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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be wondering why my local toyshop was heaving today with parents buying piles of toys with their dc/

32 replies

MilaMae · 29/12/2008 20:36

To be frank it was revolting.

I had to buy a cheap doll to stick in dd's bday cake,foolishly thought the place would be empty.

It wasn't -there were parents saying"pick what you like it's all on sale" parents saying "you've got the other 3(scarey toddler size doll)we'll get the boy one too he's half price". There were kids screaming because they wanted more,a 6 year old(ish)girl in front of me with an envelope containing £50 whining because she wanted to go back and spend the last £5.

Now I know some kids get money for Christmas but do they have to spend it now,did they not have enough? I also know some dc have bdays in Dec(my dd included)these were not parents buying last minute presents.

It really was horrible,it was feverish buying for the sake of it. I just don't understand it.

OP posts:
pippylongstockings · 29/12/2008 20:47

I can imagine it was horrible - but I will be there tomorrow, as both my kids got money for christmas and at 2 and 4 years old they do not understand delayed gratification, they want to spend it now. And to be honest they will get more for their £'s now than at any other time of year.

However - also at 2 & 4 they do not know they got £50 therefore they will only be spending £10ish..... They will be happy and plus they get to choose which is v.exciting. But maybe not so much for the kids you have described!!!!

OneDS · 29/12/2008 20:53

A lot of children receive money (don't get me started) from relatives now and are usually itching to spend it.

I was in a shop today buying a few things - gifts for xmas 09! DS was asking for things and I told him off or being so greedy and ungrateful at what father christmas had just brought him.

mummyloveslucy · 29/12/2008 20:53

I find it all very sad, how do the parents think there children will turn out ?
The writer Esther Selsdon once said

"If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them as you think you should...but half the amount of money".

socialpariah · 29/12/2008 21:00

My ds paternal grandmother sends him an obscene amount of money every christmas which I divide up among all the children. I then lie on the phone about the things I have bought for him.

shubiedoo · 29/12/2008 21:03

That is really
I don't think it's appropriate to give money to children under the age of 10...

Hulababy · 29/12/2008 21:05

How do you know all these children recieved loads on Christmas Day? Maybe many relatives sent money so they didn;t have lots of the dyay itself and were just excited about spending it today?

DD opened her vouchers before Christmas and we went shopping a few days beforehand - shops were so much quieter.

I can understadn why the children were eager to go and spend their money TBH. I personally wouldn't have stood for any tantrums like you describe thugh - any hint of that and it would all go back on the shelves!

NancysGarden · 29/12/2008 21:10

I was in the supermarket today too (megastore size) stocking up on basics we've run out of and it was evident even there...this frenzied buying. I don't really do sales so not sure if it's any different from the usual jan sales but I like Mummyloves' quote. There's no harm in having rules about money children receive as gifts (a percentage must be put away, must have an idea of what is going to be spent on before entering the shop to avoid buying for the sake etc) I believe you're right it doesn't lay down healthy spending habits.

Danae · 29/12/2008 21:10

Message withdrawn

socialpariah · 29/12/2008 21:14

its a guilt thing. Father has no interest and they live far away.

Original poster
MilaMae · 29/12/2008 21:15

I heard plenty of conversations about what they'd had,some were talking to friends, others were looking for things in the same range as what they'd had.

I'm sure there were maybe some exceptions but it was heaving with what can only be described as spoilt brats and parents hungry for bargains.

The true meaning of giving and receiving gifts was nowhere to be seen.

My eldest are 5 so I'm aware I maybe a bit green re all this but should my dc receive money in years to come I think I'll get them to focus on what they've been lucky enough to receive and save the money for the a later date. Isn't it a good thing to try and get kids to save,how can it be good to encourage them to go out and spend money on yet more stuff when they've only just had Christmas?

