To think it is very bad manners of my sister to wear a hat to the table on christmas day?

[spookycharlotte121]

Were going out for a meal as the whole family on christmas day as there will be 10 of us and no one has the space to entertain everyone.
My sister has had a few issues with her hair and as a consiquence it was cut very short. It has not grown back much since the incident so to compensate this she wear hair extensions. Problem is she doesnt do them very well and they look a mess. She cant get them sorted before xmas and is now insisting she is wearing a hat to the table, similar to this one. I think it is really rude to do this especially as we will be out in a resteraunt but she is now say that Im trying to humiliate her.

hi needmorcoffe im good, just knackered, how are you? is your dd ok?

Yabu charlotte!

My elder sister was always telling me off for wearing things she didn't approve of. Stuff your grandparents. If she is self conscious about her hair she has every right to try and look as nice as possible.

The hat is very nice anyway.

I don't understand why you have a problem with it? How would you feel if she told you your outfit wasn't good enough?

I just think its bad manners to wear a hat to the table and think that she will be drawing more attention to herself by wearing it than not. but i spose it better than her having her hood up! I think she will only be wearing the hat because she is worried that my other sister will make rude comments. I wish she had told me sooner tho because i would have organised to get it sorted for her (my mum is away) and then this wouldnt even be an issue.

Abraid is right - it is perfectly correct etiquette for ladies to wear hats indoors - but not men (unless they're the King of course).

Try telling your parents and grandparents that the more they react to your sister's behaviour, the more she will do it. She's just being a rebellious 16 (my DD is the same age, if she wants to do anything, I just don't react unless it's potentially harmful, so she generally doesn't do it). She will grow out of this much quicker if she doesn't get a reaction. She WANTS a reaction! Let her wear her hat and just be grateful she hasn't seen any of Hassled or Pagwatch's suggestions.

I think you should all join in wearing silly hats. Perhaps it will kick off as a family festive tradition.

Surely everyone wears on of these to eat their Christmas dinner though?

Why doesn't she wear a christmassy hat? I don't think it's rude per se as it was always the done thing for ladies dining out or having tea in public to wear a hat ~ wasn't it?
Go easy on her or she'll feel very unhappy over the celebrations which will have a knock on effect.

Ooops! just read page 2...I've repeated what has already been said.

In a way im sad, i took her shopping and helped her to choose a really nice outfit for xmas dinner and I just want her to look nice, perhaps I can help her do something with her hair..... thats if she ever gets out of bed!!!

I think you should try to enter into the spirit of Christmas and be extra-sensitive to your sister's feelings about her hair rather than think she is being rude...

If it makes her feel more comfortable then what's the problem? Just ignore and carry on as usual. If that's what she wants to wear leave her to it.

Let her be.

She is 16.

I have seen plenty of kids wearing stuff like that.

It is Christmas and there are bigger things to stress about.

Just leave her alone! It's really not your business. Come to that, why is everyone in your family obsessed with your sister's hat? It's only a hat. It's not hurting anyone. Being rude is doing something that is deliberately offensive or unkind. A woolly hat is neither. Really, I'm sure you have better things to worry about! Why on earth would anyone be 'angry' about a hat? Live and let live and stop trying to control your sis.
Is this serious even??

It's only a hat - no biggie.

Just be thankful your sister will be with you at Christmas

if she's 16 leave her to it.

Big sisters always seem to be hung up on their little sisters' 'manners'.

I don't get it.
Nothing against you spookyC but mine just used to do this all the time - I was never socially acceptable in her eyes, no matter how inoffensive I tried to be.

Hope you and she can either sort her hair out together in a fun way or manage not to fall out!

I'd rather she wore a funky hat like that then came to the table with her norks hanging out!

Blimey
I didn't know that was the choice!

LOL - my SIL attended a family meal with a top on that was cut so low I thought I'd see nipple any second!!

am I wrong to love that hat?

all the youngsters are wearing these kinds of hats at the moment

leave her be, she is 16, plenty of time to be grown-up later on

you will make it worse by being huffy about it, tbh

that hat is cool.leave her be

So does the 'choose your battles' rule only apply to small children and not teenagers? It seems a whole lot of fuss about nothing to me, at least your sister is going. I know many a teen who would strop and think it 'uncool' to be seen out with the 'oldies'

TBH I wouldn't give a toss if my dd1 attended xmas dinner dressed as monkey if it meant she left the house on time and without a fuss. She is only 5 but I imagine that if her behavior gets worse as she gets older I will still feel the same when she is 16.

I agree with SGB. It's a hat.

SpookyC, sorry if I've got you mixed up but am I right in thinking that you have longer term concerns about your sister's social skills and mental health?

If so I still think YABU but I can see why you might feel like this was the final straw.

SHe is 16 - they all do stupid things and if she really hates her hair what is the issue here - you have a problem with it but it seems perfectly normal thing for a 16 year old to do because their brains are only 16 and they all have mirrors where wearing stupid hats like this means they look cool where as we wonder why the hell they are wearing something that you would on;y wear stuck on top of a mountain in a centrally heated building!

Take pictures, wait till she is 21 and take piss!