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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be shocked that my friend let her 4yr old daughter watch

24 replies

BettyTurnip · 14/01/2009 19:41

the Sex and the City movie, (and has watched it three times), along with her 11 year old sister?

I know people might say "What's it to you what they watch?" but I have a 4yr old dd too and I think Sex and the City is completely inappropriate for an 11yr old, never mind a 4yr old.

Maybe I'm uptight, but my face was literally when my friend mentioned it this morning.

OP posts:

noonki · 14/01/2009 19:48

most of the references to sex will go completely over her head.

i wouldn't let mine though (think they would be bored more than anything)

compo · 14/01/2009 19:50

some people just seem desperate to get their children to grow up

Original poster

BettyTurnip · 14/01/2009 19:51

Oh God, it would inspire endless sex related questions from mine!

It just seems a shame to 'spoil' their innocence (I know that sounds sentimental but YKWIM) at such a young age.

OP posts:

loler · 14/01/2009 19:55

Don't think my dd would be interested - not enough guns and violence

RubyRioja · 14/01/2009 19:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

BettyTurnip · 14/01/2009 19:59

Ah well, at least friend's dds will know how to shag properly when the time comes .

OP posts:

quint · 14/01/2009 20:00

My both DD's would be utterly bored by it. And when I was 11 there's no way I would have wanted to watch SATC with my poarents - how embarrasing!

LiffeyKidman · 14/01/2009 20:01

Mad!!!

LightShinesInTheDarkness · 14/01/2009 20:04

Omigod! There is that very full on sex scene! Not for a 4 or 11-yr old, despite the gorgeous dressses.

frogs · 14/01/2009 20:04

I'd be more shocked about someone letting an 11yo watch it, tbh. Most of it would go right over the head of a 4yo, assuming they'd actually sit through it at all rather than wandering off to find something more interesting to do. But an 11yo is presumably soaking it all up and internalising some of the values, which is not a good thing at all.

But it is hard if you have big age gaps -- my youngest dd had certainly seen all the Harry Potter films and eg. Stormbreaker at a much younger age than I would ideally have liked.

mumeeee · 14/01/2009 22:57

Sex in the city is not even appopiate for 11 year old.

LynetteScavo · 14/01/2009 22:59

What rating does it have?

pooka · 14/01/2009 23:01

When dd was about 8 weeks old and was awake all evening feeding/complaining of colic she was most taken with SATC. I think it was all the close-ups of women's faces. That and the news.

But no, I wouldn't have let her watch it once she was older and asleep in evenings.

KingCanuteIAm · 14/01/2009 23:02

I agree that an 11yo is more likely to be disturbed by it than a 4yo.

A 4yo will have no clue what is going on and very little interest in what is going on, whereas most 11yo will know enough to be very uncomfortable IMO!

LS, it is a 15 I think.

Original poster

BettyTurnip · 14/01/2009 23:17

I've just been reading another thread where the OP's son has been involved in some "abusive" play with a little girl and loads of posters are commenting that this girl has obviously been abused to be demonstrating behaviour like this.

God knows what sort of words, phrases, physical moves etc (Miranda bouncing up and down on Steve anyone?!) friend's 4yr old is picking up, and how odd it might seem if someone witnessed her re-enacting them.

(Btw, they both love the film apparently: the 4yr old told her Mum that her sister is Samantha and she's Carrie).

I'm just relieved that my dd is happy with Beebies.

OP posts:

KingCanuteIAm · 15/01/2009 10:31

I have read that thread too, none of it sounds like behaviour that could have been picked up from watching a film. The finger thing is nowhere in the film and is not something that a 4yo would think of by themselves.

If you are that worried go to SS, but really, watching a movie like this once is not going to poisen a child the way the poor kid in the other thread has been.

Please do not compare real abuse with watching an inappropriate movie, it is insulting to those who have actually suffered the kind of abuse discussed in the other thread.

Nekabu · 15/01/2009 10:46

There is one extremely full on sex scene and several others that are almost as explicit!

KingCanuteIAm · 15/01/2009 10:58

That does still not equate to extreme child abuse.

BTW, it is not in the least extreme when compared to the series. The sex is not actually shown but more implied. Only someeone who knew what sex was would be able to recognise it. Most 4yo would play games of sitting on someones tummy playing horses or airoplanes. It is your understnading of it that makes you see sex. A young child would not (should not) have anythng like the same understanding as you do.

Like I siad, more worrying for the 11yo and not in any way comparable to the other thread.

Nekabu · 15/01/2009 12:06

I don't think it's child abuse either! I haven't seen the other thread that's being mentioned so can't comment on that. I just think it's inappropriate viewing for an 11 year old. I don't think the 4 year old would really know what was going on but the sex scene at the end, was pretty explicit and if the series showed similar then I don't think that would be suitable for an 11 year old either!

NAB3lovelychildren · 15/01/2009 12:07

I know someone who lets their 6 year old watch Little Britain but then they also allow older aged clothes, make up , etc etc.

Bubbaluv · 15/01/2009 12:12

They will grow up thinking all men have penises like Dante and be very dissapointed with life's realities.

Bubbaluv · 15/01/2009 12:15

KingCanute, As I remember it, there is a naked woman on her back on a table with her legs wrapped around a naked man (mmmm Dante) and he is vigorously thrusting away.
No diagrams are shown, but it's about as explicit as you get outside porn.
Not something I would want my 11yo watching!

KingCanuteIAm · 15/01/2009 12:17

I agree no for an 11yo.

I have forgotten that bit though...

Looks like I will have to watch it again for research purposes

MrsArchieTheInventor · 15/01/2009 12:29

It's a 15 rated film for a reason. I'm no prude but I would certainly feel uncomfortable watching it with a 4 year old child. A four year old is picking up words and mannerisms that you don't even realise, and it's a while since I watched it but I'm sure there are more than a couple of 'fucks' and even a 'cunt' or two, not to mention the sex scenes and the scene where Samantha turns herself into a sushi board. Too many questions to answer and too much for a child of 4 to be taking in.

Sorry to be judgemental here but it smacks to me of a mother who is either so 'right on' and hippified that she feels it apropriate to be discussing masturbation and anal sex with children who should be playing with Angelina Ballerina or she just plainly doesn't give a damn what her children watch.

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