To think that at 23 this is rediculously immature! And for letting it p*ss me right off!

[jingleMAMADIVAsbells]

ARGH!

Sorry I've mentioned this on here before but basically my best friend, who is a gay male, and my DP just cannot get on.

I am 22 friend is 17, he is a drag queen by profession so he is quite loud and sings all the time blah de blah but that doesn't bother me but for some reason DP hates him and it's getting pathetic.

He is basically the bloody biggest wimp ever, if someone hits him he runs away type of thing but I've noticed he's started to pick on my friend for absolutely nothing now. Saying he's too loud, a fat poof, just annoying now when he first said he annoyed him I did tell friend to stop coming round so much butnot totally just because I thought well I'd expect DP to do same thing if I disliked his mates so much.

Anyway friend was in on Monday night for about an hour him and DP never aid a word to each other (despite DP saying he was going to 'crack him' when he saw him, as I said all mouth), then friend was going to come round last night for an hour or 2 to help me decorate tree, I've never done it before, and DP said he was going to get a few beers. Fine by me. Friend ended up not coming over BTW.

This morning DP is in bed and he got a text, DP says to pick up and answer if can same as I do with him, but it just said

'Aye just crack the prick or take the piss as a 'joke' of course.'

So I thought whos he on about checked sent messages and found this

'Aye fuckin Alan Carr's (apparently friend looks like him off to get bevvy, get pie eyed and take the piss out of the c*nt, good times eh? HAHA'

Now I think that is bloody pathetic, DP is 23 it's just really pissing me off as I spoke to him about it a few weeks ago he apologised etc.

Sorry for rant just wanyted to explan

YANBU.

i couldn't be with someone with those views

he sounds awful

YANBU. Your partner sounds like a bigot.

the poof thing sounds off unfortunately homophobia seems socially acceptable to many.other than that the thing with the friend sounds as though he was venting because as you say he's all mouth so would never actually do anything.
bit of a nightmare situation for you both,what with him hating your friend.you seem to have compromised by inviting him round less,your husband should compromise by biting his tongue.although i don't know why you'd expect him to talk to him when he does come round.as you've said,he hates the guy and he's your friend not his.
however yanbu,althoguh the conversation with the friend just seems like bravado.

THing I dont get is he has gay friends!

He seems to use it as an excuse why he dislikes my friend but some of his friends are much, much worse IMO.

I think sometimes he's jealous of the way we get on and I will admit at times I get on better with him than DP but surely this is not the way to go about sorting it out...

We very nearly split up a few weeks back because we just didn't talk and one of the things we said we would sort would be him sorting ut his attitude, he goe to his mates on enight a week for a drink and when he comes back he starts arguments with me or whatever so we said he'd stop drinking so much too.

Now correct me if I'm wrong but to me what he was planning last night would have deliberatey started a riot with me because he was picking on friend, so therefore I dont think he's actually that arsed about our relationship.

Well the way he's going I thin me and DS would be better off without hm...

It's not that I expect them to talk mayor but I hate the atmosphere because DP picks on friend 'jokingly' which makes him very very uncomfortable so he basically sits in silence afraid to talk

I would maybe expect a hi or summit though just out of common courtesy.

The other thing that annoys me though is that my friend is also best friends with my cousin who is also a gay male aged 18 and we normally han out together, DP gets on with him fine and even tries to convince him that other friend is an arsehole or whatever so its not that hes homophobic

does he fancy him?

well that's strangely reassuring in a way that he's not homophobic.he just hates this other guy. not that this helps you in any way, or that i'm condning his actions, he should just grin and bear it when he's around to avoid arguments.fwiw i'd be the same as your husband in that i can't stand loud, overly camp people (male /female/straight/ gay) where i'd differ though is that i would not be openly rude to them.and your oh needs to grow up a bit (i'm only 23 as well but know what is productive) sounds like he enjoys arguing though where as i'd try and avoid it.