OP posts:
Ripeberry · 29/12/2008 21:17

There is going to be one BIG national headache and feeling of sickness by Spring. Something is going to give (again) and its like watching a car crash.

worleywinterwonderland · 29/12/2008 21:22

my ds's recieved some money but have persuaded the oldest (@10)to save it till we go down to london at the end of the month as he has an obsession with hamleys for some unknown reason, ds2 is only 2 an doesnt even know about it, he was more pleased with the card he got containing the money than the paper in it!

ds1 did want to go look at the toys when we went in asda yesterday and then wanted to buy more clone wars figures but i wouldnt let him and reminded him of all the toys etc he had just benn given.

worleywinterwonderland · 29/12/2008 21:22

my ds's recieved some money but have persuaded the oldest (@10)to save it till we go down to london at the end of the month as he has an obsession with hamleys for some unknown reason, ds2 is only 2 an doesnt even know about it, he was more pleased with the card he got containing the money than the paper in it!

ds1 did want to go look at the toys when we went in asda yesterday and then wanted to buy more clone wars figures but i wouldnt let him and reminded him of all the toys etc he had just benn given.

Danae · 29/12/2008 21:32

Message withdrawn

A7X · 29/12/2008 21:34

yabu
I took dd(severe sn) to toys r us today so she could spend her money. she doesn't often get to go and loved it.

ChasingSquirrels · 29/12/2008 21:34

me in tesco with the ds's today, we went down the toy bit to have a look (no sale on it and not busy).
ds1: can we get this?
me: of course we can't, we have only just had christmas.

...

NancysGarden · 29/12/2008 21:34

of course humans have to learn it. Like all socially responsible behaviours. And whose job is it to teach it?

NancysGarden · 29/12/2008 21:36

(Delayed gratification that is, esp nowadays!)

Ripeberry · 29/12/2008 21:36

I've always done delayed gratification, had to as my parents did not have much money.
So i find it VERY difficult to buy things for myself, it has to be something i NEED rather than want.
I usually find it easier to buy for others but never for myself.

Hulababy · 29/12/2008 21:37

DD saves other money. Christmas and brthday money she recieves she is allowed to spend all of as soon as she likes. I remember that excitement of getting vouchers to spend and the desire to go shopping with them. Maybe if DD was getting a lot of money then it might be different, but ours is only ever £20-30 in total anyway.

singyswife · 29/12/2008 21:37

Hi, My dd's got money from their great grandad because my gran die last christmas and he couldnt face going shopping, we all got envelopes. I took my dd's today and bought them new scooters and a digital camera each with the money as this is what he would have bought them had he been able to face the shops. They are not greedy children and came home with well over 50% of their money as they went for a scooter and a camera. Maybe the other children are in the same position????

p.s If they had threw tantrums or whiged about not having enough they would have been marched out of the shop and everything would have been left.

Danae · 29/12/2008 21:41

Message withdrawn

TWINSETinapeartree · 29/12/2008 21:46

My dd was given some money for Christmas I was thinking to myself today that I just cannot face going into shops again, and I only bought a few presents! And I do not want dd having more stuff! Although we only got her one thing other people got her quite a bit. Tbh she has not been that interested in spending it either.

I like that half the money but twice the time quote.

TWINSETinapeartree · 29/12/2008 21:47

But I did have a proud moment when we had our bi weekly financial meeting ( the credit crunch has well and truly hit the twinset house) dd offered her £30 Christmas money towards the rent!

IllegallyBrunette · 29/12/2008 21:47

This was me today. I took all 3 dc out to spend their birthday/xmas money and I had vouchers that i won for them to spend in build a bear factory too.

As far as I am concerned the money belongs to my children, and within reason they can do what they like with it. I was never restricted to what I spent my money on as a child and I have turned out ok (no one need argue )

We struggled home today with .....

1 scooter
2 fashion dolls
1 big doll
1 spiderman figure
1 transformer thing
3 build a bear boxes

My kids were thrilled to be able to buy their own things and took great care in deciding what to buy (ages and ages).

YABU