Friendship

[Cookiemg]

I am 7.5 months pregnant. I have worked part time throughout most of my pregnancy as I had a miscarriage and am now not working at all but am living on MA. I have circles of friends of various closeness and I feel as though I am always the one chasing them to catch up to do something. They all work full time and have partners and families. Am I being unreasonable to expect them to pursue me for a coffee or the pics rather than the other way around. Is is possible that they have got used to me being the instigater and take it for granted that I will always be the organiser.
OR Do I have too much time on my hands to dwell on this and they are just getting on with their busy lives, whereas I would love to be half as busy as them?

Many thanks

cookiemag i am not going to say reasonable or unreasonable as being pregnant allows you to be both with no judgement! But as someone (pre DD) remembered everyone's birhtdays, emailed regulalry, went out with friends etc, I am now grovelling to most people for forgetting birthdays, not responding to emails, being too tired to see them etc! I forgot to go to someones 40th the other day!!! I guess when you work (I do part-time) and are busy with a child or children you do have less time - this is not to say you dont appreciate seeing someone, and often when i make the time to see someone i go and enjoy it, i jsut find time passing me and dont instigate as much i used to, not because i dont want to, but because i just dont have the time ...
so enjoy this time of relative peace, read books, tidy, do all the little jobs you want to do, phone your friends see them, and earn massive brownie points, because soon you will be phoning to say sorry i havnt called for a month i seem to have been busy (busy of course means changing nappies, and general motherhood!!!
I am sure your friends apprecaite you organising things ... your payback for all this coming!!!

i think as long as they want to meet when you offer than all is well we have different level of need being at home being pregnant others who are working are tired and life still is hectic for them and maybe are leaving you to rest not wanting to bother you etc are they still in contact via phone or e mail as all my friends but one stopped all contact with me let me down when we arranged meet yups and in the end dropped me altogether there is nothing wrong with being the organizer im like that now and im not pregnant

as i know how lazy i can feel sometimes and if i have someone offering me to go out then thats great other wise id more than likely go home and drop onto the couch and stay there dont take it personally it can feel like a lonely time when everyone else's life is still busy around you take some time to relax and enjoy the peace but i wouldn't say anyone is being unreasonable as unfortunately even after child its normally one person pushing someone to go out as you are then so wrapped up in childcare and dont spend enough time with friends

I'm with you on that Kruger. Time just seems to go by. I'm full of good intentions but I do find that birthday cards, thank yous, friendly phone calls and arrangements for meet ups do sometimes slip by without being actioned. I do try, but sometimes I slip up. I do think about my friends, but sadly that is as far as it gets quite often.