It's starting to wind me up (irrationally) and if I said anything to DH he would get annoyed.
His dads brother (DHs uncle)has terminal cancer, he has had it for almost a year and has, over the past month gone very rapidly downhill. He is the only brother FIL has left. FIL was the youngest, by 12 years of 5. The brother that is left is 74.
Anyway, every day, sometimes twice, since the middle of december DH ahs been getting phone messages left on his mobile
Along the lines of "hello son, its dad,can you ring me/call me immdeiately/its urgent/I've had terrible news**delete where appropriate, all said in this very slow, grief stricken sounding voice.
We got one at 10.30 pm on Christmas Eve. last night, we got another at 11.30
It was the same old thing "your uncle x isn't good, we've been to visit him again" and DH gets all the same conversation as yesterday, and the day before that and the day before that.
Reading this back I know I sound like a heartless cow, and I admit I probably ABU. But I just don't see what the ILs expect us to do. We live a 7/8 hour drive away from them. DH hasn't seen his uncle since our wedding 15 years ago. He never gets a Christmas card, birthday card etc off them.
I just think that(well I don't think, I know) that FIL loves doing grief and sadness. he is never happier than when he is A) Bragging or B) Being a martyr
I know that when his poor uncle does pass away, they will expect DH to go to the funeral. he was "press-ganged into going to Step MILs mums funeral,, in November, it cost us over £100 in petrol, plus another £150 on nights out - with poor upset FIL, who had DH in the pub the night before the funeral, the night of the funeral (and step MIL was left at home on her own,after burying her mother with instructions not to drink so she could go and collect them) and then again on the ngiht after
If I tell DH though how I feel about this, then he will call me a selfish bitch, I know he would, and I don't blame him, hence I'm doing it here.