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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I still can't believe I'm pregnant and nothing seems to be going wrong

44 replies

duchesse · 24/01/2009 11:05

I'm practically 12 weeks, and still no bleeding, no cramps, only a very little nausea and tiredness. I feel better than I do with PMT... It has taken 5.5 years, a mmc at 13 weeks and quite a few chemical/ very early miscarriages to get here. When is it all going to go wrong?

12 week scan on Thursday. Am very scared they'll find no heartbeat.

OP posts:

thatsnotmymonster · 29/01/2009 15:14

great news!

vERY happy for you!

mumoverseas · 29/01/2009 15:35

fantastic news Duchesse, please try not to worry about the size of the little one.
I had a mc 3 years ago and when pregnant again a few months later was so worried about it that I had an early scan to reassure me. I was told that baby smaller than dates which really worried me and had to go back the next week when I was again told small for dates and bled for a while at 7 weeks. I spent months worrying but that little small for dates baby is now a healthy litte 2 year old. Am pregnant again and again at the start had problems (bleeding and small for dates) but am now 36 weeks and I think I'm carrying a small elephant.
I will keep my fingers crossed for you. xx

Original poster

duchesse · 29/01/2009 18:32

I can't actually remember for sure when my lmp was, but was pretty certain it was the week of the 2nd of November; but if I tend ovulate late in the cycle, it would certainly explain why it's taken so long to get pregnant...

OP posts:

CoteDAzur · 29/01/2009 18:37

Congratulations

Don't worry about the dates. I'm 23 weeks pregnant and ultrasound specialist dated this baby as having been conceived on 22nd date of cycle.

I don't think so, but hey, I don't really care. Maybe I did ovulate a week late, who knows?

Northernlurker · 29/01/2009 18:40

That's great news. Seeing the baby moving and heartbeating is great and a small nuchal fold is also an excellent sign that everything is as it should be. The dates can be explained by erratic ovulation - and as you've said that might explain other things too. Really pleased you've leapt this hurdle - wishing you well as you carry on.

ScummyMummy · 29/01/2009 19:19

So far so good duchesse. Active baby with small nuchal fold sounds great. Wouldn't the sonographer have said if there were any concerns with the heartrate?

cluelessnchaos · 29/01/2009 19:22

Wonderful news, dont worry about the dates, mine were always different from teh ones the scanner gave me.

Original poster

duchesse · 30/01/2009 12:45

Thanks all

Clueless, which dates turned out to be more accurate? Yours or the scan dates?

OP posts:

youknownothingofthecrunch · 30/01/2009 13:03

this is the link to the thread daisy mentioned

You're very welcome to join us. It's nice to have somewhere to come and talk about your fears and sadnesses, without being judged for not being just "happy".

Original poster

duchesse · 30/01/2009 13:07

Thanks crunch- I may when I'm feeling braver and more secure about this pregnancy. I'm in quite a strange place psychologically at the moment. On the one hand, everything seems to be going well, but on the other hand, there's...well, everything else. I am fighting a bit shy of the August antenatal thread, as I can remember all too well how cruel it is to fall and be trampled by those going on without you.

OP posts:

youknownothingofthecrunch · 30/01/2009 13:12

I know the feeling. I joined the preg after MC thread at around 17 weeks because I didn't want to jinx it. I still haven't joined a "normal" antenatal thread (at 28 weeks) because I can't quite believe that at the end of this there is going to be a baby. I was the same with ds2 - wouldn't believe fully it until the second he was in my arms. And it's hard because everyone says "Oh you must be thrilled" and you are, but the happier you get the further there is to fall. Does that make any sense?

Original poster

duchesse · 30/01/2009 13:13

Complete sense. That's why my pervading feeling is of detached cynicism, and likely to remain like that until the birth. It nearly slipped a little yesterday though during the scan when I saw (and felt) the little blighter kicking away in there.

OP posts:

youknownothingofthecrunch · 30/01/2009 13:26

That's good. Scans can be very reassuring.

When you feel ready, come and join us. Or do some lurking until you want to dive in. It's very supportive and there's always someone about to answer any worries or just to understand. It's nice when there are other people with the same sort of due date feeling the same things as you at the same time.

Hope to see you soon.

ahfeckit · 30/01/2009 13:42

congrats on the pregnancy i am also a cynic and feel that way about my pregnancy, so you are not alone!! with my first, i wasn't 100% convinced my baby was fine until he was born into my arms. even though test results and scans showed otherwise.... there will always be people like us around!!

DDraigoch33 · 30/01/2009 13:48

Congratulations and good luck hun

georgimama · 30/01/2009 13:56

Duchesse, what you're feeling is completely normal. I spent Christmas day at 30 weeks pregnant in tears because I was convinced things were going to go wrong. I assembled the moses basket stand at 39 weeks and then sat there looking at it thinking "but my baby will never actually get to sleep in it." I was demented with anxiety.

My mum was convinced I was going to be a mad, hyper-anxious mother once DS was born but I'm not. The moment I had him in my arms I was fine, and not before.

herbaceous · 30/01/2009 15:34

Duchesse - I'm at 19 weeks, and feel just the same. I've got my 20-week scan next week, and don't believe it's going to be OK. Even though I saw him/her grooving on an impromptu scan two weeks ago.

I want to buy some more maternity clothes, start scrounging baby kit, etc, but constantly feel I'm tempting fate.

But then I too am a multiple miscarrier - four in three years, with two MMCs - so I must be hard-wired not to accept that it could possibly be OK

Original poster

duchesse · 31/01/2009 23:45

herbie I didn't know you were pregnant! Ready is too, and somebody else from the hut but I can't remember who. Congratulations!

I got all the scan pics out from the other children this evening and compared them, and I think I'm starting to feel a little positive about this. Weird turnabout, really.

OP posts:

cluelessnchaos · 01/02/2009 17:20

sorry i went to edinburgh for a grown up weekend, was lovely. The scan dates were more accurate but only because they tended to go so overdue. I knew exactly when I had conceived cos dh was working away a lot.

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