to find it annoying how so many kids books and films make out stepmothers are evil.

[notallstepmumsaremean]

we have just watched enchanted.
yes another kids movie making with an evil stepmum.

must be a tough job being a stepmum, and it would be nice if disney whoever could put a modern twist on a new film where the stepmum is the hero

There has been loads of psychological and academic research done on this. It is a recognised issue steeped in misogyny.

My SIL calls my MIL her wicked stepmum as a family joke as it is almost expected that a SM is nasty. (They do get on, MIL finds it amusing)
We find it funny, but YANBU that it should be the first thing you think of.

It's a common trope in children's literature. It's about creating a situation where the child protagonist can't rely on the adults who would normally protect them, and therefore they are thrust into being innovative and self-reliant and thus the story can unfold (e.g. Cinderella wouldn't be much of a story if the lovely supportive stepmother said 'of course you can go to the ball, come on let's go to Monsoon and try on prom dresses', would it?)

But yes, I agree, being a stepmother must be a really hard job and it would be nice to see it redressed a bit in films. Julia Roberts did try in 'Stepmom' if I recall.

I sign all my texts and letters to DSD "ESM" (Evil Step Mother).

She just thought I was spelling my name reaaaalllly badly.

It is a bit cliched though.

yabu, aren't they?

I have a wicked step mum, she ticks all the boxs, nasty, viscious, narcissistic...... I could go on?

misshardbroom's right, it's a handy literary device. And also an archetype that runs through our culture - I guess in the olden days people were less inclined to look after someone else's child. And stepmotherhood was VERY common in the days when so many women died in childbirth. Look at all those medieval Queens who plotted to put their sons on the throne and get rid of the big brothers...

I have just asked my 5 year old DD what a step mother is and she has just replied "a mother that isn't very nice" . In fairness, she has no concept of divorce given that no-one in the family is divorced, similarly none of her friends have divorced parents - so her understanding of the term is probably limited to books and films. She does love enchanted, but I have tried to restict Disney (can't stand it myself), so I don't know where she gets this idea from - but its not from me so yes, I agree with you!

How exactly could you replace evil stepmothers in children's stories? Not sure it would be any better to have natural mothers jealous of/working against their children.

I'm always considered the Evil step mum by my brothers and sister and Crulla De Ville. As I had to look after them while parents were at work and I was never happy in that role. So I never went near anybody with a previous relationship with children. I couldn't cope with being a step mum. Even though I'm now I think a very nice adult to kids. Ended up marrying at 40 to 46 years year old with no kids. Might have missed out. But hey it all worked out in the wash

I don't think it is an evil stepmum thing in Enchanted though. After all, Giselle ends up being stepmum which the little girl is happy with (sorry if that's a spoiler, but if you can't see that coming from the start of the film, you shouldn't be allowed a TV in case you eat the remote )

I'm more worried about the message that being cute and fluffy will get you everywhere in life, whereas being a strong, stroppy woman will make you miserable until you let a prince come and sweep you off your feet. Behind every hard-nosed career woman is the secret romantic

But I do agree that stepmum's get a real raw deal in culture. If it's not the stepmum, then it's the evil aunt, uncle and cousin triumvirate (I'm reading Eight Days of Luke at the moment)

authors have to kill off the parents otherwise children would never get to have ANY adventures at all.

I'd like to sympathise but you see, my step mum is evil.

I nearly had step-children, the youngest (9yo at start) convinced himself that I was Very Evil Indeed but I got on fabulously with the other two (teenagers). The 9yo built my supposed character from film & literature but it was probably a valuable working-through exercise for him.

Princesses are beautiful. MIL are control-fraeks who never let go of their sons. Grandfathers are kindly old duffers. And stepmums are evil. Ever it was so.

Excellent idea - lets's rewrite the rest of Western culutral history while we're at it.

Maybe at the same time they could do a version of the Merchant of Venice where the Jewish guy's a luagh a minute and dishes out chocolate coins to the kiddies?

I do always wonder why fairy stories emphasise the wicked stepmother and let the father off the hook, though. What on earth was Hansel and Gretel's dad thinking? Huh?

Oh no, I love the evil stepmother thing. The source of endless jokes and complicity with my stepsons

Right on pantomimEDAMe and Cinderella. Want a wimpy gits they are.