a 40-a-day addiction - whoopee!)

FiveGoMadInDorset · 31/01/2009 21:32

I agree with all consuming, I tried many times to stop and it was finally hypnotherapy that did the trick.

TheFirstLiffey · 31/01/2009 21:33

I saw on tv recently that inhaling really deeply with one finger over one nostril helps alleviate the craving. do that five times.

kormachameleon · 31/01/2009 21:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sorrento · 31/01/2009 21:37

I got very drunk last night and had half a ciggie, had the headache from hell this morning which I know is mainly from the ciggarette and a huge spot on my lip which hurts (again from the shitty chemicals in the fag).
Don't do it !!!!

Remotew · 31/01/2009 21:38

Unfortunately there is no such thing as just one cigarette. As I know everytime I fail to stay cig free.

Ride it out for tonight. The craving will pass.

BopTheAlien · 31/01/2009 21:39

You're doing really well, and I hope you can resist the urge... IME it takes a long time for the cravings to really go, I had to just accept them and live with them before I finally kicked the habit. I must have stopped and started again a couple of dozen times at least because after a few months I'd get those cravings and "just have one" - which always led to another and another and another. This year it'll be 10 years since I finally quit, and although the cravings carried on for quite a while, they did go eventually! So - good luck.....

SSSsssssquonk · 31/01/2009 21:41

cravings only last for two minutes.

Really, they really do.

You can manage two minutes, can't you?

And in a while when you get another one, it's only two minutes. You can handle two minutes. You can

Think how smug you can be in the morning when you got through this, as opposed to how disgusted with yourself you will feel if you give in to the temptation.

You can do this.

kidcreoleandthecoconuts · 31/01/2009 21:49

Dont give in!

Remind yourself of all the reasons why you gave up, that's what I do. I gave up 18 months ago. I sill crave occasionally but it passes very quickly.
If you did give in and have one the fag would taste absolutely awful after all this time anyway.

Original poster

cupofteaplease · 31/01/2009 21:55

But I REALLY want one. My fingers are dancing and I'm squirming...I've thought, 'could I pop to the shop?, The girls are fast asleep'... and then I've slapped myself because of course I'd never put them in that danger but this adiction is calling me and I'm crumbling...

I wish I'd never picked up a stupid, disgusting fag. My darling dad was a heavy smoker and last year dropped down dead of a heart attack at 55 years old.

I am a primary school teacher and a mother, (and a little bit sloshed), and want better for all my children than a smelly, disease-ridden loser. But, I'd give it all up right now for one measley drag...

OP posts:

kormachameleon · 31/01/2009 21:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kidcreoleandthecoconuts · 31/01/2009 22:00

Drink a glass of cold water
Have some chocolate

If all else fails.....go to bed!!

Just dont light up!!!!

tumtumtetum · 31/01/2009 22:03

Put some lively music on and have a dance. Seriously.

Eat some cheese.

Do you have allen carr? Read allen carr...

Original poster

cupofteaplease · 31/01/2009 22:06

Thanks guys!! But I don't want to go to bed. I want to ENJOY a glass of wine, listening to some sobering music, without a dirty fag in my hand

I HAVE to get through this addiction. I challenge anyone to say giving up smoking is easy. Because it is not. It is taking all the will power I have within me. Rar!!

OP posts:

fryalot · 31/01/2009 22:08

If you have a cigarette now, the last five months of hell will all have been for nothing

or has it been so easy that you want to go through it again?

deep breaths, rub the inside of your wrist, have a biscuit or some chewing gum, sit in the kids' bedroom (you would never smoke in there, would you?)

You can get through this

Original poster

cupofteaplease · 31/01/2009 22:14

Squonk-what a genius!! I woukd NEVER light up in the girls' bedroom! Go and sit in there...breathe in their gorgeous, innocent, talcomy scent. Because I'd never tarnish that...
They are so precious. And I am weak and grieving. But I will not let the dirty disease that killed my father, kill me too...no way. I am stronger than Malboro would have me believe!!x

OP posts:

Original poster

cupofteaplease · 31/01/2009 22:16

I am surprised at the lack of responses... how did YOU give up smoking? It can't have been easy? Tips, please?!

OP posts:

tumtumtetum · 31/01/2009 22:18

Zyban.

Was brilliant.

Took two goes on it but, wow.

fryalot · 31/01/2009 22:19

I went to an NHS smoking cessation course. Breathing into the carbon monoxide reader thingy was a real eye-opener!

I gave up for two years then I got in to the habit of having the odd one when I went out for a drink (about once or twice a year, we're not talking every week or anything...) but it got out of hand so I gave up again.

Had some awful news over christmas so had a bit of a smoking setback then, but am currently fag-free again.

I just need to get my head round the fact that being a smoker is like being an alcoholic, I will always be a smoker; just hopefully I will be a smoker who doesn't smoke.

YOu are stronger than this, I promise. 5 months is a HUGE commitment to something. You would be daft to turn your back on all your hard work.

Olifin · 02/02/2009 10:04

How did you get on cupof?

Hope you managed to avoid the lure of the weed.

Like you I gave up for a year for each of my pregnancies and then started again. Have just stopped again (4 weeks today). It feels a bit different this time because I am choosing to stop. WHen I was pregnant, it was more of an obligation.

LIke os many others have said, I just keep reminding myself that 'just one' will lead me back to a full-time addiction and that there's no such thing as being a social smoker; not for me anyway, some people seem able to manage it.

In stressful situations, it is natural for your mind to turn to cigarettes but bear in mind that, rather than relieving stress, smoking creates more stress by setting up a physical addiction that you have to indulge every few hours.

It also helps me to remember how hard it was to make the initial step in deciding to stop. I think it's much easier to remain stopped rather than having to go through that initial stopping again.

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