to give back some presents

[dmo]

my step mum bought me hair curlers fro christmas but my dh got me ghd's she was so happy with them that i said she could have them back. she also got me somw gloves but i had just got (its my birthday just b4 christmas) 3 pairs of leather gloves so told her to keep them too
we did laugh and she knows i am not being mean but dh said i was mean

no your dh is being silly

I disagree, to give presents back like that is incredibly rude and ungrateful behaviour imo BUT it really depends on how close your relationship is with your SM - if she's not offended (are you sure??) then no one else should be

what Pheebe said ...

I think its a bit mean, I would feel really guilty if it was me. One present is bad enough but two?

I'm afraid I think it's good manners to say thank you very much and deal with disposal of said presents later!

I agree with your DH. It is rude and mean to give presents back. When we get something we don't want in our family we either just keep it or exchange them ourselves.

I do think its a bit rude....

Rude

Incredibly rude - at best you could have explained you had doubled up on gifts and would she mind if your exchanged them?? Not told her to keep them!!

bad manners
My mum takes everything back that I buy her and I find that bad enough. Would be mortified if she told me to keep them

it depends how good your relationship is with her. I could easily do this with at least three people I know - anyone else even if they said they were fine with it would be having a wobble underneath.

Only you know how honest she was being.

can't believe you had to ask!

I have to agree and say that it is a bit rude...no matter how close your relationship - a gift is still a gift regardless!

Rude and bad manners.
After all you are going to sort out the gift by swapping or selling, you don't really have to tell the giver that.

I think its reasonable to tell someone if you are going to swap their gift, and to ask for the receipt in order to do that (as otherwise you only get the sale price back for it, if it has been reduced)

However, my DH think its rude and would rather keep something that he does not want.

Ask yourself how would you feel if it was the other way round ........... I think you may have your answer.

Oh I disagree with the majority

far better to be upfront and say you already have them. You could tell her she is so clever for knowing exactly what you wanted but unfortunately someone else had got there first.

Otherwise you will end up a) being given presents you don;'t want forever (still haven't the heart to tell my dad I hate terry prachett books after 17 years of him buying them for me every year)

b)waste the money they gave you

as a sm I would be pleased that my DSS felt able to tell me he already had said items.

If you get on with her and could tell she really wanted the hair curlers herself, which I think your op implies, then it would have been a bit mean to keep them and exchange them for something else.

noonki, I am with you but I think you should be responsible for actually going to swap the item. The present buying bit has already been done.

It depends so much on your relationship with the giver. I usually do a bit of quiet Ebaying/charity-shop with presents from either SIL: they mean well, presents not awful, but basically they tend to give me smellies and I am an Avon rep therefore have all the smellies a woman could want as it is. But in both cases I think they would be hurt and upset if I said I didn;t like/want the gifts so I do the cheery thankyous and pass the items on (I don't see either of them often enough for them to ask or fuss about whether I am using the things).

i knew she wanted the curlers anyway so said she could keep them told her dh had got me the ghd's
she really didnt mind think she got the curlers from woolies anyway so no good me taking them

Well tbh with the gloves I would have probably recycled them as a pressie.... this is often down with unwanted gifts better to do that than give back impo

rude rude rude