...to not always want to "chip in"

[Raalix]

I work as a peripatetic teacher of music and drama in several primary schools in the area. Before I did this I worked as an ordinary class teacher in one school.

Several times through the year, the school would do a collection to buy something for teachers who were getting married, having a baby, had a recent death in the family, having a birthday, etc. We would be expected to chip in with anything from £1 to £5 for said cause.

Now that I work in several schools throughout the week, I find myself being asked to contribute in this way much more often. When I worked in a single school, I didn't hesitate to offer money for these causes. But now I find myself not wanting to.

As a teacher in a single school I would be expected to pay between £20-£30 throghout the year for these things. Now, I could potentially pay upwards of £100.

Am I being unreasonable to not want to always contribute? Am I within my rights to pick and choose when I want to contribute or should I say no to all of them?

Yes, by all means tell them to feck off.Ridiculous.

If it's someone you actually know and care about, then contribute what you can/want to. If it's a random TA or teacher you've chatted to once in a staffroom then just never have your purse with you.

I do get disparaging looks when I have said I'd rather not contribute and I am made to feel really guilty.

I don't think these other members of staff appreciate how many schools I work in and how many times I get asked for money.

I do work as part of an expressive arts team and if we were ever collecting for one of the team, I wouldn't hesitate.

YANBU. It's too much. Better to pick and choose.

my mum was a teacher and she felt all the contributory things were getting out of control.

I recently had 2 children, so went on two separate maternity leaves, and received a collection present both times, I felt a bit awkward the second time as I felt they probably felt a bit irritated about giving again... its a nightmare

Ive never worked in an office, is it the same there?

btw I feel you are completely in your rights to refuse/pick and choose...just explain.
they are unreasonable and cheeky tbh, approaching staff who arent there 24/7 / are in multiple schools.

It's the same with staff nights out. I get invited to all of them and would be required to pay something like a £10 deposit and the rest on the night. I firmly refuse to go on any staff night out as it would empty my bank account!

Pick and choose, deffo

Only do the ones that you think you have had a lot to do with and are particularly friendly. Just tell them politely that you work at several schools and can't keep up with all staff.

I think if I pick and choose people then some people might wonder what my reasons are.

I may pick and choose causes - such as every bereavement. Would that be appropriate?

I did this when I was a SEN teacher - 5 different schools through the week. I was seriously pissed off when I left as not one of the schools even gave me a leaving card let alone gift and I'd contributed to collections for years so your are most definately NOT being unreasonable!

I just thought there might be some staff that you work more closely with than others. If difficult then your suggestion seems the best.

Same in offices

I pick and choose but always feel guilty saying no!

i get the same thing in my role.

yanbu but I continue out of cowardice nonetheless!!

I wouldn't say that I work more closely with certain members of staff. I pretty much go in, teach the little brats kids and leave.

There are certainly members of staff who I like better but I wouldn't want to pick and choose on likeablility.

At our school this year we are all paying a set amount (£10) and all pressies cards etc will come out of this. We will review it towards the end of the year. Any funds left will either be carried forward or used for a treat!
We only ask our regular staff(teachers, TAs, admin) not teachers who come in to take music lessons.

don't you do it 'blind'?? (so in a brown envelope which is passed around) I thought most places did - then you can put anything in! I would vary between £1 and £20 depending on who they were.

Not in some schools. Sometimes they send a plastic tub round.

Most times they specify what amount should be put in so they will know if someone hasn't paid.

Yanbu

yanbu -same in offices.. remember being asked to contribute to a wedding present to someone who had been in the office for two weeks and i'd never met...

contribute when you want to,when if feels appropriate and relevant.sad as it is that Bert has verrucas you dont need to chip in every turn a tin rattles

YANBU and should not feel to obliged to contribute everytime. I'd say something like, I don't really know them, or I've only met them once.

YANBU you shouldn't feel guilty either. The other teachers have probably not even thought about the other schools you go to.

Because I teach their class, I couldn't say I don't know them. I need to meet with them to discuss planning, report on pupil assessment, inform on behaviour issues etc.

If I was going to tell a white lie I would have to say something like I left my wallet at home.

I would probably be perfectly honest and say that I object to dishing out the dosh in every school for every Tom, Dick and Harry. What makes it really difficult sometimes is when pupils are sent round with the collection money and would give you the most awful look if you refused to contribute.

I hope you get birthday pressies from them all as well!!!!

YANBU. Dh used to have a similar job to yours and only ever contributed if it was a member of the music service team or a member of the music department he worked with in a particular school.