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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think people should make more of an effort?????

24 replies

theboob · 04/01/2009 00:09

its my birthday and i have had a night out planned for months the same thing happens every year where most people drop out ,i know its a shit time of year but its the same every year and i make the effort for their birthdays all year round

ok winge over
and im still going out with my hardcore friends

OP posts:
Deemented · 04/01/2009 00:11

Yes - you're still going out - what's the problem? If you know it happens every year then why worry about it?

thumbwitch · 04/01/2009 00:13

no YANBU - THEY know your birthday is the same time of year every year as well so they should be able to make an informed decision at the planning stage.

Why don't you have an "official" birthday a few weeks later? Or in June, when the weather should be nicer?

cornsilk · 04/01/2009 00:13

aw happy birthday-is everyone skint?

Original poster
theboob · 04/01/2009 00:13

i ment same day every year as in a year to prepare for it!

OP posts:
thumbwitch · 04/01/2009 00:13
  • Happy Birthday btw!
Original poster
theboob · 04/01/2009 00:15

just a really crappy time of year for it,most people are skint yes just would be nice for a get together like someone who's birthday is in may

OP posts:
mazzystartled · 04/01/2009 00:15

happy birthday

it must be disappointing

maybe change the type of celebrating next year - have a daytime party or lunch and go out with dp at night

leoleosuperstar · 04/01/2009 00:16

I agree only 365 days notice! Not like it just happens on random days every year.

Happy Birthday.

Original poster
theboob · 04/01/2009 00:16

thankyou

OP posts:
Original poster
theboob · 04/01/2009 00:19

DH and DC'S always make a huge fuss and DH is coming out too for a few hours any way,i just hate my birthday

but it could have been worse i was due on xmas day

OP posts:
stitch · 04/01/2009 00:19

happy birthday
personally, i wouldnt bother making an effort for people who wont make an effort for you.
also, if it is a difficult time of year, why dont you do it a couple of weekends later, so it is in the middle of january, rather than the beginning.

Original poster
theboob · 04/01/2009 00:25

yes i could do that

might just send the invites out now for my 30th,which will be before xmas as it is joint with DH

OP posts:
naturalbornmum · 04/01/2009 01:20

Happy Birthday - although YABU - it is a bad time of year and people have other priorities whatever the time of year.

teafortwo · 04/01/2009 01:40

Oh no - poor you! It is nothing to do with you, your family or your friends. It is the time of year one hundred percent!!!!

It is my Mums birthday too and it hurts us all every year to celebrate with bleary eyes, short tempers and full tummies from Chrissy and NYE.

Tonight she wanted to organise a poshy dinner to enjoy with my Dad and she nearly started crying in Tescos and just left the trolley in the isle because they didn't have any of the ingredients she needed because of selling out for NYE!!!!

She loves baking and takes Nigella stylie cakes into work and they get thrown in the bin because everyone is on a diet!

mmm... I like the idea of changing the type of celebration... what about a spa style thing (doesn't need to be expensive my town leisure centre cost under 4 pounds entrance and is quite nice. Or you could do it at home?)- I am getting into this idea - recover from chrissy and celebrate at the same time? I might write that down somewhere so I remember to organise it for my Mum next year!

Happy Birthday x x x

teafortwo · 04/01/2009 01:45

ps - My Mum, after much deep hurt, has learnt to take a mixture of normal and exotic fruit into work for her birthday - if you have a culture of cakes for birthdays in your job I would recommend it she said it goes down an absolute storm!!!

rolereversal · 04/01/2009 02:34

yanbu!! you cant help when you were born and your friends should make the bloody effort!!

we got married on 28th of dec and no one ever remembers our anniversary and most of the time we cant be bothered to celebrate, but thats our own fault I guess!!

I would make the effort to come out on your birthday if I knew you

Gettinthehangofthisatlast · 04/01/2009 02:49

Happy Birthday!

No, your friends are not being fair
You make the effort for them, but somehow it's all forgotten 'cause they've had enough fun for one month?

My birthday is start of Feb and it's the same, believe it or not - after Christmas (and some people getting paid early), January is always the longest month to get through so people always say they can't afford to go out (I try to think they're not trying to tell me something...).

I do the same as teafortwo's Mum with the fruit thing - fed up of my home baked offerings going to waste...

Original poster
theboob · 04/01/2009 06:54

thankyou all

have been up all night with the runs
thought i would pass out from the pain of stomach cramps,DS2 has been up with me so i'm wondering if its a bug

happy birthday to me lol

OP posts:
stoppinattwo · 04/01/2009 07:06

Happy birthday theboob XXXXXXXX

Original poster
theboob · 04/01/2009 07:15

thankyou xxx

OP posts:
Simplysally · 04/01/2009 07:27

YANBU - my Nan's birthday was January 1st and we always made an effort to make her birthday hers as well as NYD. You're only born on one day and that isn't one you can choose!

I'd go with a non-Birthday day out though if it is a recurrent problem.

chickydee · 04/01/2009 10:39

Hi, It was my birthday new years day so I feel your pain!! I know exactly what its like, nobody EVER wants to go out for my birthday, always skint and hungover and it IS a crap time of yr to have a birthday sooooooooo.......I have decided that next yr, (my 40th) will be the last new yrs day birthday for me, gonna have it in june from now on lol.
I know how dissapointing it is when no body seems remotely interested.
My DH sort of makes an effort.,(you may have seen my thread), and my freinds are great and the kids spoil me,but its stil new years day before anything else iyswim?
Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, and have a hug...cos I so know where your coming from
xx
ps.my birthday night out is 17th jan , only 3 weeks late!

MegSophandEmma · 04/01/2009 10:50

Happy birthday Boobin xx

gagamama · 04/01/2009 12:00

Ooh I have 3 friends and 2 family members' birthdays between 20th December and 10th January (and soon to be one more as DD is now 10 days overdue!) and I don't physically have the time, let alone the money, to celebrate everything. In the past my family members (dad and brother) have have a huge party on NYE which is aid of their birthday as well as New Year, and that goes down a storm. It's just one of those things, really. August birthdays aren't much better as everyone is on holiday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, though!

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