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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be peed off with my brother?

4 replies

smittenkitten · 05/01/2009 20:04

OK, here's the background. My brother and his wife has their DS2 in October. He was a difficult baby and for 7 or 8 weeks he had day and night the wrong way round, which was obviously very tiring, but he sleeps through now. their first DS also slept through from about 9 weeks, whereas my DS didn't sleep through until he was about 20 months and we got bugger all sympathy and understanding from them!

every jan my brother organises a weekend away for various friends and family, which he wrote out about for jan 2009, but nobody wanted to go this time. it is always a different place, so it's not familiar. I suggested that since nobody wanted to go away, they should come to us. We are further away than they would normally go for the Jan get away, but not massively.

Now he's going, "erm, don't know, only just got baby in a routine" etc.

So he was happy to go away to an unknown place with unknown facilities etc, but now I suggest they get their arses up here (we go down south 6-8 times a year as parents are there too), it's all terribly difficult.

so, MN jury, AIBU?

OP posts:
pamelat · 05/01/2009 21:05

Not unreasonable but sounds a bit strange.

Why might they not want to come to yours? What is different about where they would normally book and your place?

It is a little odd.

smittenkitten · 05/01/2009 21:19

I have no idea why a weekend away in a rented cottage with both kids in their room would be acceptable, but a stay in our house with plenty of space is difficult

OP posts:
MrsMerryHenry · 05/01/2009 21:22

From what you've said he sounds a little self-absorbed. Is this a fair assessment? Also (and this is in no way an excuse) sometimes men can be a bit crap with the old empathy. And for that they deserve a hefty whack round the ears.

sunnygirl1412 · 05/01/2009 21:36

If they come to the OP's house, they are guests and might worry that it would be difficult/antisocial to maintain their baby's routine, whereas in a rental house no-one is on their 'home turf' so they might feel it would be easier there.

That said, I can understand why you feel hurt by this, smittenkitten - MrsMerryHenry is right about men and empathy - my dh is equally lacking in social skils, tbh, and my dbil equally deserving of a clump round the ears.

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